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Old 11-18-2006, 10:23 AM   #1
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Unlove Split Custody

Okay here is the situation. I love my two kids with all my heart but my partner is leaving me and moving 3 hours away. I cant stand the thought of not waking up every morning and letting my kids out to the bathroom. Or even coming home from work and hearing my little girl barking when i put my key in the door. Playing with my lilttle man man. And spending or first chirstmas together. Those dogs was my life. MY angle is only 4 months i cant even get the chance to watch her grow. Iam really hurt rigth. I know their just dogs but i raised them like they really was my kids. I really dont want them to go but my partner wants to leave. Is there a such thing of split custody with dogs?
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Old 11-18-2006, 10:25 AM   #2
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Sorry you are having to go through this! Who "owns" the dogs legally?
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Old 11-18-2006, 10:40 AM   #3
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well i signed for both dogs and my name is on the paper for his akc papers but so are hers. dont get me wrong i dont want to take them from her but i just want to be in there life also
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Old 11-18-2006, 10:48 AM   #4
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My parents divorced and they "shared" my dog, I was grown when this took place and my dad really loved Bucky he was a peikapoo. He would visit with him on weekends and he took care of all grooming he needed in the summer time, he would give him baths and take him to the vet. When Bucky had to be put down about 5 years ago (he was attacked my 2 dogs) He died in my dads arms. Bucky was 15 then. Sweet dog he was my childhood buddy.

It can be done my co-workers parents are going through divorce and they are sharing the dogs her dad see's them every other weekend.
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Old 11-18-2006, 10:56 AM   #5
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Why is she the one who takes them with her ? I know that both dogs grew up together but if worst comes to worst why don't you keep one each ?
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Old 11-18-2006, 11:00 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by POOH & DESTINY
well i signed for both dogs and my name is on the paper for his akc papers but so are hers. dont get me wrong i dont want to take them from her but i just want to be in there life also
Then I would definitely split the time. Although Toto is absolutely mine, legally, [Patrick wanted it that way because he bought her for me] she loves us equally. I would want her to spend time with him as well, but I would have to be the one with "full custody"!! Good luck, I hope it all works out. I can fully understand how heartbreaking the situation could be.
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Old 11-18-2006, 11:21 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Piccolo's mom
Why is she the one who takes them with her ? I know that both dogs grew up together but if worst comes to worst why don't you keep one each ?
That's exactly what I was thinking....what about you each taking one? I know that would be SUPER HARD though, because then you'd have to pick between them...and which ever one you DIDN'T take, you would probably feel really badly about BUT - I guess it has to be fair in some way huh? I am so sorry that you are having to go through this and I hope like heck that you guys can work it out about who gets the babies
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Old 11-18-2006, 11:28 AM   #8
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i think whoever takes care of them the most should keep them its not fair for the dogs to go back and forth or be split up
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Old 11-18-2006, 11:38 AM   #9
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i think whoever takes care of them the most should keep them its not fair for the dogs to go back and forth or be split up
That's another good point...it WOULD be kinda sad to see the little ones split up like that I didn't even THINK of that!!! I was just trying to think of the two of YOU - and trying to save you guys a little bit of heartache...but you really DO have to think about those babies too Whatever happens....I wish you all the best!
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Old 11-18-2006, 12:39 PM   #10
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i wouldn't want to share custody at all ..when you break up with someone well that's all there is too it as far as i'm concerned you really shouldn't have anything else to do with them there's a reason you break up to move on. but that's just the way i have always been & thought guess it's different for every person. i hope it works out for you whatever you choose.
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Old 11-18-2006, 05:33 PM   #11
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I'm assuming your partner wants them also, which is why you asked. That's a tough one. You mentioned one was only 4 months old, how old is the other one?

If the one is only four months, then you probably haven't had her all that long and they have bonded, but not as much as they could have. I would suggest you each take one if that's the case. If it's not and they've been together for awhile, then I'd say find a way to keep them together. You and your partner should really sit down and discuss what's going to be involved for their care. Whose schedule will accomidate them better and their health care, etc.

Good luck, I hope things work out.
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Old 11-18-2006, 07:14 PM   #12
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Thats a hard one. I know when my ex left, he took Bear, our yorkie, and gave him to his mother! It almost killed me. I loved Bear so much. But he said Bear belonged to him, cause he paid for him.

It took me about 3 years to get over the heartache to get another one. Since then, I even bought another one, so now I have 2.

I don't know how Bear is doing. Times my babies reminded me so much of Bear. He was one unforgettable dog, and my first yorkie.

I don't know what to say to you here. If both of you are attached to the dogs, do what your heart says to do. Its a hard decision. But I think joint custody could work for some.
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Old 11-18-2006, 08:36 PM   #13
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This is a hard one, and I hate to say this, but I would give up both before seperating them. They belong to you if they are registered in your name so the chose has to be yours. As for split costudy, I am all for it. We treat these little ones as our babies and if they were human babies you would have to share costudy unless one person was unfit.

Good luck, I hope everything works out for you...
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Old 11-19-2006, 01:13 PM   #14
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the other one is a boy his almost a year. i love them so much i dont want to lose them. They are both our first dogs. i just dont know what to do.
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Old 11-19-2006, 01:21 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by POOH & DESTINY
the other one is a boy his almost a year. i love them so much i dont want to lose them. They are both our first dogs. i just dont know what to do.
Well since it is your partner who is leaving...let her go but tell her the dogs stay especially since your name is on the papers. Sure, you dont want to keep her from them and blah blah blah but I am thinking about future terms. What if one day, if she has the dogs, she decides she doesnt want them anymore and gets rid of them WITHOUT YOUR KNOWLEDGE? Or what if she up and moves and you dont know where she is? What if she gets an attitude and ends the "split custody" thing? I would just let her come and visit. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. If she wants to come see them, fine. If she doesnt, that's fine, too! It's true that we treat these as our human babies and I can guarantee that no one would get them let alone my furbabies!!! Just my opinion, tho. My mom says I can be too opinionated...I hope this isn't the case here. It just tugs my heart!!!
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