When I adopted Charlie (11 yo, male) last year, he had demodex and was being treated with Ivermectin. His was an immune system deficiency and probably carried it for quite a few years without being properly diagnosed. His previous owner had him treated for allergies and he was given steroids which activates the mites. A diagnosis is simple, scraping of various parts of the body. Also, he was given fish oil to help with his coat, quality food (Orijen and Evo wet food), no grains at all.
This condition is not the end of the world, but are merely mites (we carry mites on our skin also). Take time to read on the internet
http://www.marvistavet.com/html/body...tic_mange.html and it will help you not be frightened.
Demodex does not pass to other animals or human. You do have to watch them carefully to make sure it doesn't reappear. Ivermectin is dropped into their mouth, very bitter but works. I don't believe in dipping because you involved their "private areas".
Good luck and a good vet will help guide you. It is true that some dogs do not survive and have to be put down.
Just remember, no steroids.
Warmly, Deborah