Please help - older pup HATES Kids

[margot.]

Hi Everyone:

I have a 10 month old boy named Banksy - he's fabulous in every way except that he HATES children. The smaller they are the more he barks. He's never done anything, but I'm afraid he might. I don't know many people with kids and he's had a negative experience (a little girl asked to pet him, I said yes and then she hit him/was rough - I immediatly walked away, but still..).

Is there any way for him to get over this fear??

[my2boyz]

My Riley is the same way...the smaller the child the more scared he is. I haven't found a way to get him over this yet and he's a little over 2 now. Our grandson is almost 3 and when he's here Riley hides or wants me to carry him all day. If an older child is around, like 5 year old or more, he seems to be fine once he gets used to them being here but that's not the case with the little ones. We got Riley when he was almost 5 months old so I don't know what may have happened to him during that time. I've tried holding him and letting a child pet him very gently but he's just a wreck and I don't want to force the issue with him. We don't have kids around very often but it would be nice if he could relax when we do. I wish he could be a little more like Jo...Jo loves everybody...big or little...animal, vegetable or mineral...they're all here to play in Jo's eyes!

[Kbsqueff]

I've had dogs that HATED children, and there was nothing I could do about it to change that behavior... I even tryed a dog trainer but it didn't work out...

If a dog behavorist/trainer doesn't improve anything, the best thing you can do is tell children "you can look but you cannot touch"...

Another thing is don't force your pup to get petted by strangers IF he doesn't want to, it just make things worse...

[margot.]

I think in my zeal to get him acclimated (spelling?) to kids I may have pushed the issue a bit. It's really weird...sometimes he'll immediately start barking, other times he waits a bit and still other times he's (relatively) OK - meaning I can tell he's scared, but he's not barking.

this is a tough one...

[Tina_Luvs_Missy]

You are not the only one girl!!! Missy is so scared of children, ever since my little cousins came over.... they scared her so much because they were all laughing and running after her, so she freaked out. Ever since then, she does not like kids.... i guess the size of them, since they are short.

[KathyinCali]

I'm very careful introducing Lucy to children. Their natural inclination is to pet the top of her head and I just ask them to hold out their hand and let her smell them first. Makes for a much calmer introduction and so far she is doing well with the children.

[littlewhip]

One of my furkids ( charlie ) does not like small kids, my grandson is 1 & 1/2 so when he is here charlie goes in his crate, he would never bite, but he is so scared of hm, i dont take any chances, older kids he is fine with, its just the babies he is nervous around, hopfully he will get better with him as he grows. best to you

[FirstYorkie]

What you DON'T want to do is punish him for barking at the kids. He needs a way to tell them "Back off. I'm scared and I may get ugly". Punishing a dog for barking because he's afraid leads to a dog who bites with no warning.

I also would not recommend our natural inclination to pick them up and hold them while introducing him to kids. There is no way for him to back away when he's held and he will be more likely snap.

What I would do is carry treats in my pocket when you might encounter kids. Use older kids first who are more capable of following your directions. Ask them if they would help you train your dog. Most kids will jump at the opportunity. Have them first just drop treats for him. If he's comfortable going to get the treats, let them hold out a treat in their palms. When you first go to this stage, ask the kids to please not pet him. That would be pushing him too far. To make the explanation easier you can just say, "He's in training. He's not supposed to be petted by strangers right now".

When - and only when - he acts totally carefree about going to get treats from an unknown kid, you can then let them try giving a treat and petting.

Take your time and go slow with this. He needs to build up ALOT of positive associations with children.

[chandracz]

This was GREAT advice! Thanks for your thoughts!!!

[JeanieK]

I suggest that you watch a few episodes of the Dog Whisperer. You need to let the dog know that you are the pack leader and you will take care of him. then introduce him to children gradually.

At first just have the kids walk in and sit down, no touch no talk no eye contact. While you have the dog on the leash to make immediate corrections if necessary. not punichment, just corrections.

If you watch the shows, you will understand what I am talking about. It's hard to explain.

If he trusts you as the pack leader, then he will have no reason to fear the kids.

[Hickey007]

I like FirstYorkie's advice. I would definately try that. I think that way is making the dog look at the kids in a positive way. I think most families with dogs and small kids will say that the dogs follow the kids around a lot when they have food b/c they know they will drop something, or they sit right under their chair at dinner time. They associate the kid as a treat machine, at least some of the time.

Also I would make sure you have a safe spot for him to go. A bed of his own that is in a quiet room or a kennel that is out of the way. Somewhere that once he goes there no one can touch him or even bother him. Maybe when kids are over put him there and have him stay and make sure the kids don't bother him so he learns this is his safe spot. The other thing I might try is if you ever come across a sleeping child let him smell it and such. Let him see the child and explore it without risk of the child trying to touch him.

[Lorraine]

Some small dogs never do take a shine to small children. YOu could try what Firstyorkie suggested- carefully and always leave him a place to flee to if he is overwhelmed.
I have had Yorkies that would not take any treat dropped by a child, they were just too wary of the child. That could be the case with yours. Just be sure the child doesn't get in too close to the dog until and if you start seeing some cooperation from the dog and he is losing that fear of children.

[margot.]

Originally Posted by FirstYorkie

What you DON'T want to do is punish him for barking at the kids. He needs a way to tell them "Back off. I'm scared and I may get ugly". Punishing a dog for barking because he's afraid leads to a dog who bites with no warning.

I also would not recommend our natural inclination to pick them up and hold them while introducing him to kids. There is no way for him to back away when he's held and he will be more likely snap.

What I would do is carry treats in my pocket when you might encounter kids. Use older kids first who are more capable of following your directions. Ask them if they would help you train your dog. Most kids will jump at the opportunity. Have them first just drop treats for him. If he's comfortable going to get the treats, let them hold out a treat in their palms. When you first go to this stage, ask the kids to please not pet him. That would be pushing him too far. To make the explanation easier you can just say, "He's in training. He's not supposed to be petted by strangers right now".

When - and only when - he acts totally carefree about going to get treats from an unknown kid, you can then let them try giving a treat and petting.

Take your time and go slow with this. He needs to build up ALOT of positive associations with children.

this is good advice - and I've actually done this a bunch...not enough I suppose, though! I guess I should just keep at it. It's weird because his reactions change based on the child - some kids he's OK with, others not so much. In addition, I've watched the Dog Whisperer many, many times...and my pup understands commands, walks behind me and shows all the signs of a dog following the pack leader. I think that from a Dog Whisperer stance - Cesar might say it's that because he's barked at kids before - I get nervous and he picks up on that energy right away. I dont think its that my dog doesnt look at me like a pack leader, but that because I'm nervous he's going to bark, he gets nervous and barks. I think I'll also tire him out a bunch and then try some introductions. The only problem is I dont have kids and I dont know anyone that has kids...so it's a little tough. I've also sat with him in playgrounds to let him get used to the sounds and movements. It's mostly the wild, loud kids that scare him...which is just normal kid behavior. Anyway, Thanks so much for the advice!!

[muffinlvr]

My CoCo hates the little kids too. She's fine with the two 9-year old grandchildren but HATES the younger ones. She especially hates my 4 year-old granddaughter Isablella who tends to run around and shriek at times. I've gotten her to stop the running in the house but CoCo is still so afraid of her that she goes after Isabella's ankles! I have tried all of the above mentioned ways to make CoCo feel safe and have also had Isabella sit quietly and give CoCo treats but the minute Isabella gets up, CoCo goes crazy again. The other day CoCo nipped at Isabella's lower leg. She didn't break the skin but who knows what will happen the next time? So, I decided that when the grandchildren come over, I have to put CoCo in another room. My dogs don't have crates so I put CoCo in my bedroom and put a gate up at the entrance to the room so she can at least see and hear what's going on.

I thought that CoCo's behavior was aggression but I have come to realize that it's fear. She is so small (3.5 lbs.) and kids just make her nervous. I don't blame her but at the same time know that biting is unacceptable behavior.

[Lorraine]

Originally Posted by muffinlvr

My CoCo hates the little kids too. She's fine with the two 9-year old grandchildren but HATES the younger ones. She especially hates my 4 year-old granddaughter Isablella who tends to run around and shriek at times. I've gotten her to stop the running in the house but CoCo is still so afraid of her that she goes after Isabella's ankles! I have tried all of the above mentioned ways to make CoCo feel safe and have also had Isabella sit quietly and give CoCo treats but the minute Isabella gets up, CoCo goes crazy again. The other day CoCo nipped at Isabella's lower leg. She didn't break the skin but who knows what will happen the next time? So, I decided that when the grandchildren come over, I have to put CoCo in another room. My dogs don't have crates so I put CoCo in my bedroom and put a gate up at the entrance to the room so she can at least see and hear what's going on.

I thought that CoCo's behavior was aggression but I have come to realize that it's fear. She is so small (3.5 lbs.) and kids just make her nervous. I don't blame her but at the same time know that biting is unacceptable behavior.

That's not unusual behaviour for a very small Yorkie and a child running around screaming. Keep Coco safe in your room as you described while the younger grandchildren are visiting an keep in mind this is not the breed of dog for people with very young children. For this very reason you described.