I feel sorry for you and for her too. I have a sister who is a recovering alcholic and I can't even tell you what she (we) went thru for so long. She hid her drinking so well and her family (husband and kids) hid it too, that we never knew how bad it really was until she almost killed herself. She lost jobs, couldn't get a job, totalled a car in the middle of the day, had her license revoked and so on and on....it was AWFUL. But the worst thing was that I was so afraid that I was going to lose my sister who I loved so much to something that had such a strong hold on her that she wouldn't listen to anyone. We talked to "experts" (I worked at a hospital that had a substance abuse program, but I worked in the ICU, so knew nothing about it), staged an "intervention" which still gives my mom nightmares. It was HORRIBLE. My sister unwillingly went thru a 28 day inpatient program and came back home only to immediately start drinking again (if she really ever stopped). She went thru another program and another. None of them worked and she was lucky that she had great insurance thru her husband's job. She finally, somewhere along the line, got tired of feeling the way she did and she stopped drinking on her own. I don't know how she did it, but she did. I guess you just have to be at that point where you hate where you're at, and commit to doing something about it. I don't know of any free, or even low cost programs though. Even if she got into trouble, and a court sent her to a county or city run program, you still have to pay for those. I don't know how they work it, but I have a friend who was ordered to one (it was basically there or spend a couple of years in jail) and he had to pay as he went along. He did great I think in it though. AA isn't for everyone and you don't have to believe in God per se; you just have to believe in a "higher power" I think. I pray that your friend sees that she's being self destructive and does something to change her life for the better now while she's young and not waste her life or make decisions she'll regret for the rest of her life. You're a good friend to be so concerned, but she's got to want it for herself. Good luck!
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Originally Posted by SladesMommy  She doesn't have insurance that I know of. In fact I'm almost certain she doesn't cause she usually won't go to the doctor even if she is really sick and based on the jobs her parents do,, I don't think they would have insurance that covers her either.
I *think* if a free/cheap in patient place could be found that she would check herself in. I know she has looked for some, and so have I.
The only ones I've found in GA that have financial aid are all near atlanta and only serve the counties up there.
Her cycle of abuse is she'll have a major happening - for example - falling down and blackening her eye and scratching up her face and NOT remembering the next day what the heck happened, even after we have told her no memories will come back according to her. Then after something bad or embarrassing has happened she'll do really good for a few wks not drink (at least I don't see her drinking) and really try to find and get help, then she'll convince herself (and try to convince me) that it was a one time thing.. she was just upset that her boyfriend brokeup with her, guys were buying her drinks so she wasn't keeping up with how much she'd had, etc and that it won't happen again. Then she'll start drinking some at her apartment but not drinking out, then she'll start drinking out again and lately the past few times we have gone out it has been a disaster. So much so, that I have refused to continue going out with her.
Its at the point i'm tired of dealing with her BUT I know if I don't help her, no one will because it seems to me that no one else will recognize she has a problem. |