Playing Devil's Advocate

[txshopper73]

I am truly trying to understand something.

You see threads where people are wanting to rehome their furbabies or get rid of them because the dog didn't turn out to be what they originally had in mind (e.g. bigger, smaller, wrong coat, coloring wrong, whatever reasons).

What I have seen is that people come to these threads and try to talk them into keeping the dog or flat out blast them for wanting to rehome. Now, I understand if someone is asking for advice on whether they should keep or get rid of the dog. However, what I do not understand is those that will take it upon themselves to get on their soapbox.

Maybe I'm wrong...but if someone has decided to get rid of/rehome their pup/dog, then by all means, DO IT! If they are entertaining the idea then their minds are pretty much made up. Why take the extra effort to try to make them feel bad for their decision?

Yes, I understand that having furbabies is a big responsibility and it should have been researched before making the committment. However, I'd rather someone rehome their pet than to keep the pet (because they felt guilty by something they read here) in an unloving home.

I see these threads and sometimes they are 10+ pages long of people telling them they should keep them or telling them how awful they are for even considering it. Sometimes I will post a reply of wishing them the best and then shake my head and move on at the responses.

Am I the only one that feels this way???????

[BubblPopElectrc]

Originally Posted by txshopper73

I am truly trying to understand something.

You see threads where people are wanting to rehome their furbabies or get rid of them because the dog didn't turn out to be what they originally had in mind (e.g. bigger, smaller, wrong coat, coloring wrong, whatever reasons).

What I have seen is that people come to these threads and try to talk them into keeping the dog or flat out blast them for wanting to rehome. Now, I understand if someone is asking for advice on whether they should keep or get rid of the dog. However, what I do not understand is those that will take it upon themselves to get on their soapbox.

Maybe I'm wrong...but if someone has decided to get rid of/rehome their pup/dog, then by all means, DO IT! If they are entertaining the idea then their minds are pretty much made up. Why take the extra effort to try to make them feel bad for their decision?

Yes, I understand that having furbabies is a big responsibility and it should have been researched before making the committment. However, I'd rather someone rehome their pet than to keep the pet (because they felt guilty by something they read here) in an unloving home.

I see these threads and sometimes they are 10+ pages long of people telling them they should keep them or telling them how awful they are for even considering it. Sometimes I will post a reply of wishing them the best and then shake my head and move on at the responses.

Am I the only one that feels this way???????

Maybe I have been missing the threads, but I feel like if anything, people are the opposite!

The only thread I can recall of with what you are mentioning is the one with the dog who is supposedly going to be to big (and she decided to keep).

[Mardelin]

Originally Posted by BubblPopElectrc

Maybe I have been missing the threads, but I feel like if anything, people are the opposite!

The only thread I can recall of with what you are mentioning is the one with the dog who is supposedly going to be to big (and she decided to keep).

It is very understandable that things happen. It's very unfortunate that some people choose to rehome a dog because it turned out to be too large, not the color they wanted, etc. Alot of the problem I blame on the breeder for not doing careful screening. As an exhibitor breeder I have a clause in my contract that I have the right of first refusal, should a situation arise that the owner cannot keep the pup, dog etc. I take the dog back and have the final say as to where the dog is rehomed to.

[Shelby&Seymour]

Originally Posted by Mardelin

It is very understandable that things happen. It's very unfortunate that some people choose to rehome a dog because it turned out to be too large, not the color they wanted, etc. Alot of the problem I blame on the breeder for not doing careful screening. As an exhibitor breeder I have a clause in my contract that I have the right of first refusal, should a situation arise that the owner cannot keep the pup, dog etc. I take the dog back and have the final say as to where the dog is rehomed to.

I agree ....... that is the way it should be!!! I commend you & hope that more breeders start taking on the same responsibility!

[BubblPopElectrc]

I didn't say that I thought it was right for someone to rehome their dog because they didn't do enough research (to be honest, I feel quite the opposite about it).

I said I didn't see many threads with people dogging them for rehoming a dog.

[sweetr72]

I usually try to encourage and be helpful the OP...I dont try to take sides or critisize their decisions or beliefs...they have a right to them as we all do..

The post that I thought you might be referring to about the new member who thinks she bought from a puppymill and was lied to about the size of her dog I did get on my "soapbox" for lack of a better term...to inform and hopefully help her understand that there is no way to predict the size of a yorkie...that is something she didnt realize. Her vet predicted a size and I stated that there was no sure fire way to know for sure...I just wanted her to hear that...I wasnt judging her decision whether or not to keep the dog..if she still wanted to rehome it...or anyone else for that matter..I would encourage him/her to do that...I dont bash anyone for their decision. I think that poster is very glad she got to hear things that she didnt know before she came to yorkietalk or at least it sounds like she is. In the end she is keeping him and loving him and thats great...now had she decided to not keep him I would have tried to give her advice on how to find him a great home...most posts I read everyone seems to be on the same page...there are a few here and there that might bash...but the non-bashers (not even a word lol) far outweigh the bashers....

My one sent...gave my other cent away earlier lol...

Dawn

[crystalsmom]

TXShopper, I agree with you on every level of your post. I probably know of the thread you may be thinking of.....

[Erin]

I think when someone comes on here and says they can't keep their dog due to medical/family/job/lifestyle change/etc. issues, people are supportive. People are sensitive to the "my dog didn't turn out the way I wanted" or they have unreasonable expectations (like a 4 month old to be housetrained). Loki is 12 pounds and I was told he'd be 7. He'd rather sleep in my bed than go shopping with me. But he's still my baby dog and I love him. I think people immediately think of how much they LOVE their not-so-perfect dog and feel somewhat offended. But there are all kinds of dog owners out there, many not quite as obsessed as us or those that see dogs and just dogs.

Sammy was re-homed from someone on YT. We love her SO MUCH. Rehoming is a difficult decision to make and in many cases it's the best decision. She's adjusted very well and I think she loves us too - considering she's sleeping on my pillow right now.

In the case of the 10 week old puppy that was posted earlier, i think people were just trying to explain that not all Yorkies are 5 pounds and even the 10 pound ones are very small dogs. This is kind of unique to Yorkies & small dogs. I don't think people would be so quick to give up a lab because it's 80 pounds instead of 60 or whatever. So when you look at it like that, it makes sense that people try to talk them out of it.

[Mardelin]

Originally Posted by Erin

I think when someone comes on here and says they can't keep their dog due to medical/family/job/lifestyle change/etc. issues, people are supportive. People are sensitive to the "my dog didn't turn out the way I wanted" or they have unreasonable expectations (like a 4 month old to be housetrained). Loki is 12 pounds and I was told he'd be 7. He'd rather sleep in my bed than go shopping with me. But he's still my baby dog and I love him. I think people immediately think of how much they LOVE their not-so-perfect dog and feel somewhat offended. But there are all kinds of dog owners out there, many not quite as obsessed as us or those that see dogs and just dogs.

Sammy was re-homed from someone on YT. We love her SO MUCH. Rehoming is a difficult decision to make and in many cases it's the best decision. She's adjusted very well and I think she loves us too - considering she's sleeping on my pillow right now.

In the case of the 10 week old puppy that was posted earlier, i think people were just trying to explain that not all Yorkies are 5 pounds and even the 10 pound ones are very small dogs. This is kind of unique to Yorkies & small dogs. I don't think people would be so quick to give up a lab because it's 80 pounds instead of 60 or whatever. So when you look at it like that, it makes sense that people try to talk them out of it.

There were plenty of times I wished I could have rehomed my human kids. They didn't turn out exactly like I had planned, but they are still wonderful.

I tend to look at my pups a bit differently, but how could I ever think of rehoming them, as they love me unconditionally.

[txshopper73]

Let me apologize to everyone here. I was NOT singleing ANYONE out! I have been a member here for over 2 years and "these" threads have gone on since the day that I joined (and I'm sure longer!). I truly hope that I haven't made anyone feel bad about anything. There is NOT one particular post that comes to mind...just the "feeling" of all of them. Again, I apologize so please don't take it personally! I was NOT pointing my finger at any one person

Back when I joined, there were many people that wanted to rehome their yorkie because of potty training issues. I realize that yorkies are THE WORST when it comes to potty training. My Gracie is over 3 years old and will still, to this day, find a pee pad in the house when it's raining outside.

In this case, if someone is wanting to rehome their dog because of this very problem, I say, DO IT. It's obvious that patience is not necessarily the forefront with this dog owner.

[Erin]

Originally Posted by txshopper73

Let me apologize to everyone here. I was NOT singleing ANYONE out! I have been a member here for over 2 years and "these" threads have gone on since the day that I joined (and I'm sure longer!). I truly hope that I haven't made anyone feel bad about anything. There is NOT one particular post that comes to mind...just the "feeling" of all of them. Again, I apologize so please don't take it personally! I was NOT pointing my finger at any one person

Back when I joined, there were many people that wanted to rehome their yorkie because of potty training issues. I realize that yorkies are THE WORST when it comes to potty training. My Gracie is over 3 years old and will still, to this day, find a pee pad in the house when it's raining outside.

In this case, if someone is wanting to rehome their dog because of this very problem, I say, DO IT. It's obvious that patience is not necessarily the forefront with this dog owner.

I agree these threads pop up every few days... I don't think you were singling anyone out. It's an interesting topic. Also, I notice that some people post how they realize they made a mistake and want what is best for their dog - rehoming it. Then there are people that want to sell their 8 month old dog for the $1500 they paid for it because it ate the shoes they left out. The tone of the original post plays a lot into people's responses. We are also a lot more supportive of a re-home of a long-term member vs. someone who comes on here trying to sell their dog because they are unhappy with it. There are so many factors that play into it, including the OP and the first few people's reactions to it.

I think you are right though, that if someone obviously cannot or does not want to keep their dog, we should not try to make them feel bad about it and should help the dog find a new home.

[karen171]

Originally Posted by txshopper73

I am truly trying to understand something.

You see threads where people are wanting to rehome their furbabies or get rid of them because the dog didn't turn out to be what they originally had in mind (e.g. bigger, smaller, wrong coat, coloring wrong, whatever reasons).

What I have seen is that people come to these threads and try to talk them into keeping the dog or flat out blast them for wanting to rehome. Now, I understand if someone is asking for advice on whether they should keep or get rid of the dog. However, what I do not understand is those that will take it upon themselves to get on their soapbox.

Maybe I'm wrong...but if someone has decided to get rid of/rehome their pup/dog, then by all means, DO IT! If they are entertaining the idea then their minds are pretty much made up. Why take the extra effort to try to make them feel bad for their decision?

Yes, I understand that having furbabies is a big responsibility and it should have been researched before making the committment. However, I'd rather someone rehome their pet than to keep the pet (because they felt guilty by something they read here) in an unloving home.

I see these threads and sometimes they are 10+ pages long of people telling them they should keep them or telling them how awful they are for even considering it. Sometimes I will post a reply of wishing them the best and then shake my head and move on at the responses.

Am I the only one that feels this way???????

No, you're not alone. I feel the same way. To me the best thing is to get the dog asap to a loving home where he will be appreciated, get the best care and the love he deserves. I hate to think of any dog being rejected and going without love just because the owner wanted something else but decides to keep the dog because of influence by others. It's not the dog's fault and he will probably sense that he is not really wanted. Dogs are living beings with feelings...not accessories. Also, there might be times when the owner doesn't wish to reveal the real circumstances of why they need to rehome...divorce, illness, etc. We should respect this and let them do what's best for everyone.

[peanut]

Your not alone...

[diggy4]

I had one upset me.....How do you feel about this? You see a thread about rehoming and for personal reasons they want to "rehome" the dog.....then later in a PM tell you it's not the everyday upkeep of the dog thats the problem they want to sell the dog to pay off debts? They are asking over 1,000 dollars for this dog??? This took place a long time ago, I dont even think this person posts anymore I am just curious if you all would have the same thoughts as I did?

I personally think selling is TOTALLY different than rehoming??? rehoming I would think you take a loss, selling for over a thousand, to me is trying to make money.

[HighlandYorkies]

Originally Posted by Mardelin

There were plenty of times I wished I could have rehomed my human kids. They didn't turn out exactly like I had planned, but they are still wonderful.

I tend to look at my pups a bit differently, but how could I ever think of rehoming them, as they love me unconditionally.

Great post Mardelin !
How true on both counts !
We try to do our best for our dogs, and hope others will do the same whether that to be keep or re-home....I know very genuine people who have had to give up a dog for it's own best interests and they were devastated - like Casper's Mum who I am still in contact with....she misses him so much, but she sold him to me so that he would not be attacked by her other stud dog....it was so hard for her, yet he has brought me nothing but joy.
I also know the owner who sold me Tammy, thankheavens for her as she was so neglected, though I suppose he loved her too, but couldn't take her to the Vets due to his beliefs.
Tara was the lucky one getting me who could keep her from the beginning.
As long as the dog ends up with a fab home in the end - it is the best thing to do if there is a reason why you cannot keep it.
Debra x x x x
Tara Casper Tammy