Well, in our case, Hot Rod had his teeth out at this neuter. He was 6 1/2 mos old and had double rows of teeth. He had 14 teeth removed at that time. He did fine other than I should have insisted on pain meds!
Hot Rod's personality did not change. He is just as loving as ever and I don't imagine that he would have been any different if he had not been neutered. He did't put any weight on either (another thing that some people thinks happen). He had not started to lift his leg yet and now he only lifts his leg outdoors. Never has nor does he mark indoors.
It has to be something you feel comfortable with but I am glad that we had him neutered. If you need to have his teeth removed, this would be a good time to do so so he will not have to go under anestheisa 2x. Another reason would be to keep any possible "breeding" mishaps as well as help with his overal health down the road.
I am sorry to hear about your cat. Good luck with your decision.
