Reassurance for a nervous/scared Yorkie? - YorkieTalk.com Forums

my2boyz · 09-16-2006, 05:10 PM

So Ceasar says not to coddle a scared or nervous dog because that will let them think the behavior is acceptable. Then how do you reassure a scared or nervous Yorkie? Riley is so sensitive and at times more nervous than I care for but it really gets on my husband's nerves...he says he's a wimp

and will ask "what's wrong with that dog?" How do I give Riley more confidence and build his bravery level? Jo is the opposite, he's confident, a true terrier and very inquisitive...pretty normal for a Yorkie. Riley, on the other hand, will scream like a girl if he even thinks he's been bumped and talk about jumpy...this is one goosey boy! I got him at 14 (or 16) weeks but I really think he was taken from his mother and litter mates way too soon and he missed a lot of the early socialization that is so important. Is this a simple matter of him needing more socialization?

my2boyz · 09-16-2006, 06:02 PM

Anyone?

chattiesmom · 09-16-2006, 06:34 PM

Some dogs, like some people just have a nervous nature. How do you make a jumpy nervous person not nervous anymore? Funny, if we were talking about horses, I could help you -- but with dogs, I just don't know.

Erin · 09-16-2006, 07:24 PM

Loki's the same way - very reactive. I also think he was taken from mom early. Anyway, we work with a positive trainer. You might not like me saying it, but ditch Cesar's way for this dog. Your dog has an emotional problem like people with OCD or ADD and you need to help him. I'm not saying to "coddle" that won't help, but you need to build some confidence in this dog and that's going to take a lot of conditioning. You have to teach your dog you won't put him in harm's way, although that doesn't mean you baby him but you do say, make sure other dogs or people or whatever he is scared of stay away. Keep him out of stressful situations. Even if this means getting your body in between him and the other dog. You need to learn how to deal with situations so that he doesn't have to. Positive training helps a lot because it teaches your dog to look to you for direction and it helps them learn the right way to behave. If you have a nervous dog and try to correct him like Cesar recommends you won't get anywhere. Positive training builds confidence.

If you want some book recommendations let me know, but you really might want to start off with a positive trainer and just take a class. The trainer will see where he is reactive and what he might be fearful of, then you can plan to work on it. We do things like go to the park (not the dog park) and watch the other dogs while I feed Loki high-value treats. These treats only come out when big dogs are around and the theory is that this makes him look forward to seeing the big dogs because he gets good treats. You also need to do some basic obedience because eventually you can teach your dog to "go to his spot" or stay in a down-stay when someone comes to the door. Loki goes crazy at the doorbell so we taught him to go to his crate on command.

Other things that we do is like, Loki goes crazy when someone just picks him up when he is comfy. He acts like he is being attacked. So now we ask for his attention first and I taught him commands like "off" and "move here" so that I just ask him to move or get off the couch and we just avoid the situation all together. We've worked A LOT with kids to make sure that he does OK with them. We go to the park and all the kids ask him to do his tricks and give him a treat. Therefore kids aren't scary because they mean food! (And this isn't theory, we've proven this one!!)

So like if you're out walking your dog and he doesn't do well on leash with other dogs say within 4 feet of him, then you pull to the side when other dog walks by and ask him to sit and "watch me" and then give him treats. If you let the dog get too close then you won't keep his attention so you have to back off far enough. Slowly over time you can get closer to the dog and keep his attention. This can be modified 100 ways. If your dog is afraid of big men in baseball caps then that's what you work on instead of dogs.

Socialization with people and dogs is a great but again I'd start under a trainer's care. Loki does way better off leash with big dogs (his problem area) and so I send him to doggie daycare under the trainer's supervision. He's good with people so to work on that we just go to the local outdoor mall and stuff. We do things like randomly ring the doorbell and practice running to his crate. Sometimes we just give in, like in a thunderstorm, and put his bed in the closet where he ends up anyway. If he's happy in there, fine. And we respect his privacy in his crate. If he goes there he wants to be left alone. Exercise also helps - but make sure you don't take him anywhere stressful when he's too tired and cranky that doesn't help either.

Anyway I learned most of this from training classes and some from books, and from just practicing. If you need help finding a trainer or some books let me know!!

my2boyz · 09-16-2006, 08:08 PM

Oh my...thank you for the info Erin but that sounds like a lot more than we're dealing with here. Riley just yelps/screams and carries on when he get's bumped or scared like today when the vacume handle fell in his direction...it scared him. He's very uptight around little kids but kids older than 3 or 4 are fine. He's fine around other animals, people and he walks fine on a leash but he seems pretty dependant on either me or Jo...he's comfortable with us...he's o.k. with my husband but would rather be with one of us. He's not afraid of storms or things like that...maybe he's not as bad as I thought! I don't follow Ceasar's advice per say...I just remember him saying that in one of his shows. I never allow my boyz to be in harm's way and I wouldn't hesitate to step in if it ever did happen...I'm very protective of them...it's my job as a Yorkie Mom!

Thanks for the advice/info and good luck with Loki.

Erin · 09-16-2006, 08:18 PM

I know I make Loki sound horrible don't I? That's just because I work really hard with him. Most people who encounter him think he's the best trained dog ever. He's really a good boy and he tries really hard. I guess I just think that it's worth the effort to help him.

Anyway, it's all the same concept. You just have to build their confidence. In the case of him yelping when he's bumped, I would get some good treats (like chicken) and then feed him the chicken while you gently "bump" him. You do the same thing for dogs who don't like to be brushed or don't like to have their feet touched. You do the thing they don't like and feed them good stuff.

Like, if he hates the vacuum give him a treat every time you take the vacuum out. Or have him "tag" the vacuum for a treat. (That would be funny!) Or simply crate him when you vacuum eliminating the problem. See - lots of options!

When Loki gets worked up I call him to me and we do tricks. It distracts him from whatever upset him (in your case the vacuum handle) and then he gets rewards for being good. This is why the training is good - so you have things to work on.

I don't mean to overwhelm you! It's all the same concept. Most people would just write it off and say their dog was timid or whatever - but there are ways to fix it! I just wanted you to see that! Good luck!!

GeorgiesMomma · 09-17-2006, 06:13 AM

IMO Cesars way of handling some situations makes no sense. When a child is scared you comfort them to make them feel better. I don't feel a dog is any different. Georgie doesn't like loud noises, going to the vet, the vacuum so I hold him pet him and talk to him to make him feel better. To me it's not a big deal he is scared I try to help him through it. If that makes him the leader well so be it. I think with timid or nervous dogs you have to console them and use positive reinforcement. I like all the techniques Erin suggested, and I hope that Riley breaks out of his shell. Good luck!

SnowWa · 09-17-2006, 10:44 AM

Sometimes I think -- even with children - a lot of coddling, cuddling, babying, etc., reinforces being timid, afraid, and shy. So - this doesn't just happen with dogs...

Of course - this doesn't mean you want your dogs or children to be frightened - and you do need to do something.

My shy dog - got the works - and he's much much better now. I didn't hold him and baby him. Whenever he behaved this way - I did just the opposite. I didn't say, "Oh you poor little thing - you're okay." I distracted him and got him up and out and doing something else. What I tried to do was get his mind off himself and being afraid and on to other things. I am sure this helped limit his fearful experiences and over time they became less an issue with him. Over time, he learned that he was going to be okay wherever we went....because he always was okay......

And - because he was shy - we went out a lot more. I took him with me whenever I could. I exposed him to more people and other dogs all that I could. If he got frightened - I didn't baby him or "talk to him about it." We often just went off to look at something else. And - I made him feel that we were going to do something else because I wanted to -- not for any other reason.

Anyway - he's 5 years old now - and people can't believe how outgoing and friendly he has become. He really was a very fearful pup and he has really made a turn around.

So - I do agree with Caesar. Don't baby your dogs - it will reinforce their fears. Turn their fear experiences quickly into something else... move on to a more secure activity - and as soon as they are over their fear and having fun --this is the time to reward their behavior.

Good luck! Carol Jean

my2boyz · 09-17-2006, 11:47 AM

Quote:

And - because he was shy - we went out a lot more. I took him with me whenever I could. I exposed him to more people and other dogs all that I could. If he got frightened - I didn't baby him or "talk to him about it." We often just went off to look at something else. And - I made him feel that we were going to do something else because I wanted to -- not for any other reason.

I've thought about taking Riley with me when I leave the house. I'd feel bad leaving Jo home alone but Jo doesn't have the same issues and he gets carsick so it's hard to take him on the spur of the moment anyway. I think Riley is just unsure of himself, we don't go out as much as we used to since we've been working on the house but that "should" be coming to an end soon

Also, I don't know what he was exposed to or made afraid of before I brought him home...I don't think he had a good time of it to be honest. But, I do need to do something...my husband says Riley has him on the edge all the time and I certainly don't want him to give up on him.

FirstYorkie · 09-17-2006, 12:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by my2boyz

. But, I do need to do something...my husband says Riley has him on the edge all the time and I certainly don't want him to give up on him.

Well, if you are serious about doing something, I think you should go back and reread both of Erin's posts as well as SnowWa's post. They both gave you good advice. Then, just do it!

olgap · 09-18-2006, 07:13 PM

I agree about using a trainer. We just had a trainer evaluation on Sat because I was convienced that Chico (9.5 mos) was an "agressive" dog because of how he behaved towards other dogs and people. I was ready to consider a bark collar, or medication! Anyway, this trainer spent 1 hour with us and Chico was a totally different dog! He determined that Chico was not "agressive", but just not trained properly - and that he is "highly trainable". (Believe me, I thought I had tried everything and I had read everything I needed to know, etc.) We signed up! I realized I had to get over being so defensive about what I had done so far. The most important thing is that Chico can be trained to be a great dog if I'm willing to do the work and let an expert guide me . I wish I had looked into a trainer sooner. Anyway, this is something you might consider, at least to determine what your doggie's issues actually are and the best way to handle them. Good luck.

SJK1113 · 09-18-2006, 09:33 PM

I didn't know that comforting them was wrong, but that's what I've been doing with Jake because that's just what comes natural to me. I do, however, comfort him for a minute to reassure him and then I try to distract him with a toy or something he likes. That seems to work fine, and he's seeming alot less scared about noises, etc. I think it just took time for him to get used to his new environment with all the different sounds.

09-16-2006, 05:10 PM	#1
my2boyz Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Illinois Posts: 3,661	Reassurance for a nervous/scared Yorkie? So Ceasar says not to coddle a scared or nervous dog because that will let them think the behavior is acceptable. Then how do you reassure a scared or nervous Yorkie? Riley is so sensitive and at times more nervous than I care for but it really gets on my husband's nerves...he says he's a wimp and will ask "what's wrong with that dog?" How do I give Riley more confidence and build his bravery level? Jo is the opposite, he's confident, a true terrier and very inquisitive...pretty normal for a Yorkie. Riley, on the other hand, will scream like a girl if he even thinks he's been bumped and talk about jumpy...this is one goosey boy! I got him at 14 (or 16) weeks but I really think he was taken from his mother and litter mates way too soon and he missed a lot of the early socialization that is so important. Is this a simple matter of him needing more socialization? __________________ Buckle up...it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car!

09-16-2006, 06:02 PM	#2
my2boyz Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Illinois Posts: 3,661	Anyone? __________________ Buckle up...it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car!

09-16-2006, 06:34 PM	#3
chattiesmom Donating YT 10K Club Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Georgia Posts: 13,379	Some dogs, like some people just have a nervous nature. How do you make a jumpy nervous person not nervous anymore? Funny, if we were talking about horses, I could help you -- but with dogs, I just don't know. __________________ *Yorkie Yummies Silk Step-In Harnesses * NapSaks I'll see you at the 3rd Annual International YT Meetup on the West Coast in 2010!**

09-16-2006, 08:08 PM	#5
my2boyz Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Illinois Posts: 3,661	Oh my...thank you for the info Erin but that sounds like a lot more than we're dealing with here. Riley just yelps/screams and carries on when he get's bumped or scared like today when the vacume handle fell in his direction...it scared him. He's very uptight around little kids but kids older than 3 or 4 are fine. He's fine around other animals, people and he walks fine on a leash but he seems pretty dependant on either me or Jo...he's comfortable with us...he's o.k. with my husband but would rather be with one of us. He's not afraid of storms or things like that...maybe he's not as bad as I thought! I don't follow Ceasar's advice per say...I just remember him saying that in one of his shows. I never allow my boyz to be in harm's way and I wouldn't hesitate to step in if it ever did happen...I'm very protective of them...it's my job as a Yorkie Mom! Thanks for the advice/info and good luck with Loki. __________________ Buckle up...it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car!

09-17-2006, 06:13 AM	#7
GeorgiesMomma Georgie is my world Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Laurel, MD Posts: 1,774	IMO Cesars way of handling some situations makes no sense. When a child is scared you comfort them to make them feel better. I don't feel a dog is any different. Georgie doesn't like loud noises, going to the vet, the vacuum so I hold him pet him and talk to him to make him feel better. To me it's not a big deal he is scared I try to help him through it. If that makes him the leader well so be it. I think with timid or nervous dogs you have to console them and use positive reinforcement. I like all the techniques Erin suggested, and I hope that Riley breaks out of his shell. Good luck! __________________ Mommy loves her little Ju Ju Bee & Baya http://www.dogster.com/?312207

09-16-2006, 07:24 PM	#4
Erin Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Chicago Suburbs Posts: 3,227	Loki's the same way - very reactive. I also think he was taken from mom early. Anyway, we work with a positive trainer. You might not like me saying it, but ditch Cesar's way for this dog. Your dog has an emotional problem like people with OCD or ADD and you need to help him. I'm not saying to "coddle" that won't help, but you need to build some confidence in this dog and that's going to take a lot of conditioning. You have to teach your dog you won't put him in harm's way, although that doesn't mean you baby him but you do say, make sure other dogs or people or whatever he is scared of stay away. Keep him out of stressful situations. Even if this means getting your body in between him and the other dog. You need to learn how to deal with situations so that he doesn't have to. Positive training helps a lot because it teaches your dog to look to you for direction and it helps them learn the right way to behave. If you have a nervous dog and try to correct him like Cesar recommends you won't get anywhere. Positive training builds confidence. If you want some book recommendations let me know, but you really might want to start off with a positive trainer and just take a class. The trainer will see where he is reactive and what he might be fearful of, then you can plan to work on it. We do things like go to the park (not the dog park) and watch the other dogs while I feed Loki high-value treats. These treats only come out when big dogs are around and the theory is that this makes him look forward to seeing the big dogs because he gets good treats. You also need to do some basic obedience because eventually you can teach your dog to "go to his spot" or stay in a down-stay when someone comes to the door. Loki goes crazy at the doorbell so we taught him to go to his crate on command. Other things that we do is like, Loki goes crazy when someone just picks him up when he is comfy. He acts like he is being attacked. So now we ask for his attention first and I taught him commands like "off" and "move here" so that I just ask him to move or get off the couch and we just avoid the situation all together. We've worked A LOT with kids to make sure that he does OK with them. We go to the park and all the kids ask him to do his tricks and give him a treat. Therefore kids aren't scary because they mean food! (And this isn't theory, we've proven this one!!) So like if you're out walking your dog and he doesn't do well on leash with other dogs say within 4 feet of him, then you pull to the side when other dog walks by and ask him to sit and "watch me" and then give him treats. If you let the dog get too close then you won't keep his attention so you have to back off far enough. Slowly over time you can get closer to the dog and keep his attention. This can be modified 100 ways. If your dog is afraid of big men in baseball caps then that's what you work on instead of dogs. Socialization with people and dogs is a great but again I'd start under a trainer's care. Loki does way better off leash with big dogs (his problem area) and so I send him to doggie daycare under the trainer's supervision. He's good with people so to work on that we just go to the local outdoor mall and stuff. We do things like randomly ring the doorbell and practice running to his crate. Sometimes we just give in, like in a thunderstorm, and put his bed in the closet where he ends up anyway. If he's happy in there, fine. And we respect his privacy in his crate. If he goes there he wants to be left alone. Exercise also helps - but make sure you don't take him anywhere stressful when he's too tired and cranky that doesn't help either. Anyway I learned most of this from training classes and some from books, and from just practicing. If you need help finding a trainer or some books let me know!!

09-16-2006, 08:18 PM	#6
Erin Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Chicago Suburbs Posts: 3,227	I know I make Loki sound horrible don't I? That's just because I work really hard with him. Most people who encounter him think he's the best trained dog ever. He's really a good boy and he tries really hard. I guess I just think that it's worth the effort to help him. Anyway, it's all the same concept. You just have to build their confidence. In the case of him yelping when he's bumped, I would get some good treats (like chicken) and then feed him the chicken while you gently "bump" him. You do the same thing for dogs who don't like to be brushed or don't like to have their feet touched. You do the thing they don't like and feed them good stuff. Like, if he hates the vacuum give him a treat every time you take the vacuum out. Or have him "tag" the vacuum for a treat. (That would be funny!) Or simply crate him when you vacuum eliminating the problem. See - lots of options! When Loki gets worked up I call him to me and we do tricks. It distracts him from whatever upset him (in your case the vacuum handle) and then he gets rewards for being good. This is why the training is good - so you have things to work on. I don't mean to overwhelm you! It's all the same concept. Most people would just write it off and say their dog was timid or whatever - but there are ways to fix it! I just wanted you to see that! Good luck!!

09-17-2006, 10:44 AM	#8
SnowWa No Longer a Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: USA Posts: 2,991	Sometimes I think -- even with children - a lot of coddling, cuddling, babying, etc., reinforces being timid, afraid, and shy. So - this doesn't just happen with dogs... Of course - this doesn't mean you want your dogs or children to be frightened - and you do need to do something. My shy dog - got the works - and he's much much better now. I didn't hold him and baby him. Whenever he behaved this way - I did just the opposite. I didn't say, "Oh you poor little thing - you're okay." I distracted him and got him up and out and doing something else. What I tried to do was get his mind off himself and being afraid and on to other things. I am sure this helped limit his fearful experiences and over time they became less an issue with him. Over time, he learned that he was going to be okay wherever we went....because he always was okay...... And - because he was shy - we went out a lot more. I took him with me whenever I could. I exposed him to more people and other dogs all that I could. If he got frightened - I didn't baby him or "talk to him about it." We often just went off to look at something else. And - I made him feel that we were going to do something else because I wanted to -- not for any other reason. Anyway - he's 5 years old now - and people can't believe how outgoing and friendly he has become. He really was a very fearful pup and he has really made a turn around. So - I do agree with Caesar. Don't baby your dogs - it will reinforce their fears. Turn their fear experiences quickly into something else... move on to a more secure activity - and as soon as they are over their fear and having fun --this is the time to reward their behavior. Good luck! Carol Jean

09-18-2006, 07:13 PM	#11
olgap Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Southern CA Posts: 131	I agree about using a trainer. We just had a trainer evaluation on Sat because I was convienced that Chico (9.5 mos) was an "agressive" dog because of how he behaved towards other dogs and people. I was ready to consider a bark collar, or medication! Anyway, this trainer spent 1 hour with us and Chico was a totally different dog! He determined that Chico was not "agressive", but just not trained properly - and that he is "highly trainable". (Believe me, I thought I had tried everything and I had read everything I needed to know, etc.) We signed up! I realized I had to get over being so defensive about what I had done so far. The most important thing is that Chico can be trained to be a great dog if I'm willing to do the work and let an expert guide me . I wish I had looked into a trainer sooner. Anyway, this is something you might consider, at least to determine what your doggie's issues actually are and the best way to handle them. Good luck.

09-18-2006, 09:33 PM	#12
SJK1113 No Longer a Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: usa Posts: 2,150	I didn't know that comforting them was wrong, but that's what I've been doing with Jake because that's just what comes natural to me. I do, however, comfort him for a minute to reassure him and then I try to distract him with a toy or something he likes. That seems to work fine, and he's seeming alot less scared about noises, etc. I think it just took time for him to get used to his new environment with all the different sounds.