Sorry to hear about the situation with the boyfriend.
There are a bunch of government programs available for first time home buyers....check
www.hud.gov
Also see if you can find a nice home in which the seller is offering "seller assist". The seller assist can pay for basicall ALL closing costs. Most mortgage companies allow anywhere from 3 to 6% sellers assist. With the home industry being what it is, many sellers will offer this option.
You might be able to find a mortgage lender that offers a no down or an 80/20 mortgage. An 80/20 mortgage is actually 2 mortages in which one is for 80% and the other is 20%. The advantage is there is no PMI (private mortgage insureance requried) and you don't have a down payment (or a small down payment on an 80/15 loan (5% down) ).
Very good friends of ours just bought a home a few months back. Cost was about $275,000. Their TOTAL out of pocket was under $4000. Seller's assist paid all closing costs and they got a no money down mortgage. The $4000 was needed to prepay the property taxes in PA (your state may have different requirements).
Also note, the tax part of the equation. If you find a nice house with low taxes (say under $1000), YOUR out of pocket could be very very low.......
Meet with a good realator & mortgage broker. They may be of great help.
Good luck