[megooego]

Too bad dat ur not my buddie, Sam.
(According to my last cwue, my buddie is a gurl.)

..Cuz mi mommie werks at dis place called Dicks Sportin Guds and dey sell wots of moufgards. I axed her wun time if she wuld get me wun and she said no. She sed dey are onlee fur peepel pwayin sportz. Mom's can b so mean sumtimez.