Mr. Darcy would run off with my jogging shoes when he was such a tiny thing. Butt and head held high, I don't know how he even managed to carry one. Then he got into stealing company's shoes if they kicked them off. Eventually he digressed into trying to take their shoes off for them.
Dryer sheets are a real special prize, especially in 20,000 shreds.
Mr. Darcy is also into raiding visitors purses that land on the floor with their shoes. I just warn them that possession IS nine tenths of the law......
Who'd want to hamper such a comic effort?