I just read your story and I'm at work with tears streaming down my face. I lost my Missy on Halloween 2008. She was a 15 year old Shih Tzu. When she was 12 we thought that her time had come. She was epileptic, blind, pretty much deaf and had a multitude of other problems. She just seemed to really be going downhill. For some unknown reason she rebounded. I thank God for the extra three years we got with her. She had some kind of major illness every few months but in between she was really pretty good. In the end she had pancreatic cancer and we couldn't keep her blood sugar stable. She quit eating and I had to syringe feed her every two hours around the clock. I was willing to do that but her quality of life was non-existent. My vet talked to me and we made the decision to let her go. We brought her home for a few days to let our daughter come home from college and spend some time with her. Even when you know that the decision you are making is the humane and right thing to do, there is so much guilt in "playing God".
I'm telling you this because I want you to know that only God knows when their time really is. Be prepared for the worst but don't let that put a shadow on the time you have remaining with her. Love her, enjoy her and be thankful for whatever time you have left. Try not to live for the known ultimate ending but for the days that you have before that comes. The last bit of time we had with Missy was a very happy gift.
Another small piece of advice I would give is if there is someone who you really trust - in my case it was my Vet - let them help you with making the decision about your babies quality of life. I probably would have kept her going if he hadn't pointed out to me that pretty much she was already gone and I needed to let her body go with her.
Bless you - I'm praying for you. |