YorkieTalk.com Forums - Yorkshire Terrier Community - View Single Post

FlDebra · 09-08-2009, 07:23 AM

I think most new members hold back a little during their first few months to get the lay of the land and learn a little about members and general forum personality. But......

Several times in the last couple of months a very new member (usually onboard for 2-3 weeks) has made disparaging remarks against seasoned forum members who have reputations for unselfishly sharing their knowledge and experience. These remarks are often made out of hand, without any evident research into the valuable contributions the attacked member may have made. There are members that have EARNED OUR RESPECT and deserve better treatment than they are getting by a few new and outspoken members.

It is usually a good idea when you join a forum to take a couple of months to really get the feel for its members before unloading a birage of insults. Don't disagree with one post they make and then attack their entire personality, breeding philosphy or contribution to the forum. Sometimes I see them even twist the respected breeders comments and then argue with something that was never said in the first place, leaving the rest of us to shake our heads or worse.....to start up a nasty debate where there was really no disagreement in the first place.

If you feel like attacking a breeder, research the Breeder Talk Forum and KNOW what you are talking about before you speak out of the wrong end! You might find out they are responsible, caring and educate the forum in many ways and then you might just decide not to attack them.

If you feel like attacking a pet owner, take a minute to look through their past posts to get a feel for what they say and how they treat others. You may be surprised to find they are very thoughtful and caring and then you might just decide not to attack them.

It is fine to debate, to disagree and to offer alternative opinions. That is one of the best parts of the forums -- getting different perspectives/sides of an issue. But when you have to resort to personal insults to disagree, then it is obvious you have no contribution of your own.

People should not think that a couple of recent volunteer activities somehow elevates them into such a lofty position that they can look down on a breeder that has made a lifetime commitment to the breed, contributing YEARS of valuable information, education, and responsible breeding practices to better the breed and help educate both Yorkie owners and new breeders alike. No one should make assumptions about another member before they get to know them! When someone has to start tooting their own horn, to try to make a point, it belittles their input, IMO.

We have the absolute honor of several experienced and devout Yorkie breeders sharing their wealth of knowledge with us here on YT. They deserve our respect and courtesy! If we do not stop abusing the priviledge of their presence here, we could very well lose it!

All I am asking is a little bit of restraint for those new to the forum. Take time to get to know the members, learn the contributions of others, and don't be so quick to draw conclusions that may well be unfounded and make you look the fool. If you disagree with a subject, address the subject only. Do not make character assasinations just because you think differently. Feel free to take on an issue, but stick to the issue and not personal insults or name calling. Don't try to twist what someone says just so you can make a magnanimous statement.

If you think it is a bad idea, say it is a bad idea, not a bad member. Remember that when a seasoned breeder offers another side of an issue, it just might be a good idea to LISTEN! We have all seen how one-way organizations and media can slant an issue and make isolated incidents appear to be the norm. Keep your minds open! None of us are perfect and I have made mistakes in being too quick to answer too. These reminders are good for all of us to think about.

Hopefully I have made it clear that in no way am I suggesting that you can't argue with an experienced, knowlegeable breeder. All I am saying, is keep it professional without the insults and KNOW what you are talking about before you make obvious wrong conclusions. Sticking your foot in your mouth right off the bat may take a long time to overcome when it comes to the rest of the forum respecting you! Always read more than you type. If we close our minds we miss a lot of learning opportunities. Speak your mind, but mind your speech!

09-08-2009, 07:23 AM	#1
FlDebra Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: FL Posts: 7,651	Earned Respect! I think most new members hold back a little during their first few months to get the lay of the land and learn a little about members and general forum personality. But...... Several times in the last couple of months a very new member (usually onboard for 2-3 weeks) has made disparaging remarks against seasoned forum members who have reputations for unselfishly sharing their knowledge and experience. These remarks are often made out of hand, without any evident research into the valuable contributions the attacked member may have made. There are members that have EARNED OUR RESPECT and deserve better treatment than they are getting by a few new and outspoken members. It is usually a good idea when you join a forum to take a couple of months to really get the feel for its members before unloading a birage of insults. Don't disagree with one post they make and then attack their entire personality, breeding philosphy or contribution to the forum. Sometimes I see them even twist the respected breeders comments and then argue with something that was never said in the first place, leaving the rest of us to shake our heads or worse.....to start up a nasty debate where there was really no disagreement in the first place. If you feel like attacking a breeder, research the Breeder Talk Forum and KNOW what you are talking about before you speak out of the wrong end! You might find out they are responsible, caring and educate the forum in many ways and then you might just decide not to attack them. If you feel like attacking a pet owner, take a minute to look through their past posts to get a feel for what they say and how they treat others. You may be surprised to find they are very thoughtful and caring and then you might just decide not to attack them. It is fine to debate, to disagree and to offer alternative opinions. That is one of the best parts of the forums -- getting different perspectives/sides of an issue. But when you have to resort to personal insults to disagree, then it is obvious you have no contribution of your own. People should not think that a couple of recent volunteer activities somehow elevates them into such a lofty position that they can look down on a breeder that has made a lifetime commitment to the breed, contributing YEARS of valuable information, education, and responsible breeding practices to better the breed and help educate both Yorkie owners and new breeders alike. No one should make assumptions about another member before they get to know them! When someone has to start tooting their own horn, to try to make a point, it belittles their input, IMO. We have the absolute honor of several experienced and devout Yorkie breeders sharing their wealth of knowledge with us here on YT. They deserve our respect and courtesy! If we do not stop abusing the priviledge of their presence here, we could very well lose it! All I am asking is a little bit of restraint for those new to the forum. Take time to get to know the members, learn the contributions of others, and don't be so quick to draw conclusions that may well be unfounded and make you look the fool. If you disagree with a subject, address the subject only. Do not make character assasinations just because you think differently. Feel free to take on an issue, but stick to the issue and not personal insults or name calling. Don't try to twist what someone says just so you can make a magnanimous statement. If you think it is a bad idea, say it is a bad idea, not a bad member. Remember that when a seasoned breeder offers another side of an issue, it just might be a good idea to LISTEN! We have all seen how one-way organizations and media can slant an issue and make isolated incidents appear to be the norm. Keep your minds open! None of us are perfect and I have made mistakes in being too quick to answer too. These reminders are good for all of us to think about. Hopefully I have made it clear that in no way am I suggesting that you can't argue with an experienced, knowlegeable breeder. All I am saying, is keep it professional without the insults and KNOW what you are talking about before you make obvious wrong conclusions. Sticking your foot in your mouth right off the bat may take a long time to overcome when it comes to the rest of the forum respecting you! Always read more than you type. If we close our minds we miss a lot of learning opportunities. Speak your mind, but mind your speech! __________________ FlDebra and her ABCs Annie, Ben, Candy Promoting Healthy Breeding to the AKC Yorkshire Terrier Standard Last edited by FlDebra; 09-08-2009 at 07:26 AM.