I'm trying to not get too mushy but I HAVE to say Thank you again to all you awesome Yorkie people.....
Sunday was the first day of Autumn and also marked one month since I found my husband had died & it feels like just yesterday.
My guilt has been enormous because I woke up within minutes of him passing and keep thinking IF I had known or woken up sooner I could have revived him but I'm trying very hard to move past that. I have no memory of that night other than finding him and maybe that's a good thing but it bothers me that my mind blocked it out...I know people go thru worse in the world everyday but this truly has been the hardest and saddest month of my life. I miss him so much my heart just hurts. BUT - with the support I've received I can honestly say that you all have been a blessing in my life and I truly thank each of you from the bottom of my heart.
I've been trying to answer each and every person who pm'd, emailed & called me.... I also thank those those who sent cards & those who sent donations - you all just blew me away with your support. It's thanks to those donations that I did finally go see a doctor to get something to help the Raw emotion and to help me sleep & it seems to be working - the last 2 nights I was finally able to sleep without crying and laying there dwelling.
Then there's Jeannie and Paula who came to his funeral in Michigan - Jodie who came to the families house after the funeral with heartfelt gifts for the girls (hugs) and also to Jamie and her husband who took such great care of my girls while I was gone for the weekend for the funeral-
To Linda - (fufu fashions) Your visit with food and picking me up at the airport is so appreciated -
how can I every say thank you all properly for this ?
My life will change and I'll move on....I know it will get easier in time and for those who asked what my plans are - right now I'm taking it one day at a time - staying busy sorting and going thru our 12 years together because I do feel I'll have to move as financially I don't think I can afford this house. I'm planning to sell what I can and give the rest to the Salvation Army but it's just overwhelming on some days.....Other days I really work hard.
The girls are doing a little better but Cheri has a hard time when I have to leave the house. She was so used to having her 'daddy' here that she just gets hysterical when I have to go out but I'm working with her...Tessa (my cocker) still cries in her sleep but seems to be much better - I think their little sleepover at Jamies (yorkiecrazy) house did her a world of good - she'd been mourning harder than my yorkie girls....She had never left my husbands side when he got sick so she took it the hardest.
the upside is - my youngest son wants to move in with me. He has some personal stuff to take care of but I hope he can move back home with me soon - he needs me and I need him.
There's alot more going on but I don't want to bore everyone - I just wanted to do a post again and thank ALL the great Yorkie People that I've been blessed to get to know online and in person. You've all just been so great I can't thank you enough.....We really ARE a big family and you're all so special to me I just had to do another Thread to say this.
for those that I haven't written yet - it's been hard to be on the computer so I do a little each morning and I HOPE I dont accidentally miss someone - if you haven't heard from me yet - please forgive me....there are some days I can't type but I'm trying really hard to get 'me' back.
Sorry this was so long - but I HAD to say it again - Yorkie people are just the best .... you all have been awesome and I wish I could hug each of you in person.
Thank you again for all your support - I'll never forget it - EVER.