Venting again Chubby Prejudice
 

Ya know i am tired of the chubby prejudice that goes on in this world. We wonder why our young children are developing eating disorders but hello the media shoves down our throat that we must be thin to be "beautiful". Then there is the clothing industries oh yeah they make plus size clothes but most of them ARENT VERY CUTE i am 26 and i usually have a choice between something that looks like an 80 yr old would wear it or something a 16yr old would wear. I know 200 lbs is bigger than average and I DONT CARE i deserve to be treated like anyone else no matter how much i weigh.

I agree with you. A person shouldn't be treated because of the way they look on the outside. Its what is inside that counts. I am sorry that you were treated like this.

Just remember....Recon Preslee Memphis and I still luv ya cause you are part of our YT family. :) :)


Did you smile at least, cause that was what i was going for?? If not, SMILE DAMN IT!!!!

Yeah i smiled...doesnt get to me like it used to just get on a soap box occasionally.

Oh i know, I get on my soap box more than I should I think. So have at it. I just wanted to make ya smile. Thats all.....


Carry on...........LOL

Angie, I understand how you feel more than you may think. Im also over weigh. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. If I happen to say that Im not feeling well, everyone tells me the same think, Loose weight and you will feel better. I wish it was that simple. Im even considering to have a gastric bypass surgery done. Dont pay attention. You are so rite we all deserve to be treated like anybody else. What it counts is the inside not the outside. Anytime you need to vent, im here.

Thanks Marie its good to vent. I had the vertical banded gastroplasty done 2yrs ago in june and have lost 75lbs it helps but now i have been diagnosed with bursitis in both of my hips. guess i was heavy for too long we are going to try physical therapy but if that doesnt work i have to get steroid shots.

I know! When I go into some stores and look at the clothes, all I can think is that I will look like my grandma's couch if I were to wear some of the things! Big girls are beautiful too! I'm just glad that there are some companies that have wised up and are offering trendy clothes in sizes that will fit people like me. I look cute again! I know it's not healthy, but I will always be big.

And I think that some people don't understand that it's not as easy for us to do things like exercise because of our weight. It is a double bind. We want to be thin, but it's hard to do the things we need to in order to be thin. That makes people depressed. When a lot of womyn are depressed, they eat. That makes us bigger, and thus more depressed. And then your told you are too fat, which makes you depressed. UGH!

And I hate getting looks at the lake because I am a bigger girl in a swimsuit! It's not like I'm in a string bikini! I'm wearing more than most people there, and refuse to wear a t-shirt. It's just a little chub people!

Wow, I didn't realize this was going to be that long. Sorry but I got on a roll ;)

I am in total agreement on this one. There are high metabolisms that some are blessed with and not so high metabolisms and it is alot in what cards you were dealt. Your genes. It is so unfair to assume that someone who is overweight is "bad" or overeats or what ever. That is such a prejudiced way to think.

There is weight prejudice in business, in schools and everywhere in society and it isn't fair. I have three girls and I was always paranoid that they would develop an eating disorder. I have been lucky so far. They are beautiful girls and I am so proud of them. I want them to be fit and healthy but not obsessed with body image and weight.

The current celebrity trend of "you can't be toooo thin" is disgusting to me. Those women do not look healthy. It's so scary! :thumbdown

I agreed. Is like if your not spagetti thin you are not consider pretty. I have heard many times, "you have such a pretty face if you loose weight you will be so beautiful". I hate that so much. Just beacuse im not thin im not pretty. Oh well, this is me.
I hate to go shopping cause of it. Everyone looks at you up and down. Cause of it I do most of my clothing shopping online.
Finally there are more trendy clothes in plus sizes.
Well im also dx with chronic depression. And you are so rite when Im very depress I tend to eat. I had control myself a lot cause one time i ate 5 kit kats in one seating and i didnt even notice until I was done.

I completely agree!
The media has a big impact on life and little kids can be very cruel and larger kids are subjected to this which only makes them more of what they are.

When I was in middle school, I weighed 130 at 5'4. It was pretty large for me. My whole entire family is thin. I had zero friends and people who I would befriend were not really my "friends". I was concentrated more on school than anything else because that's all I had to count on. When I got into high school, I was sick of having a double chin and a huge belly so I stopped eating. I would only eat once a day and it was rat-portions. I would pretty much starve myself The media and all the thin celebrities, thin cheerleaders, and thin people in general made me want to be them.

By the time I was 17, I was 5'6 and weighed in at mid 90lbs. I still thought I was fat. So, I cut back even more. I stopped drinking Coke, I stopped eating. The only thing I would eat was rice and soysauce. Or, a roll of French Bread.

I developed anemia, hypo-thyroidism and I am borderline diabetic.

I think I went through that stage where I wanted to fit in. And, it was the media's fault for me. Flipping through those magazines seeing all those girls wearing nice fitted outfits. I pretty much wanted to be them.

Now I'm almost 21 and realize that it's not about image at all. I am 5'7 and weigh in at 110. I finally come to realize that I should love me for me. As my boyfriend puts it.. "you're just happy and well-fed".

that was very well said.. i never knew that Natalie!!

But i have to agree with everyone here.. The Media has so much influence... i used to be toothpick skinny as well.. when i was a freshman in highschool i was 5'0 (still am haha).. and almost 90 pounds wearing a double zero..(talk about ewww skinny).. and when I met my boyfriend (that i'm still currently with today).. and gained a LOT of weight.. my own family kind of disowned me.. my mother would call my a fat pig.. blah blah blah.. i had no friends.. .. these so called friends in high school would only use me for my kindness.. so i too only concentrated on my studies..

now i'm 19 still short at 5'0... but lost weight (from 150 to 115).. and sometimes.. people still never think it's enough.. i know i have some extra skin and pudge.. but i'm happy and that's all that ever matters

all though sometimes it does hurt when i can't wear the sexy clothes my peers wear without getting the .. look :eek:

I completely sympathize. I'm 27 and have battled my weight for years. I go anywhere from a size 10 to a 14/16. I weigh 185 lbs right now and am a size 14. My doctor said that they are now using a BMI chart because the standard government height to weight chart is very inaccurate. According to the gov't chart I should be 110-120 lbs. My doctor said I would be emaciated at that weight due to my build and frame. According to the BMI chart, I should be 140 to 160 lbs.
My dad has always hounded me about my weight. He says my doctor's nuts and that maybe I'd have a boyfriend if I weren't fat. My dad has always been overweight, and he obsesses about it. I know he doesn't mean to hurt me, but the comments are pretty hard to swallow. I probably wouldn't hardly think about my weight it if it weren't for him. It has taught me one thing though....if I ever have kids, I will love them for who they are, not what they look like. And I will tell them that a person's value comes from the kind of person they are, not their body type.
It is the media's fault for our perceptions of what a woman should look like. It's okay for a guy to have a little tummy, but God forbid if a woman isn't rail thin (nothing against thin people--they've been blessed with a great metabolism). And it isn't always the case that an "overweight" person has no self control and can't stop eating. I have relatives that eat several times as much as I do, and they are thin. Genetics certainly play a significant role.
There is so much more to life than what we look like--the world would be a happier the sooner more people realized that and left us "chubby" people alone. :)

LOL!!!! that had me cracking up!!! thanks for the 1st laugh of the day!

I'm sorry that happened. no one should be treated unfairly or different because of how they look. i haven't really met you yet, but you seem like a great person. so i have no reason to judge you any differently, and its the same with everyone else.

ingallsra-there are also the people who can be heavier from genetics. you could eat right, excercise daily, and do all that stuff, and still be heavy. this world today has the wrong idea of a lot of stuff!

I wanted to add something to mine. I happen to be a chubby person. Will i ever have an eating disorder? no probably not. why not?-because i love myself for who i am not what i look like. those people in magazines aren't real. would i love to be thin? absoulty but i wouldn't kill myself to do it. i have a lot of friends only a few of them pushed the "issue" on me. guess what? they're not my friends any more. so over all i'm happy with myself. :)

Deyna & Natalie - I've seen you and your both very pretty ! I can't imagine you having image problems over weight -

Lycansmom....One of my good friends is like you - she goes through the same problems shopping and weight is something always on her mind - I've watched her treated differently by total strangers and it makes me so mad ! It seems women are targeted more than men are and it's VERY unfair.....

I can relate to shopping as I wear a larger size top than average and the "Bigger than a D cup" bras are the UGLIEST things ! You would think the clothing Mfg's would CATER to larger women because skinny really isn't the normal weight in our country - the average woman IS good sized - look around you - you are NOT alone....

We see images on tv of skinny women for clothes but I think THAT trend is changing slowely - there is currently an ad for Hains with normal sized women - made a big debut a few weeks ago - so that's something to be happy about ! It's the same as seeing women in their 20's selling wrinkle cream - what's up with that ? It's crazy !

I think the media is to blame for the obsession in our country to be thin... it's NOT a life or death situation and we really need to remember to make the most of what we DO have and not compare ourselves to what we see on tv - Go to the store and look around - you'll see MANY women out there who are big AND beautiful ....what counts is inside - not the outside...

Good luck to you -

There are several nice stores that cater to the 'upper class'. That is where you can find a nicer fashion. It is a little more pricey, but with discriminating taste and big clearances, a nice wardrobe can be acquired.

http://lanebryant.charmingshoppes.com/homelb.asp

We have a lot of these stores around us (I think Dallas is one of the fattest cities in the nation). Catherine's is another - they sell the same clothes as Dillards, just in human sizes.

I'm with you all. I use to be super skinny, and then I got sick and had to go on meds. Well the pounds just kept adding on, and I really don't eat that much. Maybe a salad for lunch and a small dinner. People just don't see you the same. I'm the same fun loving person I was at 100lbs. My ex-husband even sent my 19 year old son an email saying I heard your mom is fat. What happened to her. She must look like a cow. My son told him off and hasn't heard from him since. I haven't been near this man in over 18 years and he's going to judge me. Atleast I wasn't a child molester like him. That's the reason I left him.

wow! what a jerk. your ex not you. its a good think you left him. how could he say that?? your son must be pretty awsome!

Been on both sides of that fence! When I was young I was 5 feet and weighed 175 pounds, but I was active and limber. Wouldn't take me on the dance team or cheerleading team even though I could do everything the thin girls could do. I was told I just wouldn't look good in the outfits they wore!
I lost the weight, re-tried out for both and then when I made the teams- I QUIT!
Now though, I am too skinny! At 5' 1 I only weight about 90 pounds or so!
Same thing though! All I hear is 'you're too thin', ' do you have an eating disorder', 'you need to put some weight on those bones, you'd look better and feel better' (remember I live in the south, they like meaty women!)
Now, I just tell people that I love them even though they aren't perfect either! And I don't spend my precious time worrying about what weight I should be, I find better things to worry about than my appearance - because guess what? In the end we ALL end up looking exactly the same!
My prayers go out to all of you.

I read in a glamour article about a graduate student of Rice University and her colleague going to a clothing store and wearing "fat suits". They compared who gets better service and latter experience was very disappointing. A sales associate even wondered aloud why the overweight would bother going to a store where their sized aren't carried. :eek:

This hits home because my mom is a lil bit on the chubby side and I have seen sales lady glaring at her for asking assistance to get a bigger size. My ugly side would always show because nobody deserves to be treated that way!!! I know how much my mom has kept trying to loose the extra weight because she's also diabetic. People are just rude and it makes you question how they were brought up. I'm sorry but good manners and respect starts at home.

YEAH RICE UNIVERSITY!

I can definitely relate to you guys by being on the other end of the spectrum. I am really thin but I get judged for it and have a terrible time finding clothes. I used to cry every time I had to buy bras or bikinis or anything. My mom made my clothes for the longest time because I am abnormally proportioned.

I don't think this will apply to many people, but there is a store in Houston (and online) that is a spinoff of Hot Topic called Torrid. They have some really cute things, some t-shirts and pants and things that fit larger sizes and don't look like moomoos.

I always thought it was BS to ignore the larger size market. Big women are some of the most beautiful women out there! One of my big friends calls herself an "Earth mother"... I love that!

I have been in ballet for I dunno how long but I started having distorted body image as well. I was bulemic and anhorexic. I wouldn't eat much and whatever I would eat, I would throw it up. I wasn't even over weight. I was 5'4 at 125 which is like average for my age. I am very muscular, but pretty lean, so my muscle weighs more. But all I saw was the skinny 15 year olds in my company that were like 80 lbs and all I wanted was to be like them. It hadn't occured to me that I was like 4 years older, and had breasts and hormones, ect. I was like that for over 6 months before my best friend caught on and made me stop. I was good at conceiling it. I think while media has a big part in this mess, WE make the choices we make. We have to own up to our choices. Eating too much or not eating enough is a choice. We all have to make responsible choices for ourselves. It's definetely easier said than done but 4 years later, I've owned up to my own choice. Yes I wanted to be like the girls on tv and magazines, but no one put a gun to my head. I think it's easy to use a scapegoat, at least for me it was. Now I realize that if I'm not eating enough during the day (which is always the case) I need to eat more. On the days that I feel very much like eating everything in site, I make a conscious decision not to overeat because I'm depressed or stressed out. Now at 24, I'm finally happy at 5'4'' and 118 lbs. But I think people are beautiful the way they are, just as long as they are healthy.

It amazes me going through and reading all the posts here about eating disorders.. And knowing that I am not alone in this. I too have been through the whole rollercoaster of body image issues. I went through it big time in high school. I looked at all the girls that were tall and stick thin and wanted to be like them because they had all the football players hanging on them and caught the eye of every cute guy. I starved myself for awhile and then I went through the stage of binge eating and throwing up. I was in all the sports in school. I was very into competition sports. Ran cross country and track. Made it to state my junior year, I blew out my knee 3 feet from the finish line and I was in the lead. Doctors told me the reason that I had suffered like that was because my body wasn't getting all the nutrition that it needed.
My dad put me in therapy to get over my body issues and it did work to a certain point. I started eating right. I found out some things about myself in therapy that I never would have known otherwise. My mom had just left my dad and us kids (myself and 3 brothers) and wanted nothing to do with us. She was heavy and I wanted to be nothing like her so what my therapist thought is that that is where all my issues began. I was mad at the world at that time and took it out on myself just because I didn't want to be anything like my mom.
To this day I am very very picky about my body. I still dont like to look at my body in the mirror for too long because I find way to many flaws. It took until about 2 years ago for me to even buy a full length mirror for in my house, and I am almost 30.
I work out like crazy now. But I eat right and I am very very careful about taking care of myself. I am 5'2" and 107 lbs. I think whatever issues you have with your body you may always have. But you have to take care of yourself at the same time you are trying to make yourself happy.
I am sorry for all of those who have had to battle with being rideculed (SP) for thier wieght. Media does play a big part in it. We are all beautiful people and that is what we have to remember.

I was stick thin growing up. My dad would always make me take vitamins to at least help me gain a lil weight or not look so under-nourished (:D). Things started looking up when I hit my teenage years but my weight did fluctuate like crazy. I also went through days not eating anything. I was just water dependent. When I did eat, it was like 4 spoonfuls. When I got married I'd torture him with "Honey, am I fat?" questions. Now that I think about it, I use to ask that every 5 mins.!!!

Now I try to keep a healthy weight because diabetes and high blood pressure runs in the family. My mom went through a week of Coma because her sugar count went up to 500!!! Normal sugar count is 120, I believe. It was scary and the family since then worked with a nutritionist. We were taught about eating small meals every 3 hours. I took care of my mom and prepared the food that she should eat. It was a wake up call. Since then, she's been trying to loose weight and keeping her sugar level in a steady and healthy level.

I applaud everyone who shared. It takes alot to share these things.

I agree pixiepoo. I does take a lot of courage to share. I kept deleting my text because only 2 people know about my eating problems in the past. Now it's 2 and some YT members..It felt good to relate though.

I dont ever share things like that with people. My ex boyfriend who I was with for 2 years didnt even know the whole history of me working out. He just thought that I was a fitness freak.


It does feel really good to be able to relate to people like this though. That is why I shared.

Its not what you see on the outside,but what is in, ;) in the inside :p

Some people judge too much,,,WHy i have no idea,except say they really are not happy with themselves,so they put others down too make them themselves feel good :confused: if you get my drift :eek:

It makes me so happy to see such a strong support group for YT members. This place can be very safe and comforting!

No matter what, we are all beautiful in the eyes of our furbabies :)