For me, it was just a matter of keeping on trying until they are used to it. Sophie has only just now gotten to where she will let me keep her hair up during the day. She'll only paw at it a little. I use either bands or barrettes during the day, but no bows unless we go out. For the bows, she doesn't mind them if we go out. I think she knows she's getting to go somewhere. For clothes, she never really had a problem with them. When we first brought her home, we got her a small sweater and she would wear it around the house during the day and that helped get her used to it. She never really fought me on her harness, so I don't know how to help you there. She loves it, actually, since she knows she gets to go outs.
