Your hubby may not be an alcohol or on drugs, but he is very co-dependent on his family and their addictions - thus the need to provide a place to take care of everyone and not have any consequences.
I think the only way you two are going to make it here it to get some counseling as a couple and for him to learn appropriate boundaries and that his behavior is helping no one, but rather allowing them to continue to be dysfunctional.
Sending you tons of prayers as this is very difficult to deal with.
__________________  Sissy & Angel |