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05-31-2006, 07:44 PM | #1 |
YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Rancho Viejo, Tx
Posts: 2,698
| condolences.. do they help? absolutely!! when one of our fur friends has passed, we all feel sorrow. no matter how long they have been a member. We never know what to say. How do you put the words so that they are a comfort to those left behind? (you all know I am not good with words but I wanted to try and say this.) My mother had alzheimers, parkinsons & congestive hear failure. she passed a couple of years ago. I have had the worse time dealing with this. I can't get past it. I have been mad a God. why was she given such a hard life? why did she have to go through such a horrible disease? As good a person as she was! Why? My mother was exceptional. (I will try to keep this short.)She lost her mother when she was 14 yrs old and was forced to raise her 2 siblings. she cooked, cleaned, ironed, etc for other people too. had to quit school to do all this. Any time she felt needed by anyone, she was right there putting her self last. she was a preacher to the preacher, that is how religious she was. we tried keeping her in her home as long as we could. I traveled 5 hours one way every week to stay a few days at a time to help care for her. when one of us would leave, one of the others would replace. chain care giving , I guess you would call it. she got to the point where we felt she was better off in a nursing home. (I am the only one who regrets doing this). sometimes when I would visit, she would be just sitting there alone. where ever they had placed her. this is how she passed. alone. I was reading on the condolences to one of the fur friends that had passed and came across one at actually helped me.........It was like a light had turned on.....almost like my mother was sitting there reading this post to me.... when one of our yorkies pass, I never know what to say. I feel so bad for the owners and friends who have to deal with this loss. Baby Blessing , one of your postings started me over, what I think, is a bridge to dealing with the loss of my mother. I hope your words have helped others as much as it has me. Thank you so much!
__________________ Buckeye, Ahia, Tressie, Archie & LDenise Dogs are really people with short legs in fur coats |
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05-31-2006, 08:37 PM | #2 |
Inactive Account Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: MD
Posts: 2,985
| We never know when and what we might say or do that will be the perfect thing a grieving person will respond to. But, even when we think we don't have the words, our presence, either physically or presence by our thoughts and prayers, help to ease te pain. God works that way.. |
05-31-2006, 09:15 PM | #3 |
Inactive Account Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Orange County, CA
Posts: 4,387
| Idenise, I'm so happy to hear you are on your way to find less sorrow and more happiness in your heart. Your mother was truly a remarkable woman and she has been rewarded in Heaven. We don't understand why some people is made to suffer so much while on this earth. But I do know they have an eternity of living in Gods Glory. She must be so proud of you. Patti (Baby Blessing) is truly a "Blessing" to us all. She has the wonderful gift to express her empathy for those of us in need. Her word are an echo of our hearts, she is able to take our emotions and show us how to put it in perspective towards healing. Her words are guided and anointed by Jesus's Hand and Love for each person she can reach out to. With Patti, I feel like I have a second mom. I know when she reads my word, she can see what I didn't write and is not afraid to ask or give comfort. She will not scold or give unwanted advise. Not an ill word will she type. Please include Patti & Jack in your daily prayers for Jack's healing and a long life together surrounded by happiness and love. There is a beautiful Memorial Poem she had written and shared with us on Yorkie Talk. If you haven't read it yet here is the link to her thread: http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=42648 God Bless You Patti & Jack I Love both very much! Corinne York
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06-01-2006, 05:30 AM | #4 |
YT Addict Join Date: May 2006 Location: foss, ok
Posts: 321
| How nice of you to share this story. Your mother sounds like she was a remarkable woman. Sending lots of good thoughts your way.
__________________ Bumblebees Mommy |
06-01-2006, 05:37 AM | #5 |
Donating YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: NJ
Posts: 4,021
| I just wanted to say that condolences absolutly help! When Bandit died no one in my "real" world understood what I was feeling. As I read, even a simple "Sorry to hear" each one touched my heart and helped me to heal. the funny thing is, when my mom died 4 years ago I was terrible at condolences. I just wanted people to stop talking about it. Every time someone brought up her passing I would just start crying again. I hated getting cards in the mail. It was just too painful. But, after a few weeks when my mind started to accept what had happened I did appreciate every kind word. I guess it's different for every person.
__________________ Teri Owned by and completely devoted to Tucker... Maddie, we will always love you Bandit, you are always in my heart Proud Member SSLS |
06-01-2006, 06:07 AM | #6 |
Donating YT 10K Club Member | Yes, condolences help....whenever someone suffers a loss....some of my posts may be longer than others, simply because I have been in a similar situtation and maybe by sharing that....will help someone feel a tiny bit better. When Trace died...I appreciated each and every post or pm that was sent to me. Some people I "knew" and some I didn't...but how nice that all felt a need to express their sympathy. And Teri when my mom died....I opened the cards, but didn't read anything but who they were from. I saved them all...and a couple of years later read through them. One friend had written something so wonderful....that I felt guilty for not commenting on it immediately....but two years after, I did. To IDenise, I am truly sorry about your mother's passing, and am glad you found some comfort here.
__________________ Deb, Reese, Reggie, Frazier, Libby, Sidney, & Bodie Trace & Ramsey who watch over us www.biewersbythebay.com |
06-01-2006, 06:19 AM | #7 |
& Bailey & Bella Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Ohio
Posts: 8,164
| I think they do help, also, and it helps us to offer our sympathy also, because we know that we all feel the same way about our furbabies, or we wouldn't be obsessed with YT, like we are.. We all put ourselves in each others position,, knowing and dreading the fact that someday it will be us.. When bchgirl's, Trace passed away, it bummed me out for days, it was so unreal to me and unbelievable, that entire weekend, I held Bailey more, hugged and kissed him more,thinking what that day will be like,and how horrible it will be, yet knowing I have friends here, who will be here for me,and be able to understand my pain and sorrow, totally.
__________________ Rhonda, Bailey, Josie and my angel Bella Rue' "Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." ~Anatole France~ |
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