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01-21-2011, 08:32 PM | #1 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| 15 year old son not interested in driving I cannot get my 15 year old to take his driver's permit test! What is up with that? I could not WAIT to get my driver's license, etc. I'm not sure if he is afraid of failing it or if he thinks I'm going to turn him loose and quit doing anything for him when he starts driving. Our neighbor frequently talks about how she doesn't cook; that her son could drive and get his own meals, etc. I've assured him that I'm not going to do that . . . . Do you think he's just not ready? I'm just afraid that I won't be able to get him to all his early morning practices this summer with my work schedule.
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
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01-21-2011, 08:39 PM | #2 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: USA
Posts: 798
| Does he do well in school? Maybe he thinks he won't pass the test? You could get a few booklets from the DMV and tell him if he wanted to read them he could. Is there a driving(simulator) class at his school? Maybe take him "Car-looking". Does he get a car when he gets his license?? Maybe he's counting on his friends to give him rides...or that his friends will ask him and he knows that gas is super expensive? You could polish up his bike and say "Looky here....since you don't want to drive, you'll have to ride this to all your practices this summer."
__________________ MuffinBoomer Last edited by 2Morkies; 01-21-2011 at 08:42 PM. |
01-21-2011, 09:02 PM | #3 |
Donating YT 30K Club Member | Maybe he is nervous about the huge responsibility that comes with driving. I would ask him what he sees as the pros and cons of getting his permit and maybe that will give you some idea. I didn't get my DL until I was 25! lol I didn't have access to a car and loved to walk everywhere.
__________________ Cali Pixie Roxie : RIP Nikki; RIP Maya;RIP my sweet Dixie girl 1/17/08 http://callipuppyscastle.bravehost.com/index.html |
01-21-2011, 09:07 PM | #4 |
Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: FL
Posts: 7,651
| There are usually practice tests online. In fact, in Florida, I think they can take their permit test online. So, at least you could see if that has anything to do with his reluctance. I would want to find the reason. Most kids are chomping at the bit to get the permit and more importantly the license. You will want to help him with any worry he might have about driving, the test, or just the idea of so much responsibility and independence. Maybe he is thinking about it in more depth than most. There really is a LOT to consider but most just think -- "YES I get to drive!" But he may have a particular worry about driving itself. Best to find out what it is and offer your help. I would start by finding time when you can ask him privately about his concerns. If he doesn't open up, you may have to try to offer some possible reasons and then try to cover them even if he doesn't claim a particular fear or concern. Has he been shy or timid in any other things? Was he eager to start school, begin, middle and high schools? Is he interesting in dating? Some just are a little less happy with change of any kind. Does he know of any older friend that had a bad accident? Has he ever been in an accident with someone else driving? The fear of an accident can be a big deterrant to wanting to drive. My grandma did not want to learn, but my encouraged her and taught her. In the first month with her license, she was sitting at a red light and someone came from behind and hit her. It was not a bad accident, but it was enough, that she did not want to ever drive again and she didn't. But it could be something entirely different so better to find out from your son what is on his mind. As much as it does help to have another driver in the family, I found I missed driving mine around. Those were our catch-up times, to hear about their day and what plans they had. Once they started driving on their own, it was hard to pin them down for conversations, especially during each sport season! My youngest was into everything, so getting any chunk of time with him on a consistent basis was tough after he started driving himself. It still is! So maybe you don't want to rush him too much. Good luck!
__________________ FlDebra and her ABCs Annie, Ben, Candy Promoting Healthy Breeding to the AKC Yorkshire Terrier Standard |
01-21-2011, 10:01 PM | #5 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Washington
Posts: 837
| I'd say he's lacking confidence or is afraid of failing the test. He'll come around I'm sure. Just take him out and give him lots of practice and soon you'll be having to hide the keys! But in the mean time...count your blessings. I've been through 3 teenage girls learning to drive and our last child just turned 14...whew, can't believe I survived the 3!!!
__________________ Kendra |
01-22-2011, 04:09 AM | #6 |
♥ Piccolo & Vivi ♥ Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Kentucky
Posts: 14,311
| I remember a long, long, long time ago (ha) my Mom had to practically beg me to take the driver's test. I have no idea why I was not interested, but she said it was because I was getting plenty of rides everywhere and did not feel motivated. Not sure why your son is not interested, but do take that into consideration too.
__________________ Lisa, Dixie, and Jazzy (RIP Piccolo and Vivi) |
01-22-2011, 05:22 AM | #7 |
Donating YT 100K Club Member & Top YorkieTalk Poster! Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: western KY
Posts: 108,935
| My daughter is going through this very same thing,my GD is 16 and is very bright she excels in school has always had straight A's except 1 B her freshman yr and that really upset her...but she has no interest in driving i told my D she should not push her to much maybe she is afraid i don't know...sometimes it is like a zoo out there in traffic...probably when they are older they will change their minds
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01-22-2011, 05:25 AM | #8 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| He doesn't seem interested in dating; he's a swimmer and spends all of his time in the water. 2 1/2 hours a day; six days a week. Seems to be pretty much all he cares about. He does make good grades in school . . . maybe he is concerned about the responsibility. He has a brand new Jeep Compass sitting here in the driveway just waiting for him; it's his Grandad's car and he is going to give it to Matt. He might be a tad worried that he will be reponsible for driving his Grandad everywhere! I've tried to talk to him about it but he won't really say. I'll try again. I'm a claim adjuster who investigates auto accidents with injury; he's seen some pretty grusome photos . . . . perhaps I have made him paranoid! I mean I wanted him to be a little scared and cautious about driving but maybe I talk too much about what I see every day.
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
01-22-2011, 07:05 AM | #9 |
BANNED! Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Illinois
Posts: 4,603
| Last thing you want to do is push the issue. I doubt he is afraid of failing a test. Heck, here is Illinois we have drivers that can't speak english, that are not citizens, and those that bribe the State Examiners. Give him time. Speaking for myself, I could not ait to be 16 so I could drive. Got my license the day I turned 16. Been anti-climatic after that day. Give him some time. Mayhe he knows he is not ready, maybe not. |
01-22-2011, 07:55 AM | #10 | |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: E. Falmouth, Mass
Posts: 2,102
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01-22-2011, 07:59 AM | #11 |
YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: canton ohio us
Posts: 1,574
| I did not drive until I had to take responsibility of the kids I just did not want to no reason but i could get wear i wanted on the bus and i loved to walk even in the snow so I had no reason to want a car I was 21 before i started to drive
__________________ Don't say I love you unless you mean it, but if you do say it a lot. People forget. |
01-22-2011, 08:31 AM | #12 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Ky
Posts: 232
| My oldest didn't get her permit till she was 18. She wasn't ready and I wasn't going to make her do it. My middle daughter was there the day she turned 16. She had saved enough money to buy her first car and pays her own insurance. She is a planner and saver. Now my son who is the youngest turned 16 two weeks ago, hasn't even shown any interest at all. I will just wait until he shows interest and take it from there. I wouldn't push. It is a big responsibility. |
01-22-2011, 08:50 AM | #13 |
Action Jackson ♥ Donating Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Maryland
Posts: 17,814
| I wasn't like super motivated to get my drivers license at first. I was right at the age when we were allowed to get our permit (I think 15 and 9 months) when my little brother died though, so it kind of put a halt on my life, to be honest. I ended up not getting my license 'til I was already over 17... I think I was in the middle of my senior year. Once I was being driven to school by my mom senior year, that's when I became motivated to get my license! Lol. All my friends already had theirs, and so I just decided I needed to DO it. To be honest, I failed my test twice because I couldn't parallel park for the life of me! LOL. After the second fail, I was really discouraged. But I did it...
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01-22-2011, 09:59 AM | #14 |
Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Georgia
Posts: 3,262
| My son was 15 in March 2009 but got his learners permit in June. He was too lazy to study for the test. In Georgia you have to take a 30 hour driving course, have 6 hours of actual driving with an instructor and a Drug and Alcohol Awareness program before you can get your license. He got his license in June 2010. Also in Ga. the driver can't have any passengers except family for the first 6 months and only 1 passenger for the next 6 months. My son was so excited that the law allows him to have a passenger but we won't allow it. We also have a no texting or talking on the phone law if you are under 18. Your son may just need more time, my son has friends that still aren't driving. There is a lot of pressure on kids now. It is very convenient that my son can drive to Football practice and other places, but it scares me to death and all I can do is Pray that he will be ok and come home safe.
__________________ SUSAN : TESSIE : HOBBES :CALVIN :SASSY There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face! ~ Ben Williams Last edited by susan lynn; 01-22-2011 at 10:01 AM. |
01-22-2011, 11:10 AM | #15 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| Thank you all for sharing your experiences. I feel better now and won't push him if he's not ready. Brit, I'm sorry to hear about your little brother. My older brother was killed in a car accident at a very young age; it's like a dark shadow over the whole family.
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
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