 Thank you!
I was just reading all the post and I wanted to thank you all for your warm thoughts. They are greatly appreciated.
I'm still having a hard time. I was okay while at work but as soon as I got home I broke down. My 11 yr old had a pic of her on my computer and thats when I lost it. I didn't want to make him feel bad but after a few hours I asked if I could change the picture. He asked why? and I said because mommy is feeling a little sad right now and he totally understood and said its okay mommy you can change it. I'm feeling so empty like I want to crawl in a corner and never come out. I didn't even want to come home from work because I knew my girl wouldn't be looking out the window when I got home but then I started to think I have a family that needs me and Timmy & Mimi need me too. Although Timmy & Mimi are so independant and are always doing their thing they have been extra affectionate towards me today and that makes me happy.
I'm also having a hard time with where she is buried. I haven't been to my backyard yet and really do not want to go back there because I know she is back there and I know I can't hold her or kiss her. I really wish she wasn't back there. My fiancee did a great job...he told me he buried her underneath the HUGE beautiful wheeping willow tree. Ever since I bought my house I fell in love with that tree...I always use to say how it felt like paradise standing underneath it. Now my favorite tree is not so much my favorite tree anymore because I know my girl is there. Gossshhh this is terrible.
Again, thanks for all the support. I'm thinking about taking some time from here but I also think about all the support you guys give me. If I do leave for a little bit I know you all will understand. Love you all! |