Little Yorkie was gone Monday morning (Oct 19, 2009) at 8:25. When I went to visit him in the hostipal on Sunday, he was doing well. He was still on the ventilator, but he was lying there with great comfort. He reconganized our voice and he was trembling although he could not move at all. His bloold pressure suddenly went up the moment I was in the room and talking. He responded promptly when we touched his eyelid. Doctor said everything was normal with him and his breath gets lighter and lighter, and they hoped him to get better every hour and were prepared to get him off ventilator and let him breathe on his own. I was so excited and thankful, I thought he would soon come back and I could hold him in my arm again tomorrow.
Doctor called the same afternoon and updated that he was off ventilator and he was doing fine. We prayed the whole night and count each minute on the way of getting him back. We woked up at 3 AM then 4 AM in the morning, and no emergency call and we thought he has passed the most difficult time. We are so ready to touch him and talk to him soon. Then at 4:50, my phone ringed and the doctor called in and said he was breathing with difficulty. She said he has liquid in his lung and she would like to do some treatment although it most likely to be helpless. I was like being knocked down from heavy to hell. I don't understand why this, the day before they did ultrasound all over his chest and abodomen and said evrything looked normal. Then in the next four hours, I kept walking and trembling in the dark living room, and praying the god not to take him away from me. Finally the doctor called and said they were doing treatment and he was getting better, but suddenly there is blood coming out of his chest and his breath stopped. There is abosolutely not possible to get him back and she euthanized him.
That is it, with full of hope, joy and anxiety, I was waiting for the miracle to come, but all of a sudden, he was taken away. I could not accept the fact, I lept recalling every moment in the past week since he got sick, regretting there might be a different result if I have done this or that.... But when I stand before his empty cold canine, there is only one truth in reality, I lost him forever. |