i havent stopped cyring yet; but i was praying today that if i have to give her up that it would someone that works at the vet office or hospital; and i am thankful that my prayers were answered adn that we had a good hearted vet tonight; i couldnt believe she was crying with me adn i knew that she will be the best for Ava; at least she can provide her 100% care that she deserves; i had to be strong for her sake not mine; i didnt want her to suffer any longer and possibly die from this chronic disease; this was her 4th relapse this year adn this can cause damage to her pancreas adn other organs that she might not be able to recover later on.
what's so weird ; is ava had tears in her eyes today when i took her to er; like she knew that will be the last time i see her; i felt it this morning too for some reason. i knew i can no longer take care of her
my heart is breaking; i will always miss her; all i want to do right now is hold her shirt adn smell it; i cant even look at her bed , clothes, toys............ it's breaking my heart; i hope this will get easier. i love her so much
