I want to apologize if I upset anyone!
But I can't help but to think of my dad today
You see.. My dad died 9 years ago the day after Valentine's Day.
I never really "knew" him..
See he and my mom split up when I was a little kid... He did come visit me.. but that's never enough..
The reason they split was because he had an alcohol problem and my grandpa didn't want him near us. I remember the times I spent with him (both good and bad)(he was NEVER EVER abusive) and it makes me so sad.. not only that I didn't spend enough time with him.. just they way I treated him
Well, when he died.. I couldn't care less.. but after a couple years.. it just hit me more and more..
My dad's gone.. I can't bring him back.... whatever type of person he was.. he was my father.. he helped give me life.. and now he's gone... and what did I do?!!! I'm so ashamed of myself!!!! I don't think anyone understands!!!!
I was driving home from work today and Mariah Carey's new song ByeBye came on.. I was bawling my eyes out!... If you haven't heard it.. please listen to it.. it's a beautiful song, truly!
All I want to say as a 20 year old.. is:
Anyone who hasn't talked to their dad's for whatever reason.. think about it:
Is it really worth it??? Maybe you won't miss him today.. or tomorrow.. but in time... you will see.. he meant so much to you (even if he wasn't there)
If you have your father.. cherish him.. tell him you love him.. even if he doesn't say it back.. he does loves you.
Again, I am really sorry if I upset anyone.. but I haven't talked to anyone about it other than my bf.. and it makes me sad...
You all are like a second family to me and I hope you understand