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Originally Posted by MizMaRLeysMoM86  [SIZE="3"]
I know , I know. I might be being a big baby about this or overreacting but I can not get that image of him or the "feeling" of touching his body out of my mind. It is making me nauseous. Like I said I have never really felt death before, like the rigormortis part of death, and I think I have really scarred myself mentally. I know it is something that I am going to have to face eventually in life, but I was definitely not prepared. I had expected to go in and start giving CPR or unlodge something that he was choking on. I cannot for the life of me figure out why she did not feel him first  Maybe she isn't too bright? Maybe she was too scared or freaked out? Maybe it didn't even occur to her to check him first before getting help. I don't know. What I do know is this will be with me for the rest of my life I think. |
I don't think you're being a big baby or overreacting. If you have never felt death, that in itself is traumatic. Then you went in there with the mindset of giving first aid and the shock of realizing the poor dog was already dead was just more trauma. I think that given time you will find a way to come to terms with this, but I think you need to allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come right now.
As far as why she didn't check the dog, there are many possible answers. I think you may be right, she might not have been the brightest bulb just considering the way she "cared" for the dog, but who knows. You went in with the very best intentions and you did what you could. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that you find a way to resolve the turmoil you're feeling. Hang in there, and please keep us posted as to how you're doing.