Oh honey, I feel you!!
I have 3 teenagers; daughter that is 18, son that is 16 and daughter that is 14. I have been divorced from their father for the past 9 years and remarried to their stepdad for almost 5 years. Although my husband tries to help, I am essentially a single parent with my kids. Their bio father lives over 700 miles away from us and my parents are both deceased.
My kids can give me hell sometimes, but I do not allow them to disrespect me. They can be very self centered at these ages, however, and at those times, I sit them down (usually in the car on the way to somewhere) and have a heart to heart. I do not mind reminding them that I sacrifice a whole lot for them, and that I do it because I love them not because I have to. I also remind them that I'm human also and get my feelings hurt just like they do. I never use physical punishment, but will take away cell phones and privledges when necessary.
I firmly believe that my children need to be responsible, caring individuals and have goals for themselves. I realize that their pulling away from me is normal and with my 18 year old heading off to college this year, I am thankful for that in a way. I am having a hard time with the thought that my baby is leaving me and is becoming a grown woman, but I do not let her know that too much. I want her to be independent and leave the nest.
When they start driving you crazy, remind them that you have feelings also. Then try to remember that you can't prevent them from making mistakes, you can only guide them. Do the best you can do and have peace of mind knowing that you are giving them your all. |