I must have missed a previous post because I am sort of confused - the land belonged to your husband's family for 20 years but you bought it from your parents? How did that come about?
I don't think you have any choice but to get an attorney & licensed surveyor to take care of this for you. It either belongs to you or it doesn't. I hope your neighbor is wrong but even if he isn't, you really need to get it straightened out.
Try to just give it to the professionals to handle and not get all upset about it. God bless.
