My mom made a comment to me like this the other day... she said: "God, what are you going to do when you lose Jackson?" We had been talking about death for some reason... I think we saw a movie or something. My heart sank at the thought of it... you know it's inevitable, and you know you're going to lose them and you hope they live a LONG life but you just never know.... that's why I really don't take him for granted. He means everything to me and we do *so* much together. I know that when I look back, I will have thousands of photos, hundreds of videos, thousands of posts on YT (lol) and the gazillion memories in my head.
Nothing will compare to the loss of my 6 year old brother a few years ago. That, besides losing your own child, is probably the worst thing you can go through. A perfectly healthy young little boy with his whole life ahead of him taken in an instant... nothing will compare to that pain, so I know I will be able to handle death "better" from now on, but of course it doesn't make it easier.
I just try and not worry too much, and just live everyday to the fullest. Jackson leads an amazingly fulfilling life and I think he knows how much I love him.
