[YorkieLove77]

This is going to be long, so please bare with me as I'm typing with tears and a heavy heart.

I'm a flight attendant who is usually gone about half the month, so JoJo stays with family while I'm gone. The days I'm home he is glued to me 24/7. He loves me with all his heart and I love him 1,000 times more. When I first got him it was with the understanding that the days I was gone he would be looked after by my boyfriend whom I lived with, but we are no longer together. It's not easy being a single girl with this career and having a young dog, but I make it work.

In the past year or so, tons of changes have been happening at my job due to a merger of 2 major airlines (mine being the one acquired), and we could possibly lose our union representation. There is rumor that should we lose our union, many of us may lose our jobs. Because of this, after a long and hard consideration, I decided to go back to school so that I'll have an education to fall back on to pursue other avenues, if I needed to.

At first I was excited by the thought of going to school, and even decided to pursue a degree in nursing. As I was happily applying for financial aid, and excitedly applying for enrollment, it suddenly hit me. What's going to happen to JoJo while I'm away from home 1/2 the month for work AND going to school full-time? I can't believe it never occured to me before. I was too caught up in myself to think about his well-being and care. I know many people do it with a dog, but what does that do to their quality of life? It's not fair to them...nor would it be to JoJo.

I can't believe my fingers are going to type this next sentence... But I'm now facing the most agonizing decision of giving my beloved JoJo away. It's hard to convey emotion via writing, but I am crying so hard right now it's hard to see straight. I love him with all my heart and all my soul. I don't have children yet, so he IS my baby. I kiss him over 100 times a day. I don't think an hour goes by that I don't tell him I love him. My heart aches when I don't see him for a couple days...heck, even a short run to the grocery store makes me miss him. So how would I ever EVER be able to give him away?? If I don't pursue my education, I could very well end up unemployed and broke and still be forced to give him up due to not being able to care for him financially.

I'm so torn, agonized, distraught...and my heart is aching more than it's ever ached before. People tell me he's just a dog...I don't care...I love him more than anything in this world!! I keep praying to God to please help me make this decision and take some of this pain from my heart. I just don't know what to do! I'm feeling so incredibly guilty...guilty for taking this little guy into my heart and forcing myself into his...only to possibly rip myself from him and making him feel like I don't love him anymore. He is only 1 1/2 years old...he's still a baby. Oh God, I can't stop crying.

What I do know, however, is that I feel this site is a blessing for me. Although I don't know what to do or how I'm going to do it, I do know one thing: Many of the people on this site are incredibly amazing. I've never seen such love for one's pets as much as I see here. Before I found YT, I wouldn't have been able to tell the difference between someone from here with a good reputation looking for a Yorkie and some random person looking for one on Craigslist. Nor would I have considered what type of care or environment a person could give a dog as much as I would today. With that being said...

If I come to the decision of rehoming JoJo (I had to pause after typing that out...I'm just a wreck right now), I would like him to go to a YT member. I would like for him to keep his name, and I would like this person to keep me updated on him forever. But above all, I would require he goes to a loving, caring forever home where he would thrive and never be sad. I would not be looking for any rehoming fees, or costs of any sort...I would only require he goes to a GOOD home...and ONLY to a reputable member here. Would my requests be reasonable? Would I be asking too much? I don't know much of anything right now, I only know my heart is breaking in a million pieces and I'm so torn and hurting so much.

I hope this post is not inappropriate in any way...I just need help deciding and determining what's best - not for me, but for JoJo. Keeping him would keep this joy that he brings me in my heart, but it would also mean a diminished quality of life for him if I enroll in school, and I just cannot do that to him. It wouldn't be fair to him!

I'm begging for help...advice...anything. Please!