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Old 08-31-2007, 12:27 PM   #1
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Default Struggling a bit today

Today would have been my grandmother's 104th birthday. She died at the end of February of a broken heart. Her heart was broken when one of my uncles - 1 of grandma's 6 children died. She had lived 103 1/2 years & still had all her children.

I'm missing my grandma & confused about what to do this weekend when my family gathers for a picnic. This normally would have been for grandma's birthday party - but its been renamed a family reunion.

I want to take my 2 yorkies with me to the picnic, but I'm afraid my family will just think I'm nuts. I've been reading the thread from ilovelouie who was hurt by her niece who doesn't understand her passion for her dogs. I feel so much the same.

I hate having to go to work and leaving them at home (I got them when I worked form home & then later my employer changed my job description) - so when the weekend comes & I have to go to church & run errands, I really hate having to be gone any other times without my babies.

Especially, I feel awful going to a park (where the picnic will be held) without them - I feel like I'm betraying them if I'm in the great outdoors & they are looked up at home.

I don't know what to do....... (Even though it may be hard to hang onto the dogs & eat) And the other thing is I am really getting comfort from the dogs as I deal without my grandmother & don't want to be empty from that. (Plus, I'm a single mom & just sent my daughter off to college 11 hrs away - this is my 1st week without her & I really wish I was with her this weekend as she debuts as a featured baton twirler at their football game tomorrow. .... Trying not to through a pity party for myself )

I'm even taking the dogs with me in the car today when I go to the cemetery to leave flowers. I should add that grandma was sharp as a tack up to her last days & very vibrant & just the kindest, sweetest, smartest lady you would ever want to know.

I'm kind of feeling lost.........
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:30 PM   #2
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you were blessed to have had your g'ma for so long .... celebrate her life ... enjoy your doggies and go to the family picnic .... she lives on in your heart ...

that is so nice!!! wish I had my g'ma that long ....
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:33 PM   #3
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I am sorry for your loss. I lost my aunt last month, and she was closer to me than my own mother. This will be a rough holiday for your whole family. Just as your little stinkers have made it easier for you, seeing the little characters playing together could be a treat for many others in your family. If you are going to a park, there will plenty to do to entertain your babies; and if you have a playpen or crate for them, mealtime will be a snap. If someone seems upset by them ( I can't imagine how!!), just go for a nice walk with them and enjoy nature. It isn't like you are bringing them into someones house without their blessing, nature belongs to all of us two legged and four legged alike.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:33 PM   #4
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I'm sorry about grandma. That's tough.

About your yorkies...If I wanted to take them, I wouldn't worry what they thought. I'd do what made me happy.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:34 PM   #5
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I'm so sorry. I just wanted to send out warm healing thoughts your way.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:37 PM   #6
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Take your babies with you. When we go to family outings, we take Conner's stroller and put him in while we eat. Other times, we will put him on the leash and attach it to a picnic table (of course, being the type that worries, I attach two leashes to his harness)!!!

Your grandmother had a great life with a grandchild that cared for her as much as you did. Celebrate her life.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:37 PM   #7
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I lost a sister a couple of years ago and we had a big reunion there recently with all the family, we brought our babies and so did my cousin. There was quite a show put on and the attention was on the babies. Kept my mum and dad busy telling everyone about the house my hubbie built for the babies and the puppies we had so kinda broke the ice a bit.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:39 PM   #8
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I am sorry you lost your Grandma. I would take your yorkies with you they will give you comfort
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:40 PM   #9
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Do you have an x-pen you could set up? The family would prob enjoy seeing your babies.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:42 PM   #10
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I'd take your babies and if people don't understand to bad. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. Use this to celebrate your Grandmas life while she was here with you. Maybe bring some family photos to share.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:50 PM   #11
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Thank you for all your kind words!

I don't have an x-pen or a stroller. Not even sure I still have a big kennel - used to with past bigger dogs - I guess I'll have to check - lol

Or go by an x-pen or something. I just know everyone else will make fun of me and belittle me. Even my one aunt who always says she wants my dogs won't understand.
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Old 08-31-2007, 12:51 PM   #12
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I'm so sorry for your loss I'd take the babies and go to the picnic. I'd definitely go prepared for anything, though.

I hope you find comfort in sharing time with your family and babies this weekend.
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Old 08-31-2007, 01:12 PM   #13
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If you haven't read Dog is My Co-pilot yet, I definitely recommend it. My best friend happens to be a "non dog person" and I know what it feels like when people think we love our pups "too much". It's nice to know how other people deal with that whole "but it's just a dog" mentality.

Anyway, if you're more worried about what others will think then take your babies with you! On the other hand, if it's too much inconvenience or if the weather isn't appropriate for the pups (i.e. too hot), you can find a doggie day care in your area. I work at one and thankfully get to take my boy to work with me, but it's a great place for them to spend the day rather than leaving them alone.

Hope you enjoy the weekend. My DH lost his mom a couple years ago and what got him through it was celebrating her life rather than mourning her death.
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Old 08-31-2007, 01:20 PM   #14
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I cannot answer your questions -- so I'll send you an ehug instead I am so very sorry that you hurt. Time will help heal the hole in your heart left by your grandma's passing.
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Old 08-31-2007, 02:16 PM   #15
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I am so very sorry for your loss, it brought tears to my eyes. I lost my father in Jan 2006 to Cancer.

I would say to definately take your fur-babies with you. They will be your comfort and hopefully your family will understand...
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