This is very long - sorry !!!
Thank you all for being as sweet as you all are - I just did a HUGE post that took me 45 minutes to write and somehow lost it
- it seems things are just going that way lately so I'm trying to write it again, my eyes are really blurry so please excuse any typos -
I have so many things swirling thru my mind and am running on fumes but I do want to thank you all and let you all know that I WILL write each of you who emailed - called & pm'd me, but I'm just not sure when I'll be able to yet.
I did get on YT to try to catch up on things but I just can't yet - I did a Post in Off Topic (in the thread by Crystalsmom) to say thank you SO Much for all your kind words and condolences
(Your Cards were just beautiful as are you all) ....but in in my other post, I went a little too far by bringing up someone who makes it her lifes mission to be hateful, (it did NOT happen here) !!!! I wasn't in my right mind when I posted- but wanted to clear the air and tell the truth about what many people saw - It was just too mean & vicious for words ...but it wasn't the time or place to me to say anything- so for that I DO apologise - to Admin - Sorry to you too,
I do NOT want anyone to be worried. I'm not coping well and HAD thought I was a stronger person than this but I WILL be ok. I don't want to be a big baby on the phone but my main problem is missing him so much.
Even though he was sick a long time I just wasn't ready for this, Add the lack of sleep and I can't sit still for more than 5 minutes makes me wonder if I'm totally losing what's left of my little mind so to keep busy I've gone completely crazy cleaning and sorting out things that I know I'll need to do.... I guess the restlessness does have a bonus side to it, my house has never been cleaner
I've been working from 5:30am till whatever time I pass out - (LITERALLY lol) and I don't dring if that tells you anything. The only times I stop is to talk on the phone and even them I'm doing something with my left hand so I'm not really taking breaks. The girls are getting the TLC breaks and loveing it - I do feel bad for them though...they know I'm really upset and have been a little stressed themselves too - having accidents - throwing up and in general watching me like 3 little Hawks - even Tessa who didn't used to care where or what I was doing.
To Lynda- fufuFashions - you are a riot - I've never been watched like that while eating and didn't fool you one trying to be slick did I ?? but thank you so much for bringing it and it was so nice meeting you -
and Jodie - I'll so be looking forward to meeting you when I go to MI for the funeral with his family
To (Dr.) Jamie and Kelly (Yorkiecrazy) - Again - you guys are just the best - having good friends can make us forget out problems even if only for a short time but seeing you and what you did for me will NOT be forgotten - Thank you SO MUCH for keeping all three dogs for me when I do go to the funeral -I'm so worried about Tessa but the girls love you - and when I saw Chanel kissing Kelly I knew they'll be in great hands - besides me sons that's the first man she's kissed and you all who were here can testify - my girls are HUGE kissers LOL.....and ps - I'm doing the Epsum salts - it seems to be helping although my foot looks like someone blew up a latex glove without inflating the fingers
When I get back to my old self MAYBE I'll share the few stories about my new places to crash out sleeping in my house - I did have a scare last night and will no longer be doing anything but trying to sleep when I feel I'm exhausted - I learned THAT lesson last night and I am trying to slow down.
and a word to all - CHERISH those you love. I know many times we think the grass is greener or we wish we could say goodbye to end our problems - but I'm here to say it only hurts like nothing else...make the most of those you do love
Thanks again to everyone and big hug to each of you. I've been so touched all I seem to do is cry but when it comes to my friends and even those I've just met - it's good crying.
I just love this site - and to my friends who don't really post here - same goes to you too.