Thank you all very much for the posts- it is sad to know that others have dealt with suicide (this is the second one we have had, the first one was 19yrs ago, when he was 18)...
It was a beautiful service, since his girlfriend was from the Objibua tribe (sorry for the spelling on that) she had some of her tribe come, and a "medicine man" they did a ceremony on the drums, and he explained what every song ment - four songs for the four directions (north, south, east and west) (we are all white, including my uncle who passed, and had no idea- and it was so nice of him to explain) for them they believe that the soul has a 4 day journey, and each time someone cries, they stop and turn around to look- everyone tried hard to stop their tears, but it was too difficult.
Some family did not come, because they feel the family is disgraced... it was their loss, and I will not be able to look at them the same way again.
then we had a pastor do a service, and I loved it because he stated many areas in the bible where biblical (sp) people did wrong, but still went to heaven.... but he also stated "no one can judge (uncle) for what he did, until we have walked in his shoes, we have no way of knowing what he was going through" and went on to say that "his god would never turn away from someone who is in the state of mind a person is when they take their own life" .... " it is the lowest point of dispair a person could be in"
Hopefully the message got through to those who have been so judging and talking so bad about (uncle) that has caused a lot more grief for the family.
I learned a lot about the indian way also, and that whole drum things was so peaceful, and I smiled knowing that at least (uncle) was finding some spirituality before he passed away.
He was going to get an indian name when he got married..... (he is white)
now please don't take any of this post to be about religion, or race... it isn't, the only reason race was brought up was to explain why we didn't know indian ways.... and religion was only brought up, because it was part of the ceremony yesterday..... it isn't to discuss which way is right or wrong, because yesterday, two different ways of life were brought into one, it was beautiful... and what (uncle) would of wanted.
(uncle)- replaces my uncles name that passed, I don't feel right about sharing it for personal reasons.
Sat. is the burial, the ending to this week, plus.. long journey, hopefully people will start to open their eyes and give (uncle) the respect he deserves, and be there for the burial.
I can't thank you all enough for the support and posts, and for sharing difficult things also on this thread.... it does give a person peace to know that people know what you are going through.... thank you all from the bottom of my heart... my family thanks you also. |