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Originally Posted by BaxtersMommy  I am pretty sure that if my husband cheated, I would want to know everything about the woman. I would FIND OUT who she was! What did she have I didnt? What did she do that I didn't? It would never cross my mind that "he didnt keep it in his pants." |
You are being too hard on yourself. If your husband cheated, why would you automatically assume that YOU failed in some way or lacked something? Your reaction is not unusual, by the way. Why do women do this???? What is this self-loathing that women have? THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU!
And why are women so quick to hold a grudge against another woman, a woman she may not even know, and yet forgive the man who is supposed to love and honor her???.
look at it this way....if you clawed out the eyes of the other woman, would that make things better between you and your husband? Of course not. Because the problem is not the other woman--the problem is your husband.
He will just find someone else to cheat with.
Men are not stupid, nor are they defenseless against the wiles of an attractive, seductive woman. I think some men would like women to think this, because it takes away their accountability, and puts all the fault on the evil temptresses....women. If a man cheats, he is doing it because he has chosen to do so. Plain and simple.
fyi, this does not mean I think women should go out and have affairs with married men. I would never recommend that because it is a waste of time, and very rarely do such relationships lead to committed, stable relationships. The woman usually gets hurt and feels used, and the man is not available to be with her when she might really need him to help through a tough time, etc. AND a man who will cheat on his wife will later cheat on his mistress. Rule of thumb: Once a cheater, always a cheater.