Oh my gosh Missy, I'm so sorry to hear that you are being invaded like that. My first thought is the polite approach as well but given what you have said about her children and their significant lack of manners and compassion for your pups and your things.....I don't think that your cousin will hear what you are requesting. If her kids are such hellions then she obviously doesn't instill in them respect and gratitude, therefore I don't think she will respond well to an approach with kindness and respect. JMO. But I agree with the first post below yours and you need to be very direct with her and tell her (don't ask....tell her) what you need/want. She has not asked you, she has just taken over your home when she wants to. You may cause some riffs in the family yes, but it is either that and let it sort out or you continue on the way it is.....which isn't healthy for you or your pups. Be direct, tell her that you insist that she tell you when she is planning to come by so that you can see if it fits with your schedule and don't rearrange your schedule for her. Like someone else said, give her the days and times she can come visit, make sure your body language conveys how serious you are about this and I also agree you should keep your doors locked. I would abstain from saying anything specific about her children's behavior......but present it this way....these are the rules in my home, when you are here you must abide by my rules, when you are in my home I AM THE BOSS PERIOD! Sit those little monsters down and their mom too. It won't be easy but you will feel SO much better once you have done it. If you offend her, say it wasn't your intention (even though she has offended you time and time again)....your intention was to have a happy home that everyone can enjoy.....you, your cousin, her kids, your dogs, your hubby, everyone and to have that happy home it needs to be run a certain way....with respect.
Let us know what you decide and how it goes. Put your foot down....we are all behind you 100%. |