[SarahandElisha]

Some background:

Jesse is a 16 month old rescue dog. I've had him for just over a week. He is a calm, timid, frightened dog who lacks human socialization. He was rescued by the ASPCA from a puppymill. He was a breeder dog and was kept in a crate all day and all night with no love and no human interaction. He was placed in a home in San Diego by the foster home he was with. His adopted family's home was lost in the fire and Jesse ended up back at the shelter. I found him and promised him a forever home. Over the past week my boyfriend and I have given him tons of love and affection. He was really starting to come out of his shell. By day 3 he was no longer making in the house, except for marking (we plan to get him neutered, which will hopefully help with marking). He was loving his walks, and was really adjusting well. He loves his crate and has slept through the night every night.

Two nights ago, I took him for a walk to return some DVDs to Blockbuster while my boyfriend cleaned up after dinner. He was getting amazing at walking on leash. If I walked ahead while he was busy sniffing, he would come running to catch up. He stopped and waited to cross the street with me. He listened to the "come" command we have been practicing. He was being so good that I forgot to do my part. I became distracted and lost in thought. All of a sudden, Jesse pulled the lease out to it's maximum length. The handle flew out of my hand and smacked into the pavement. Jesse is a timid dog and the sound of the plastic lease handle hitting the concrete sent him into a panic. He started speeding away from me. The noise of the lease dragging behind him only frightened him more and he was bolting in the opposite direction. The only thing going through my head was that I had to get that lease back in my hands. I started chasing him, calling his name. The "come" command he was getting so good at was useless in the heat of the moment. He would not stop, and was running faster than me, gaining more and more distance. I dropped the DVDs I was carrying, I threw my purse into a bush. I didn't care. All I could think about was Jesse. Finally, he ran onto a patch of grass. The lease didn't make noise being dragged across grass, and Jesse slowed down to a trot. "Come!" I yelled out. Jesse took a couple of timid steps towards me and I was able to catch the leash handle. He was shaking uncontrollably. I sat on the grass holding and petting him for a few minutes before going to find my purse and the DVDs, which thankfully were still there, tossed on the ground about 200 yards away around the corner. I carried Jesse home in my arms, crying the whole way. I was so irresponsible! Such a bad owner. Thankfully I have the greatest boyfriend in the whole world. He always manages to say the right things and calm me down. Once home, Jesse calmed down and curled up by our feet in front of the fireplace.

All of yesterday, and this morning, Jesse has been so frightened of the outdoors! He's fine right outside of our apartment, on the side street, but refuses to move, backs into a corner, and shakes uncontrollably by the main streets, or when a human or dog walks by. He was making so much progress! He was getting to the point where he was excited to see people and dogs! I feel like I set him back so far. I've started to take him out to the side street and let him explore for a few minutes. As soon as I sense that he is getting anxious, I carry him to the secluded, quiet park near my apartment and sit on a bench with him, simply letting him sit by me and explore slowly at his own pace. Last night was the first night that he whined in his crate.

I know there is no quick fix and that I just have to accept that we've taken a few steps back and will have to start working at it again, but I just feel horrible and knew that everyone here would understand.

Sorry for the long post,

Sarah