To be completely honest

[Graleyne]

I am just not taking this whole thing with DH's ex as well as I'd like to be.

Now she has told DH's friend, E, (who she was dating) that they should only be friends. E, of course, is continuing to act like her boyfriend and jump everytime she bats her eyelashes.

Maybe I am just insecure with myself right now and that is probably a good 90% of the problem.

I was nothing but just absolutely nice to her while she was here. Even though when she smiled and battled her eyelashes at DH and told him she remembered how he liked his eggs I wanted to deck her. I didn't. Instead I smiled and laughed and told her he doesn't get his special eggs anymore.

It's just that even though she has supposedly broken up with E, she is still around (not really around DH unless we are around E) and I just plain don't want her to be.

I'm afraid if I don't go 1) that gives her a chance to sink her claws into DH, 2) I don't get to have a good time with E whom I genuinely love like a brother and enjoy being around, and 3) it makes me look like I really am jealous.

Whether its my own insecurities or her ditzy laugh and poor pitiful dumb little me act, as hard as I am trying I just don't like the girl. I really don't.

It just bothers me because honestly I am the type who normally gets along well with everyone. I don't like the fact that I don't like her.

So we are all supposed to go to Six Flags this weekend and I just do not want to have to put up with her. Seriously she is the type who will probably fake a faint or something so DH and E have to rush to her aid.

I swear if my ear didn't hurt I'd bang my head on the desk for a little while.

[Yorkiekids]

Can't you just sit down with your hubby and explain how she makes you feel. Hopefully he'll honor your families and try to slowly end this relationship. You might want to talk with E too. Your a better person then me. If she said she know how he liked his eggs I would have cracked some over her head.

[Mybabyboymax]

I agree, you should sit with your hubby and let him know you feel very uncomfortable. Explain to him that you are willing to meet him half way and you did spend time with her but now you feel its a bit excessive. Im sure he will understand. Just by that comment she made about his eggs shows shes immature and wants to get on your nerves, and you should tell your hubby exactly that. That was rude and very disrespectful in my opinion. sorry your feeling this way, its a tough spot to be in

[Monday]

Originally Posted by Graleyne

Even though when she smiled and battled her eyelashes at DH and told him she remembered how he liked his eggs I wanted to deck her. I didn't. Instead I smiled and laughed and told her he doesn't get his special eggs anymore.

Tell her to make them next time .... Ggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!

and remind her that he is NOT married to her anymore for a reason ....

[Tillys_mom]

You handled it a lot nicer than I would. I don't think she should come around if she makes you uncomfortable and your hubby should understand that I would think. I'm lucky hubby has no ties to his old gfs. He really only had one other and she WAS my best friend. Neither one of us like her so it works out good. hehe

[jp4m2]

I certainly would not want my husbands ex's hanging out with us.....
It would be very clear to me... as far as I'm concerned, as long as one partner is in contact with a past relationship, the word "past" no longer applies, therefore it's a problem...
Having my husband hanging out with an ex or a person of the opposite sex on a regular basis. It would have nothing to do with being insecure, I would find it cruel, disrespectful, and could be destructive to our relationship, it would allow the possibility for rekindling old feelings and cause suspicions to creep in.
I would never invite my old boyfriends over and expect my husband to hang out with them. If it would cause my husband pain, hurt or unease then our relationship would be top priority, no question about it, the ex goes. Nothing good can come out of this. She's an ex for a reason.
Her childish and immature behavior would not be an issue because she wouldn't be back....the friend would have to come alone or with a new GF...
Making excuses or trying to convince yourself that your the bad guy here if you don't welcome this women into your home with open arms is uncalled for. What your feeling is very reasonable and understandable. This is just going to get bigger and uglier..I hope you get this resolved soon for your relationships sake....



I

[crystalsmom]

Gosh I couldn't believe the fact that your hubby would put you through this. I don't know if I would tell her she's not married to him anymore but I sure darn well would tell him.

The way you are feeling now is not insecure, what it is, is smart. You can see there is trouble ahead for you and hubby and if all he sees and likes is the attention of two women. Don't put the blame on her when you talk to him because he will love you are jealous, I would put the blame on him for putting you in such a situation. All he has to say is something came up and we can't go and he should be the one to make the excuses each time.

He'll come around, he just needs alittle push.

[Chrissy0277]

Seriously she is the type who will probably fake a faint or something so DH and E have to rush to her aid.

Well thats when you kick her and ask her about that egg trick that makes them so special. Then you point and laugh and tell her to go the "F" away

Well ok that isnt the most mature thing to do but.... I bet it would of felt good
Hopefully you can figure something out that makes this situation better

[Bizzymammabee]

Originally Posted by Graleyne

I am just not taking this whole thing with DH's ex as well as I'd like to be.

Now she has told DH's friend, E, (who she was dating) that they should only be friends. E, of course, is continuing to act like her boyfriend and jump everytime she bats her eyelashes.

Maybe I am just insecure with myself right now and that is probably a good 90% of the problem.

I was nothing but just absolutely nice to her while she was here. Even though when she smiled and battled her eyelashes at DH and told him she remembered how he liked his eggs I wanted to deck her. I didn't. Instead I smiled and laughed and told her he doesn't get his special eggs anymore.

It's just that even though she has supposedly broken up with E, she is still around (not really around DH unless we are around E) and I just plain don't want her to be.

I'm afraid if I don't go 1) that gives her a chance to sink her claws into DH, 2) I don't get to have a good time with E whom I genuinely love like a brother and enjoy being around, and 3) it makes me look like I really am jealous.

Whether its my own insecurities or her ditzy laugh and poor pitiful dumb little me act, as hard as I am trying I just don't like the girl. I really don't.

It just bothers me because honestly I am the type who normally gets along well with everyone. I don't like the fact that I don't like her.

So we are all supposed to go to Six Flags this weekend and I just do not want to have to put up with her. Seriously she is the type who will probably fake a faint or something so DH and E have to rush to her aid.

I swear if my ear didn't hurt I'd bang my head on the desk for a little while.

Your good because quite frankly the brooklyn girl in me would have shoved them special eggs up her nose. How dare she say something like that. Honestly DH should see what she is doing which is trying to goad you on. Men are so damn dense at times that it infuriates me to think about it.

I would have told her the eggs weren't that special and that is why he doesn't eat them anymore. AAAAh. Hon I feel for you because that is sort of a no win situation.

Honestly don't let her get to you. You would be playing right into her hands with that. Just remember she is a pig for essentially dating what is two friends. That is just a plain nasty tramp.

What your feeling is not insecurity it's that womans intuition chiming in there...so listen to it.

[crystalsmom]

Maybe when she said "Remember when I would give you your special eggs"

You could have said " Well I give him something else special lol" wink

I'm not saying it wouldn't bother me but I just don't think you should make it all her when it is so darn tempting to do so.

[Shadow]

Originally Posted by jp4m2

I certainly would not want my husbands ex's hanging out with us.....
It would be very clear to me... as far as I'm concerned, as long as one partner is in contact with a past relationship, the word "past" no longer applies, therefore it's a problem...
Having my husband hanging out with an ex or a person of the opposite sex on a regular basis. It would have nothing to do with being insecure, I would find it cruel, disrespectful, and could be destructive to our relationship, it would allow the possibility for rekindling old feelings and cause suspicions to creep in.
I would never invite my old boyfriends over and expect my husband to hang out with them. If it would cause my husband pain, hurt or unease then our relationship would be top priority, no question about it, the ex goes. Nothing good can come out of this. She's an ex for a reason.
Her childish and immature behavior would not be an issue because she wouldn't be back....the friend would have to come alone or with a new GF...
Making excuses or trying to convince yourself that your the bad guy here if you don't welcome this women into your home with open arms is uncalled for. What your feeling is very reasonable and understandable. This is just going to get bigger and uglier..I hope you get this resolved soon for your relationships sake....



I

[jp4m2]

Graleyne, I hope you read these posts and take them to heart, we are women confirming your correct instincts...you probably felt the same way but by trying to be "nice" you felt it was wrong to turn her "friendship" away....don't second guess yourself, just because nothing has happened YET doesn't mean you have no reason to stop this so called "friendship" with this woman....she had a relationship with your husband, there's a history of good times...DH is probably denying any old warm and fuzzies for her, but under the right circumstances they can be reignited....

When you and your DH are gong through real life i.e. bills, in laws, a stopped up toilet, and just bickering between you two, Airhead will be right there with a shoulder to b**ch and moan on, with her "Poor baby, she just doesn't understand you like I do's.'...Don't open that door, it would be a big mistake...Your DH should understand this and back you up...After all which relationship is most important to him,keeping his wife happy and respecting her view and feelings or fighting to maintain Airheads presence? ..I guess you'll find out soon...

[Superstarkba]

Well, does DH really want to go to six flags?? just tell him that you want to come to my house to see the dogs lol. Just tell him how you feel and that you were nice to her when she came to visit, and you just don't want to be around her, now that you figured out her personality.

[twalla]

Originally Posted by jp4m2

Graleyne, I hope you read these posts and take them to heart, we are women confirming your correct instincts...you probably felt the same way but by trying to be "nice" you felt it was wrong to turn her "friendship" away....don't second guess yourself, just because nothing has happened YET doesn't mean you have no reason to stop this so called "friendship" with this woman....she had a relationship with your husband, there's a history of good times...DH is probably denying any old warm and fuzzies for her, but under the right circumstances they can be reignited....

When you and your DH are gong through real life i.e. bills, in laws, a stopped up toilet, and just bickering between you two, Airhead will be right there with a shoulder to b**ch and moan on, with her "Poor baby, she just doesn't understand you like I do's.'...Don't open that door, it would be a big mistake...Your DH should understand this and back you up...After all which relationship is most important to him,keeping his wife happy and respecting her view and feelings or fighting to maintain Airheads presence? ..I guess you'll find out soon...

Edited to add -- And if you want to kick her butt, I will hold her down =)

[jp4m2]

Originally Posted by twalla

Edited to add -- And if you want to kick her butt, I will hold her down =)

LOL!...And I will cram those "special eggs" of hers where the sun don't shine....