[Sugar's Mom]

Originally Posted by tammys

I have read so much of this today, my head is swimming.


I know what you mean about making premature judgements, but I didn't have to be on here more than a day to read replies that could have been worded with more thought, empathy, and compassion.

After reading those, my thought was not, "Wow, that person really knows her stuff, and is being so helpful." It was, "Wow, that person was rude."

I also did not need to be here long to see that there were very knowledgeable, helpful people on here. But sometimes that knowledge was drowned out by judgment and rudeness. It's just those few negative ones that stick out, b/c they tend to be hurtful and insulting.


I'm not talking about sugar-coating things; but there needs to be an awareness that someone might feel attacked or judged b/c of the tone of the reply. Then what good had been achieved? You might feel better b/c you got it off your chest, but who was really helped? Not the person who needed it.

It's so hard to decipher that tone through writing though...that's the reason we should take the extra step to make sure it comes across as supportive and helpful. The facts absolutely must be shared, but the OP shouldn't be made to feel badly. They should be thinking, "I am so glad to be on this board, and get so much help and advice." They shouldn't feel attacked or scared to post something.

I am also not defending all OP's. I have read some that literally make me shake my head in disbelief. I feel badly for the person/dog/situation, and would love to make it better if I could. But I know that anger will not help anyone. Like I said before, many of you know how these exasperating situations can end. I imagine that this knowlege and possible memories make you want to just smack someone silly! But it doesn't work. Educating others without judgment will go a long way in improving bad situations, and possibly worse outcomes.


I am one of the few people I know (not patting myself on the back, but like you said, just calling a duck a duck) that goes out of her way to make sure she does not hurt people's feelings. Because I tend to be overly sensitive, I make sure I don't make someone else feel badly.

So, when I see someone being curt or rude, it bothers me. It is the middle of the night, and I have rambled enough and feel like my posts keep repeating themselves. I would love to put this to rest, and have everyone be happy. I realize I may be living in a fantasy land, but I can dream....actually, I will go do that now.

'night.

Tammy, when a person has been up day and night for about 7 days, losing one litter entirely and almost losing the mama and babies in another litter and having to do round the clock 15 minutes checks to make sure you are not losing mama makes a person rude sometimes that might have otherwise been compassionate. Then to get on here and see the ignorance of some people. I guess I am trying to say, it is hard enough for someone expereinced to breed and go thru things much less someone that doesn't have a clue but has a male and female dog so they would like to "breed".