Ok so last night I bit the bullet and put her in the crate all night. I got some sleep, she yelled a lot, she had pooped in the crate when I got up to see about her at 3:50 AM. That will happen at first I know, then hopefully she will get it. I just know that a king size bed with me was too much space at night until we learn to hold it or signal we need to go. I think I was setting her up for failure to avoid the confrontation of the crate. She messed in the bed about 5 times altogether, so I went back to square one where I should have been all along. At least she didn't throw up. I'm going to do the two baby gates today until I can get to the X-pen place.
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