[Papi]

Amber Iv,

May I please say how very sorry I am for the difficult situation you find yourself in, the turmoil, the stress, and anxiety can be unbearable, it's is a heart wrenching place to be, I can sincerely empathize with you as I just faced this decison last week, Friday the 30th of March, 3:10 P.M. - I had to let my 7 year/3 month, 4# dear and precious Yorkie go, and I felt such guilt, as if I had killed her, it was awful, the most horrible thing I have ever done in my life or for that matter ever had to do, I never killed a thing in my whole life, much less have to do this to my Kassie Kisses who I loved so dearly, so very much, and held so close to my heart, she was a part of me, an extension of me if you will, I'm a retired widower and as such we went, did everything togeather, we were in fact as one.

Amber Iv, her downfall was an irreversable kidney disease diagnosed back in July, 2007 and the medication precribed for her seemed to help, held back the onslaught, ravages of this disease temporarily, then in February it this year came in on her with full force, again did everything I could to help her, prolong her life, had her kidney's flushed, similiar to dialasis, and vet prescribed another 6 medications, this all worked for a few day's but it was really to late to be of much help at this point, she stopped eating, layed curled up in a ball 24/7, incontinbent set in, she could hardly stand, staggered when attempting to walk, it was unbearable to continue watching her suffer this way, I was hoping upon hope I would wake in the mornings, and see she has passed on her own, it didn't work out that way sadly, I know she was aware that she was dying, how did I discern that, they say dogs don't talk, though they in fact do in their own way, and she did by wanting to be constantly curled in my lap, or held in my arms, her nose buried in the crook, she simply had no spirit, life left in her, and when she would just stare into my eyes, yes her eyes told the story,I knew at this point, she was saying to me, Grandpa, please if you truly love me, please, please let me go, don't ever think you are killing me, Papi you are in fact showing me how much you do, and have loved me, my life, our lives have been fulfilling, happy and we sure did have a lot of fun togeather, now be courageous like a Yorkie, do the right thing by me, for us, LET ME GO.

On Friday, March 30, 2007 at 3:10 p.m. I reluctantly, sadly, and tearfully showed kassie how much I loved her more than myself, I did as she wished, let her go, I LOVED HER

I can only add the caring, loving Vet's I have used for years have a special sitting,memorial room for these matters, decorated warmly, a few candles here and there with inside water fountains, and table with comforter to lay your pet in it's final moments, not that it is any easier, Kassie layed there comfortably, I petted her, cuddled her, spoke of our many happy day's togeather as I tearfully cried over her, we looked lovingly, appreciatively, intently into one anothers eyes, and she peacefully left me, I her.

Yes, it was the most difficult thing I ever did, but couldn't bear to watch Kassie suffer any longer on my account.

I DID NOT KILL HER
I LOVED HER

Amber the decision is difficult, and one only you can make of course, my thoughts, prayers are with you, if it helps any, you are not killing your precious one, you are showing your love.

Papi