Anxiety induced potty accidents. Need help my husband is about ready to throw it in
 

We have had our boy for 4 months now. He is a 5 year old male. So any training we do is more than just a simple follow puppy training guidelines bc we have teach new habits while "unteaching" his old ones. My husband is getting so frustrated with it he's ready to to find him a new home but I'm not ready. So I need some serious training tips so I can turn this around!

Basically, any time we leave the house (no matter the length, even if its just 10minutes) he poops. Either in the house or if we crate him he will go in crate also. He never has accidents when we are home only if we leave. We will take him out to potty before we go but here's the kickers; he knows we are leaving and he will refuse to potty. He will just sit there and stare at us, no Mather how much we try to encourage him to go he refuses. So we put him in his crate, turn on the TV for him tell him we will be back and leave. Whenever we come back home there is always a mess to clean up. I'm sure this is anxiety bc he knows we are leaving and he will start to shake before we leave.

While I don't want to get rid of him I can understand my husband annoyance. We come home from a fun outting, a day at work, from grocery store and the second we open the door we are welcomed with the stinch of poop which is followed up with a 30 minute process of cleaning his cage out, bathing him and drying him. We have a 3 year old daughter to watch during all of this also. so this is very much so a problem to deal with every single time we leave the house.

Problem is, I don't know what else to. We crate him, which localizes the mess but it doesn't stop the problem. I have been told try letting him roam, he still has accidents if we do and frankly we can't keep letting him have accidents through the house bc we live in a rental property.

What do you do for anxiety? How do I fix this before my husband puts his foot down?

Google the puppy apartment ( I just got one for my new puppy) you can use the for adult dogs too. There is a separate area for sleeping and bathroom. How long are you taking him out before you leave? Make sure it's very long, like a half hour walk so he has to go. Also when you leave, don't be emotional in any way, make it very casual.

He is not pooping in the house to spite you, he has abandonment issues and rightfully so, separation anxiety issues and five years worth of who knows what. This pup needs intensive training and love and he needs to feel like he is part of the family, he needs to feel, secure, love and trust and he needs someone who is willing to do that for him and devote the time and energy that he needs to become the pet you want him to be.

Part of my message got cut off.

I really think you need to seek the help of a professional trainer. This pup is a rescue and rescues often require intensive training/retraining and often so do their new owners.

You can come here and ask questions and we will all be happy to give you tips but this pup needs a lot more help than I think we or even you, currently can offer him.

I commend you for taking him in and providing all the medical care you have so compassionately sought for him but his emotional health is just as important and he is letting you know that he is not ok and that hes struggling.

Please for the sake of your pup and keeping him in your family, look in to professional trainers. Reputable Rescue organizations often provide medical and emotional treatment for their pups before they are rehomed, they also make sure that new families are prepared and schooled on how to handle the individual needs of the pups before they are released to their new families, additionally they often continue to support their families when needed. You and your pup weren't afforded those things and this is why I ask that you seek professional help.

Lastly, if your husband does put his foot down please, please do not give him away, release him to a Reputable Yorkie Rescue.

I wish you much luck, I know how hard you are trying, I truly hope everything works out for your family.

Great advice above. Was he strictly outdoor trained in his previous home?

My Teddy had the urge to poop when he thought he was being left home alone (although he has a Yorkie brother, and I was only going outside to work in the yard). He is pad trained, so I would put him in his xpen with the pad and leave for 5 minutes. Then I would come back and take care of the poop, then go outside again. He overcame this nervous habit.

Whatever method of potty training you use, consistency will be key. Use keywords and rewards for good potty. We still throw parties for when the doggies do their business right.

I would advise against free roaming. Restrict his freedom to a smallish area, perhaps a room with a floor that is easy to clean.

I also like the suggestion to exercise him before you leave and keep him outside long enough to potty. The exercise will help wear him out and reduce anxiety.

Training for anxiety: As suggested above, leave without making a big deal. Practice leaving for a few minutes at a time and gradually increase the time. My boys understand "I'll be back." Always use keyphrases. They are so smart and learn these things.

I also agree that your boy needs lots of love and patience. Try not to show frustration or anger, both of which will hinder training big time.

Does your husband have a good relationship with your boy? That is also a big factor.

Best wishes. Keep us updated.

I see he was a rescue, and I agree with Lynzy that he will require extra special care.

Lynzy has some great advice. I would definitely follow through with her suggestions. In the mean time, is it possible for you to gate off a smaller portion of your home like your bathroom or laundry room? This way he has room for his nervous poop without having to lay in it like he does in his crate and you do not have to go on an "egg hunt" so to speak when you return home from outings. Cover the floor of this room with papers or potty pads and this will make your clean up much quicker.

:thumbup: I was thinking the same thing. A smaller area with a tile floor- not carpet- will make clean up faster. Pads covering the area is a great idea too. Use baby gates in doorways if you need to so the area is small.
What I did when mine hit the pad, I'd say how awesome she did and give a treat. Positive reinforcement goes a long way- so does being consistent. A firm NO at the wrong poop spot, then moving her to the pad and saying POOP HERE helps. Don't yell, and don't over do the No. He'll get it, it's just going to take more time and patience. Hang in there!

Thanks for the advice! As much as I want to get him in training classes it's just not in the funds rights now (I'm a teacher for a private school and have no income during the summer :-( ).
He definitely does have abandonment issues. He can be stubborn (but can't all dogs? Lol) but this is directly related to him being left alone. It took me about 2 weeks after getting him to realize this is anxiety from being left alone. Rightfully so indeed.

I want to help him, Im not ready to give up on our handsome little fella. We just can't afford training classes right now. At least until school starts back up.

Do any of you know of some places that may have discounted or free services?

He gets lots of love and attention when we are home. I have read to leave something of my scent with him when we leave since I am the person he "clinges" to the most (basically I'm his favorite in the house lol) do any of you know if that works?

I'm not sure what training he had previously if any. After his neuter I put a puppy pad down for him and he seemed to know to use it but I've since tried that and it hasn't helped any with the messes.

And yes there is a spot I can gate him, ill give that a try :)

Mine has my old robe on her bed, it helps her, I hope. When I start to leave, I give her some cuddles and put her down on her bed. 90% of the time she stays there when I close the door. I have glass on the top 1/2 so I can see what she's doing. I think it comforts her to have that to snuggle on while I'm gone. ( I just looked at my avatar pics- she's had that thing on her bed forever!! That's the blue thing she's on in her pictures! LOL!)

It seems like I read on an older post of another dog with the same issue. Someone suggested that the owner put the pup in the area that they stay when they leave and then go out the door for about 5 minutes and come back. Then, take the pup out to go potty. You may want to try this to see if it works. Fortunately our Anna, also a rescue, has not had this issue. I sat outside with her for hours for the first few weeks that we had her and every time she made a diddle or a doo, I cheered like there was no tomorrow. She was scared of walking in the grass at first because she had lived her first 6 years crate bound. If your baby is going poo in the crate, I would not crate him at all. It is very possible that he was contained in a crate full time before you got him. In this case, he would have been forced to use this area as a potty and sleeping area.

dog
 

Yorkies are so smart. I have my boys in the kitchen area which is tiled. There are two doggie doors to go out. There is a dog fence stretched across the kitchen area so they cannot go on the couch. Now sometimes when I come home there is pee somewhere. I think they know we are going out and they are upset and decide to just pee .

Here are some thoughts to consider and use if you like. I don't know much about the dog so had to assume some things so disregard as over-generalization any situation that might not fit you or your dog. With most history, I could probably get a little closer to your situation so I am just posting a most general response to what your OP seems to indicate to me at this time.

Dogs poo and pee for various reasons - from stress, loneliness, frustration, exasperation, scents from outside, out of respect and for relief from all of those in addition to full bladders/bowels. Your dog is an older dog and has to be respected that he might have his own issues and given more time than a few months in order to be completely fair to him. He senses he's being left out and senses disapproval - heightening his anxiety state. When you take him out to potty before you leave, likely he's too anxious to go, knowing the worst is about to happen - his being left alone. Dogs are pack animals and until they are trained differently - and some even then - being alone is one of the worst things in the world to many of them. They want their pack - so we have to train and basically temper them to our way of life. It doesn't happen automatically and I wonder if his previous life might have been one where he was used to constant company.

Whatever his history or your lifestyle or anything else, a busy, healthy and happy dog will learn correct potty habits in most cases, given enough time and proper training. But when you get a rescue or older dog, there is usually always rehab work to do. I'd get busy enriching this dogs life, training him in obedience and working at learning things to build up his self-esteem, slowly teaching him how to obey you and want to please you for a positive reward and putting him on a strict potty regimen where he's taken out so often for a while he's bound to go potty some of those times and in the process, desensitize him from the outings. I'd simply take him out every 30 - 60 minutes for the first two weeks from this point on and then 30 minutes after meals, immediately after hard exercise, grooming, after visitors arrive and leave, after he's been in his crate or has napped or immediately after any intense experience in his life. He won't be so anxious that your are about to go off and leave him if you take him out a lot all day or evening and get him used to it. It will just begin to seem routine to him. This is part of what you buy into anytime you rescue a dog or get an older dog. You realize extra work might be required to make the dog into a good companion. And really, it's not that awful to devote a couple of weeks to get them out a lot in the big scheme of things.

I would get both yourself and your husband get involved in obedience training and walking him a lot. For 5 minutes a day 3 x a day(15 mins. total), give him basic obedience training and really praise and treat him for getting his command right and just say "uh oh" and no treat when he doesn't. Little by little with this training and rewarding of getting it right, he's learning how to work hard to get that reward. Keep it upbeat, loving, patient and very fun. It is a bonding and re-affirming exercise which helps dogs learn to trust in us and want very badly to please us. Get him out for frequent walks whenever you can - at least 2 a day. Buy him a couple of challenging toys and gently teach him how to use them to get the treat out. These challenges are so beneficial to keep a dog busy when you have to leave. Challenge him with little games you make up.

Train your dog to accept your leaving by simple Separation Anxiety training. I will post the way to train that if you want - just let me know. It slowly desensitizes the dog to accepting being left in a crate or pen while you are gone and they don't get stressed by it. Most simply learn to shut down and sleep while we are away with this training after a while. It is worth the little time it will take to do it and will pay off the rest of the dog's life.

A whole program of helping your dog to learn how to work learning commands and tricks for rewards and payoffs and gain self-confidence, pride of accomplishment and how to obey you, challenging games of hiding his treats about the house, under overturned Dixie cups, seeking out a special toy or object for a treat and toys lots of fun exercise and desensitization training can take a lot of his anxiety and stress issues away and make him over into the perfect pet, even when you have to be gone.

High-energy, unsure or nervous dogs or dogs that produce more adrenaline naturally are those that require extra work. Dogs that have sort of given up on life or very calm, submissive dogs are those that readily accept whatever life has to offer without protest and just go along. It sounds as if your dog is the former, so he'll take some more work. Would you be interested in the Separation Anxiety training tips?

I have the same problem. The puppy apt wont make a difference and Ill tell you why. Jess is not a rescue but came from a show breeder so she became used to always having other dogs around. She is perfect when we are home
always goes on her pad. She even goes on her pad in the crate when we are out and she has a five foot long crate with a bathroom area. The problem is she gets excited or anxious and runs through it and drags It all over the crate. I have left her in a room with the crate open but she pooped right in front of the door. (shes only done this once) So we have tried all the separation stuff and tv on etc etc and it still doesn't work. She steps in it and squishes it around! So I have to take the bottom off the crate (it has a bottom thank goodness and hose it off.) I am trying to find a way she could poop and it drops into a bin of some sort. I thought of a litter type thing but Im afraid either A. she'd eat it or B. she kick that all over the crate. So I feel your pain..:2omg:
looks like we are neighbors! :)

:aimeeyork@yorkietalkjilly
Yes please! I am 95% sure this is separation anxiety/abadoment. You asked for a little history on him.
Reading on his paperwork, he was born to a "greeder" (Karen Silkwood) in Missouri and sold to a petland store in Virginia at the young age of 8 weeks. When he arrived at the petland shop he had a horrible case of kennel cough that caused him to have a collapsed trachea. He was then bought by his first owners. They kept him several years (or at least that's what im assuming he may have had more owners) then our neighbors got him. Where a younger girl (maybe 12) was his sole care taker. The girls mom decided she no longer wanted him and would put him outside in hopes he would run off. Several other neighbors picked him up so he didn't get hit by a car and once he even got dropped off at animal control. We got him this Easter from those neighbors. He was not neutered (no biggie we just got him neutered) he also had kennel cough (again), a UTI, and an infection in his mouth so bad he needed to have 11 teeth extracted. We got all of that done and he has healed perfectly fine. He has the friendliest demeanor, loves people and gets lots of love and attention when we are home. He does not like being alone which is why Im sure the accidents are anxiety related!

@kemp5- lol yes it looks like we are neighbors! Puppy play date! lol

I have used the below technique to train over-anxious and barking dogs how to accept being left alone without misbehaving or becoming destructive. It is long, wordy and the copy/paste from my Word program can cause some of the words to run together but you might read it over and see if it might work for your girl. It was originally posted about an adult, male dog with female owner. When enough time and repetition is used to teach this method, it has worked every time to desensitize the dog to the concept of being left alone and they learn to relax and accept this fact of their lives. But it takes a lot of dedication and repetition by the owner, working faithfully with the dog. I hope it can help your sweet dog feel less anxious when you leave her/him home alone.

Separation Anxiety

Most anxious dogs that aren't used to it get nervous and anxious when their owners leave the home. Firstly, take all emotion out of your leaving. Do not feel sad for him or tell him goodbye - just like pack leaders in the wild don't when they decide to go on a hunt or take a walk - they just walk away and nobody freaks. They are impersonal and matter-of-fact in how and what they must do. So no emotional goodbyes or hello's when arriving home. Act like a pack leader. Your dog is a pack animal and is genetically in tune with a firm but fair leader. As far as your actual leaving, just slowly desensitize him to your leaving and soon he will come to accept it. But you must desensitize him to it slowly and allow him to adjust to each step. Be patient with that baby - his anxiety can be overcome with time and patience and knowing what to do. Keep your training sessions short and impersonal, matter-of-fact. (You can reward him once each exercise is over with a big, loving play session and lots of loving hugs, kisses.)

Give him a lovely food-stuffed kong toy, sit down and watch him playing with it, take up your keys and purse and whatever else you do as if to leave home and sit back down and just watch him. Don't go anywhere. Just sit there. Now this is key: keep repeating this for a day or two on a weekend over and over, giving him different things to chew on or play with as you get ready to go but don't.

After a day or two of this, when he's playing with his kong and has accepted your getting your things together, get your keys/purse, watch him for a while then get up and without saying one word to him or looking in his direction, just like an alpha wolf who acts in its pack without question from one of his pack members, walk out of your door outside. Shut it. Stand there 10 seconds and walk back in, DO NOT NOTICE HIM AT ALL, no matter how he's dancing around your feet or whining in joy, put your things away and sit back down where you usually sit when you watch him with his kong toy. Repeat this over & over and keep increasing your times outside to let him learn slowly that though momma goes out the door, she will be back and I'm really okay. Slowly but surely as you stay out longer and longer but do come back in, he'll have grown to accept this action as inconsequential in his life and soon grow to accept your leaving without thinking a thing of it -he'll know he gets a good thing to play with and some good food, momma will be back and he'll accept it. B4 long, he will just accept your leaving without any toys or kongs or anything. After a while, include getting in the car in this training exercise, even starting it up and getting right back out and coming in the house without noticing him. Repeat repeat repeat - sitting in the car awhile with it running. Eventually, drive around the block and then back home, inside, not noticing your dog and putting your things away, coming to sit in the same place on the couch where you always sit during this training. Once you have sat there a while after each training session, now it is time to play and reward that anxious baby who is learning to be a goooood dog so now have a blast with him. Lots of love, hugs, kisses, tugowar, etc. Happy, happy rewards for his efforts are definitely in order!

If you are patient enough to do this, it works EVERY SINGLE time and turns an anxious, crying dog into one that accepts leaving as just a part of his day.They soon learn to adjust their day to sleep while we are away and be ready togo when we get home.

I would also start him on a good positive-rewards obedience training program such as in Tamar Geller's The Loved Dog book. This will teach him to bond well with you as you develop a strong relationship that he will not question, no matter what, as he knows momma is always gonna keep it fun, loving and always rewarding for him. He'll learn to obey because pleasing you is so rewarding and fun for him. Challenging games of hiding his treats about the house, under overturned Dixie cups to knock over to get the treats out from under and directing him at seeking/finding a hidden, high-value treat in the house or outside are fun things to keep his mind and body active and working. Enriching his life with obedience and agility training, daily fun walks and anything that keeps him active will be a big help and lessens anxiety over time.

No doubt after all the changes in his life and all the illnesses and troubles, he's developed a deep insecurity and lack of trust in humans that keep abandoning him. The one constant in his life seems to have been change! All dogs hate change and insecure or anxious dogs cannot stand being alone - ever. It is just anathema to them. Trying to undergo settling into a new home, accepting a new situation and new everything so often and different expectations and different pottytraining efforts being used, I've no doubt he's soundly confused and very ill-at-ease unless you are present to reassure him.

Getting him busy learning and working his butt off and challenging his mind with consistent rules, boundaries and wonderful obedience training and working to desensitize him to separation should all work together to help this little fellow begin to finally trust he's found his forever family and home. Be sure to take him out to potty very, very frequently for a couple of weeks on a schedule his body-clock can come to expect and then you can back off the frequency. It should help diffuse his worries about going outside means you leave him afterward. Having your husband teach him will be helpful to your husband when he sees how smart Yorkies are. They LOVE learning and training and will excel given the least chance to learn by frequent, short training sessions daily without fail. I hope and pray for all of your sakes you can make it work. This guy deserves a forever home he can count on with his sad history.

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