*From "It's Okay to Cry" Warm, compassionate stories that help you find hope and healing after the death of your beloved pet.
1. In the journal, I wrote everyday for 15 minutes, even on those days that I didn't feel like writing.
2. I wrote in longhand, not computer.
3. Began either with the phrase "I remember" or "I feel".
4. Write about the good times you had together with you pet. Write about the bad times. Write about death.
5. Write without stopping for a full fifteen minutes. Keep your hand moving at all times.
6. Whenever you run out of things to say, begin again with the phrase "I remember" and keep writing.
7. Write without thinking. Give free rein to your emotions and feelings.
8. Keep writing through the tears. Don't stop.
9. Don't worry about spelling or grammar. Just write and keep it private until you want to share.
For me, writing was my salvation. However, during the writing I found that I came to a place where I wrote about my mother dying, loss of another pet, my cancer, feelings that had been languishing because I am very stoic, protector of my grown children, etc.
I also framed a picture of Sophie when she was five and her coat was full length, and just a few months before her death. She is the background on my cell phone (the picture in my avatar). Adopting sweet Charlie was a tribute to Sophie because I was so worried about her being ill, 13 yo. and who would take care of her if something happened to me. I want Charlie to live out his remaining years in a safe home surrounded with love; his foster Mom promised she would take care of him if there was the need ie I am too sick (hope that never happens).
Someone suggested a scrapbook which is a great idea. It is such a murky time when they first leave us, and I am glad that I kept all of her belonging. Her coat, leash and collar still hang in the laundry room.
I am sure you will have many responses and some wonderful ideas. Most of all, just let the tears come and sob - literally.
Take care, Deborah (Keep writing and know that I am here to help you through this time). |