Quote:
Originally Posted by C C Kent  First the Bad News
You can change behavior but you can't change temperament. It sounds like you have a combination of the two. Most breed standards, either expressly or by implication, direct the removal of the shy temperament from the program. It's so important that it is one of the few aesthetic traits that warrant removal on it's own, normally it takes three to cause removal. But in these days the standard seems unimportant so we get many more puppies with shy temperament. Since your breeder admits she doesn't have the time to spend socializing the puppies the good news is even better.
The Good News
The Neural Pathways in your puppy's brain are still under construction and you can affect how they progress from this point. Contrary to some advice it will be helpful to take the puppy to loud places with new things and not offer comfort. This might sound mean but which is worse, protect her now and sentence her to a life of fear? or expose her now and set her free? Her startle/recovery reflex and her ability to soothe herself on her own is very important. Holding her a lot is fine as long as you don't pick her up to soothe her when she is afraid. Let anyone pet her that wants to and if possible slip them a treat in advance so that she associates good things coming from unexpected places. When at home use an "umbilical cord" to attach her to you at all times unless she is in her crate. This will end the "she won't come to me" problem immediately and is a helpful potty training aid as well. Most of all never....ever...treat her unless she does what you want. Encourage her but do not make excuses for her, she deserves a life free from fear and you can give it to her. Good Luck!!  |
That is true... if you hold her and cuddle her when she is afraid, then she'll think "Oh so if I act afraid, I'll get attention" BUT only to a certain extent.
I'll share one of my own personal stories. Smokey was abused and left in a crate for his first 6 months of life and we were his 5th home at 6 months old. One of the things he was very afraid of was me kissing the top of his head. The first time I did that, he ran with his tail tucked right under the bed and would NOT come out. I worked with him for 30 minutes to get him to come out. He was petrified. When I finally got him out, I held him and talked really soft, slowly stroking his body. He was shaking all over. I held him close. After that day he slowly got more and more used to it. Now I can hold his head and kiss him all I want. Sometimes he'll even back out, but not out of fear... instead he puts his butt in the air, with his tail wagging 100 mph, and bark at me, then run over and give me kisses all over my face. It took a lot of repetitive but patient trials, but we worked through it.
I think the best thing to do is moderation. Sometimes cuddle and hold her, but don't over do it or she will continue to be afraid. Don't just ignore it and act rough with her cause that could also cause her to be more afraid.