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02-03-2008, 11:30 PM | #1 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 857
| Breaking up... and breaking down. Hey All I'm not the type to talk about boyfriend/breakups with people but I am lost. I have NOONE to talk to. My boyfriend of 5.5 years has broken up with me. It has been a long time coming... but I had always hoped we would SOMEHOW pull through. The hardest part is that we live together and I am SOOOO emotional around him and he is VERY callus and stoic about it. He is also being very mean to me. And I break down and he doesn't want to comfort me AT ALL-- gets mad at me for crying. I don't know what else to do. My yorkie usually sleeps in his room and I stole him tonight so I didn't have to feel so alone... I was hoping this would make me feel less alone as well.
__________________ Mom to OLIVER & CHARLIE Scents & Warmers for your home from a YT member & Independent Scentsy Consultant https://elizabethcampbell.scentsy.us/Home |
Welcome Guest! | |
02-03-2008, 11:33 PM | #2 |
Love My Furbabies! Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: somewhere
Posts: 4,427
| I'm really sorry This has got to be so tough on you **hugs** My now DH and I broke up for about a year during our 5 year relationship and still had to live in the same apt (housing in Boston is a nightmare), so I can understand where you are coming from. It was very difficult to co exist some days . |
02-03-2008, 11:36 PM | #3 | |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 857
| Quote:
It's just so hard to break up with someone you've grown up with and then to have them turn around and make you feel like you're emotions are a waste of his time and energy.. after all we have been through and he's so bitter and angry over everything I say or try to say... and he just get furious if I start crying... I don't understand how people can be so uncaring...
__________________ Mom to OLIVER & CHARLIE Scents & Warmers for your home from a YT member & Independent Scentsy Consultant https://elizabethcampbell.scentsy.us/Home | |
02-03-2008, 11:40 PM | #4 | |
Love My Furbabies! Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: somewhere
Posts: 4,427
| Quote:
It was actually a really good thing for our relationship because when we got together I was 19, he was 28 so he had a lot more experience than I did in relationships. He was my first serious relationship and I started to wonder what else was out there. I found out after all was said and done that I didn't really need to look anywhere else, because the person I loved, I already had. It was really hard though and there were hurt feelings and tough times. I'm sorry that he isn't being more supportive of your feelings and emotions. I can't imagine how that must feel. It is such a long time to be with someone and then to have it change so suddenly . Is it more just on his end, or have things not been good for a while for both of you? I'm sorry he's being a meanie right now | |
02-03-2008, 11:44 PM | #5 | |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 857
| Quote:
__________________ Mom to OLIVER & CHARLIE Scents & Warmers for your home from a YT member & Independent Scentsy Consultant https://elizabethcampbell.scentsy.us/Home | |
02-03-2008, 11:51 PM | #6 | |
Love My Furbabies! Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: somewhere
Posts: 4,427
| Quote:
I don't know if you are a part of a church or anything like that, but they usually offer low cost or free sessions. I'm really sorry you are going through this. I know that my dating other people while we were broken up was a hard thing for my DH to accept as well even though he had agreed to it to begin with. | |
02-04-2008, 12:02 AM | #7 |
YT 500 Club Member | I am so sorry you are going through this, I am also. I have trust issues and that really does hurt the relationship but to me you have to have a guy who is really willing to work it out with you and not give you reasons to not trust him. Now i also agrww that you both should try couple counseling the both of you have been together a long time and I think that your relationship is worth getting counseling on. I wish I could offer more. I hope everything turns out for the best.
__________________ I have lost my bestfriend, Poppy my angel,my protector March 29,2008-June 14,2009. |
02-04-2008, 05:13 AM | #8 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: upstate ny
Posts: 5,847
| I'm sorry you are going thru this but based on some of the things you are saying maybe it is for the best. Do you really want to be with someone you don't really trust? Do you really want to be with someone who has a hard time sympathizing with how you are feeling? Do you really want to be with someone gets angry when you show how you are feeling? I know I'm only hearing your side of things but based on that, he kinda sounds like a jerk and don't you deserve better than that? It's out there somewhere and you a never gonna find it if you are willing to settle for what you have there. It's scary but you will get thru this and I imagine someday you will look back and say thank goodness! |
02-04-2008, 05:30 AM | #9 | |
Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member | Quote:
Good luck !! It sounds like you're going thru the really hard part right now - but I promise - it gets better and you'll meet someone who won't walk all over you | |
02-04-2008, 05:37 AM | #10 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 10,534
| Oh girl... I so know the feeling. The guy I was with for almost 10 years, engaged to and owned a stupid house with broke up with me, left me to cancel the wedding, sell the house... all while still trying to co-exist. Can you kick him out? I mean he is the one who broke up with you? I kicked my ex to his mothers house until our house sold. He also was very callous and mean about it, he once told me a long time ago that the guy feels like they have to be mean about it so they leave no room for false hope with the girl. I guess it makes sense, and there is no happy medium right? You break her heart and the only thing that is worse than that is giving her false hope afterwards by trying to offer comfort or support. To tell ya the truth girl, if he was to offer you comfort it wouldn't help you, cuz he is the cause of your pain. Im so sorry you are having to go through this, PM me if you want to talk.... I can also direct you to another forum (where Im an admin) for dealing with break ups, where you can chat, vent, cry, scream and make some friends while you go through this. It took me over 2.5 years to get over him but I am now and looking back, my break up was a LONG time overdue as well, so it will get better! I promise!
__________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz |
02-04-2008, 09:03 AM | #11 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 857
| Thanks guys... It i freakin so hard. I can't kick him out... we share an apartment here at school. I'll be done in March and I can move out if this is still too painful for me. He doesn't realize (maybe he does??) that he is being an A*S to me because he always says that it's my fault in the first place. There are a lot of things wrong with our relationship... but there were so many good things too... I've suggested counseling (awhile back) but we never looked into it... At this point I don't know if he's willing to put in the effort. He just acts like he's so sick of me. It makes me feel like trash. I hate this... I want to thank you all for your support and sharing your stories. It heps me to realize that I'm not alone and these things do happen, to good people, all the time.
__________________ Mom to OLIVER & CHARLIE Scents & Warmers for your home from a YT member & Independent Scentsy Consultant https://elizabethcampbell.scentsy.us/Home |
02-04-2008, 10:21 AM | #12 |
YT 6000 Club Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: CA
Posts: 6,588
| I know it's hard and I'm so sorry you're going through. No offense but your ex sounds like a jerk. I wouldn't waste any more time with him. As hard as it must be cut your losses and run QUICK! His true colors are showing and it's not a good thing. You are an intelligent, beautiful girl who deserves someone who will treat you like a Princess. Please don't sell yourself short. YOU WILL NOT END UP ALONE SO DON'T SETTLE. I think that is always the biggest fear. Good luck.
__________________ Mommy to Coco and Rocco |
02-04-2008, 10:39 AM | #13 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Ontario,Canada
Posts: 626
| I'm sorry you are going through a break up but it sounds like it's the right thing for you. You don't want to be with someone who is hurtful and disrespectful of your emotions. If it didn't hurt you wouldn't be crying. If he doesn't understand this then you are better off without him. I know it's hard because you are still living under the same roof but try to avoid him as much as possible. Visit friends or family when you can. We are ALWAYS here if you need to talk. Good luck!!
__________________ ~Mary~ Mommy to Mindy 1 Years Old and Bear I Years Old "Proud Member of the Little Gentlemen's Club " |
02-04-2008, 01:52 PM | #14 | |
Donating YT 11K Club Member | Quote:
__________________ Primrose, Teddy..RIP, Livie..RIP, And can never forget my duo Sophie and London, Run in Peace <3 | |
02-04-2008, 02:07 PM | #15 | |
Aubrey's Mom Donating Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Georgia
Posts: 9,369
| Quote:
Thats soo true. I just got out of a 3 year relationship.. and I never thought that I was going to be able to end it with him. Yet I was able to. If you ever need anyone to talk to you can send me a message! Trust me, once you get on the other side its soo much better. You will see I didn't want to believe anyone when they tried to give me any advice I wanted to ignore it. | |
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