[nydia]

I have been friends with Jasmine since elementary school, we met when we were both in the 5th grade and have been friends ever since. Jasmine use to be Omar, she is a transgendered individual, when we were growing up Jasmine was a boy, she was raised with her mother and grandmother no father figure around, but both her mother and grandmother were religious women and Jasmine as Omar was a good boy, she went to school and went to church, but since she was little we all knew she was going to be how she is now she never wanted to play with my brothers, she always wanted to play with my sisters and I with our barbies.

Anyway...
I come from a big strong loving family and a very open family, they welcome any and everybody, I was brought up not to judge people, you just don't know the next persons story to make judgements and that is how we were with Jasmine we just excepted her as she was. When Jasmines grandmother died, Jasmines mother had a break down and went on drugs and for Jasmines whole entire high school years she lived with us with my mother and I. We love Jasmine, she is family to us, but really to me she is my best friend, but recently we have not been in touch and that is my fault or so that is how I feel.

Jasmine recently started hanging with new people and those new people got her on drugs, I have a funny feeling she has been using coke or something stronger. Thing is Jasmine was on drugs before, when she first started her transition she couldn't handle the ridicule from outsiders and she started popping pills, I told her I didn't agree and we always ended up arguing over her drug use until eventually she went to rehab. She was okay for about 2 years, now that she has new friends she is back on drugs. I have always supported her but I don't want to be her enabler, I feel if I except her as she is now, high on drugs, without letting her know my feelings then I am enabling her to keep going, but if I do say something she won't come around or even call. I haven't heard from her in almost two weeks I ring her phone and no answer, I send her emails and no answer, I'm worried about her and that is another thing that makes me want to give up, I worry to much and what if something does happen to her, will it be my fault for not trying harder to reach her??? I already feel powerless she won't listen to me and get the help she needs and leave the people she be with alone so what do I do? do I let a friend go of over 20 years and just give up or do I hang in there and fight for her because she can't fight for herself???