[Ashley V]

Originally Posted by celstu1

Everything you have done in your life has led you to the person you are today. Even if it was something horrible, you turned out to be a wonderfully loving, caring person.

I am 32 years old. About 13 years ago I did something I was VERY ashamed of. Its not that horrible to others I'm sure and I've long been forgiven and I've forgiven myself. I was young and angry at the time. My parents divorced when I was 18, my mom initiated it and I was such a daddys girl. I was soo mad at my mom for breaking my family apart. Very very angry. I moved out with my dad and went to my moms work to tell her the day I did it so when she got home I was gone. About 6 months later, my mom had a problem with my current boyfriend and she forbid my boyfriend in her house. A week later she had a hysterectomy. My youngest brother lived with her in the house we grew up in. I did NOTHING to help her. NOTHING. She was in pain after having surgery and I didn't help with driving my little brother to football or work, I didn't do any grocery shopping or even call to ask how she was doing.

Thats HORRIBLE! I lived with that for years.

I had to learn to let it go. My mom forgave me and Ive forgiven myself. I now know my mom did what she had to do, I understand now that Im older and more mature. Back then I was just a angry kid who didnt understand at all.

I have made my life motto to NEVER do anything I will regret or feel ashamed to tell someone else. This is such an easy motto to live by. I have no secrets (not that I tell the world my life). Even things that were not the smartest for me to do I no longer regret it. Why? Because I did it. At the time I did it knowing what I was doing. It forces me to make better daily decisions for myself, so I don't have to have any regrets or shame later down the road. Not to mention, it seems that every action has a reaction, even if its 20 years later it can creep back up.

Forgive yourself and move on with your life... its too short to have regrets and shame weighing you down.