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05-27-2009, 07:22 AM | #1 |
♥I Luv my BaileyBlue♥ Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,855
| The circle needs to stop! Hi Everyone, I've never posted in this section before and i'm only doing it because I could really use some good solid advice. My boyfriend and I just recently broke up after being together for just about 3 years. Bailey and I had to move out of his house, I ended up breaking/cracking my finger during all of this and also had to rush Bailey to the ER only to find out that he has Pancreatitis. I'm feeling really depressed lately. I don't feel like eating, sleeping or anything. This is not like me. The advice I would give to my friends in this situation just doesn't apply. I'm blaming myself for everything that went wrong in the relationship. The other quandry I have is now I have to find a place to live (currently i'm staying with my parents). Do I get a roommate, or live alone. Money would be tight if I lived alone, but I could do it. I'm lost and confused and am looking for guidance and advice. Thanks in advace...
__________________ Chandra, Bailey Blue's mama |
Welcome Guest! | |
05-27-2009, 07:37 AM | #2 |
Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: FL
Posts: 7,651
| Sorry you have hit such a rough patch in life. As long as you and your parents are okay about it, I would stay there for a while. Just take a break and relax a little. Try to decide what YOU really want to do. Sometimes we make decisions in a hurry and wind up regretting them. You have the luxury of being able to take a little time to get your ideas together and really make a move based on careful contemplation. Relationships rarely break up because of one person, so don't beat yourelf up. Try to think if there is anything you want to change for future relationships but don't dwell on placing blame. Sometimes when everything seems to be going wrong, we realize that it has just opened the way for a new and exciting part of our lives. I was having a rough time myself, when I suddenly looked at a good friend a whole new way. By ending one relationship, it allowed me to see what was right in front of me and what a wonderful marriage and life I wound up with. Keep positive that there will be better times in your future. Maybe this has happened so you too can find the true love of your life! Hope your finger and Bailey's pancreatitis are much better! Wish you both a speedy recovery -- from the physical and emotional trials you have faced!
__________________ FlDebra and her ABCs Annie, Ben, Candy Promoting Healthy Breeding to the AKC Yorkshire Terrier Standard |
05-27-2009, 07:47 AM | #3 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Weymouth, Ma
Posts: 2,584
| Break ups stink, I would stay at your parents until you are 100% sure your relationship is over, often times you both realize what went wrong and want to change it and start over expecially after 3 years... you dont want to jump into a lease or leave a roommate, which is what I would suggest!! Sometimes having a room mate is alot of fun and that would be the avenue I would take personally!
__________________ I Support http://www.yorkiesinc.com/ |
05-27-2009, 07:56 AM | #4 |
Donating Senior Yorkie Talker | You need to absordb Don't rush into anything. Things just happened. You need time to figure it all out. Live with your parents and come up with a plan. Maybe you can save up some money and find a good roommate,or not. Let some time pass,and take are of your self. Hope Bailey feels better. This effects then also,they know when we're hurting. Don't let the blues get to you. You will survive this. Take the dog for a long walk outside in the sunshine everyday...and the rest will come with time. Good Luck!!!HUGS!!!
__________________ N.Y. 'S FINESTPONGO,AIDEN,HARLEY, KI-KI ,GARFIELD ,MINI-ME |
05-27-2009, 08:04 AM | #5 |
Jojo's & Junior's too! Donating YT Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Watsonville, CA
Posts: 1,379
| Break ups are the worst. It such a rough time to go through. You start to doubt yourself, and wonder of all the what if's. Be strong, and try to soak up some of the advice you would give your friends (you are you own best friend). Try to do what feels right, I would also have to say that you should stay at your parents for as long as you can. Unfortunately only time will heal everything, so in the mean time, try to smile-everything will be fine. Good luck & best wishes to you
__________________ Josie, Jojo, Junior & Veronica **...No Home is Complete Without a Yorkie...or Two...better make that 3!..** |
05-27-2009, 08:45 AM | #6 |
♥I Luv my BaileyBlue♥ Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,855
| Thanks everyone, i'm just so sick to my stomach and I know I need to keep food in my system but every time I eat I feel sick. I'm not used to feeling this way, I'm usually a VERY strong person!!! I'm 31 years old and not too keen on staying with my parents too long, but i'd like to pay off a few bills before I move out into my own place. Plus I need to buy furniture and stuff... UGH! I have so much on my plate right now, all I want to do is sleep!!!!
__________________ Chandra, Bailey Blue's mama |
05-27-2009, 10:18 AM | #7 | |
Luv my Angel, too! Donating Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: USA
Posts: 9,333
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__________________ Sissy & Angel | |
05-27-2009, 10:41 AM | #8 | |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Weymouth, Ma
Posts: 2,584
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__________________ I Support http://www.yorkiesinc.com/ | |
05-27-2009, 02:28 PM | #9 |
Donating YT 30K Club Member | I am sorry you are going through a rough patch. THe others have all given great advice. Take it slow and allow yourself time to grieve the loss of the relationship. Try and eat a little something every few hours even though you have no appetite, you will feel better physically and have more energy to move on.
__________________ Cali Pixie Roxie : RIP Nikki; RIP Maya;RIP my sweet Dixie girl 1/17/08 http://callipuppyscastle.bravehost.com/index.html |
05-27-2009, 10:24 PM | #10 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Posts: 2,883
| i am sorry that things are not going well for you right now. take care of yourself and bailey. take some time to relax and think things through. i would highly recommend getting a place that is already furnished. moving sucks, what sucks even more is moving WITH FURNITURE!!! i think getting a roommate is a good idea if you can find a good roommate. and you want to be sure to find someone who love dogs.
__________________ www.yenspiration.com i love milu |
05-28-2009, 03:11 PM | #11 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Maryland
Posts: 2,410
| If you have parents that are still alive and willing to help you out, stay as long as you can! Don't jump into anything right now. You have been through enough. Take this time to just unwind and think about what direction you want to be headed. Get centered again. In this tumultuous ride that we call life, we often do not take enough time to ourselves. It is ok to be selfish now and then. Take care of yourself! |
05-28-2009, 03:30 PM | #12 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Florida
Posts: 2,181
| First I want to say how sorry I am for you. I wish I knew the right words to make you feel better. I do know from a mother of a daughter 38 and a son of 39, that both of them have been back home to live when times get rough for whatever reason. I enjoy knowing I can be there for them to get their feet back on the ground. They think things through, and then usually end of making the right decision. If you have the chance to stay with your parents for awhile, do so. Get your mind clear, and get rid of all the bad thoughts. Then if you decide to get your own place, or a place with a roommate, you will know it is the right decision because you have thought it through. Give your little baby a hug, and I wish you the best of luck. Darlene
__________________ My 6 Loves Sassy, Gracie, Rosie, Rocky..... Raindrop, and Candy |
05-29-2009, 05:43 AM | #13 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 10,534
| awww sweetie! I am so sorry you are going through all this. Its crazy how it seems that whenever something major goes wrong, its quickly followed by other things. I feel for you so much. (((HUGS))) I think either way, if you got a roommate or lived alone would be good for you. I have done all 3, lived with a rommate, lived with a long-term boyfriend/fiance and lived alone. Personally living alone is hardest financially but easiest mentally and emotionally. I live alone now with my 2 boys (my yorkies) and LOVE it! Its a hard decision to make though, you need to know whats good for you!
__________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz |
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