Wendy.. I am just checking in to see how you are doing right now..please take care of yourself.. I know it is so much easier said then done..
Do you live in the country.. I am thinking you need to get a new baby to make you feel that you have something to get up for.. I know we are all different.. some cannot bear the thought.. I personally would need a new baby for a distraction.. some one to cuddle and love and keep me busy from thinking..
I also want you to know I lost a 5 year old that fell off the bed she slept on for three years.. just a freak.. I was guilt ridden also.. then I lost a 5 year old when the vet gave him his needles.. same on he had a reaction to the year before.. at the time.. I did not think it was up to me when his chart was ever so tiny.. he had not been a sick dog.. so I left it to the vet to know what he was doing.. again the guilt I wore.. I learned that now I tell my vet what to do and what not to do..
But getting a new yorkie each time.. was all that saved me and kept me going.. for I wanted to die inside..
If you live in the country and get a new baby to love.. make a sheltered gated area. I know my friend in florida does this.. and she made a roof for it also..
Not sure if I helped you or not.. but have been thinking about you so much...sending prayers and big hugs..anne |