Visit not going well

[Zoiesmom11]

I'm visiting my parents and brought the puppy along, without asking my dad cause I knew he would not like it. My mom had said I should just bring her with me and my dad isn't the discussing type he just fumes under his breath and tells my mom and sister that he's unhappy about her being there. I keep her outside (even though It's 90 plus outside) and we've picked up her poop and tried to minimize her barking. We've been here 4 days or so and she's calming down and slept all night last night in her kennel in the room we were sleeping in. She only whined to go pee!!! That was great because the previous nights she wouldn't even be quiet in her kennel which she sleeps in at home. I thought I was going to have to leave my parents house it was so bad!!!
I am willign to listen to any advice, but you dont' know my dad and it's not like we have serious conversations except when something serious happens. He's just not a talker. He finally said to me, I'm not mad at you, we'll work this out so I'm planning on staying now I guess. I've just been so stressed out and Zoie has been such a good girl I'd hate to see how he'd act if she'd been bad.

[Chelsey]

Shower Zoie with love, don't be mad at her because your nervs are on edge and yell at her for the slightest thing, she feels the tentions. Hold her close and talk to her, assure her that YOU love her.

Hope things turn out ok, it's a bummer to be in that situation, because you love your Dad and want to please him, at the same time you love your baby and want the best for her. Take her for walks if possible, that might make her tired so she will be quiet in the house

Good luck

[GeorgiesMomma]

I know how you feel my Dad isn't an animal lover at all and isn't the talking type either. I would just leave him a note maybe and say I know you were not happy with Zoie coming along, but I hope you understand how much she means to me. I appreciate your patience with US and love you for letting her stay here too. I usually write how I feel to my Dad since that is seems to be the best way to get his attention. Good luck and give Zoie a lot of love

[red98vett]

That's a tough one - how many more days are you going to be there ?

I liked the idea of taking walks - maybe your dad and you and Lola can take a walk together and you can talk to him ? That may give him a chance to see you with your pet and you can explain how much this is bothering you.

Also - and I do NOT want to hurt your feelings - but.... please be careful leaving her outside if it's that hot. Yorkies aren't meant for extreme cold and heat - they really can dehydrate quickly.....Maybe you could find a place in the house for the rest of your visit ? Your dad wouldn't want anything happening to her I'm sure - so maybe try to work that out so she isn't outside all day ?

It's hard when our families don't understand....I would NOT bring her on more trips but work out what you can on this one and try to enjoy it since you're there....GOOD LUCK !!

[ldenise]

my dad would have been the same way. (he passed years ago). He was the kind of person who thought all dogs need to live out side. I am totally the opposite. If you had an indoor dog, he would not eat at your house.
It is dangerous to leave them out side. I don't think I would do that. maybe try a gate. put her in a laundry room or some place where she will be out of his way. If you have to leave her outside, maybe put a fan on her with lots of water and check her often.
send dad on a long errand.........party time. (only joking).

[Happyjack]

Originally Posted by ldenise

my dad would have been the same way. (he passed years ago). He was the kind of person who thought all dogs need to live out side. I am totally the opposite. If you had an indoor dog, he would not eat at your house.

My Dad was the same way....dogs belonged OUTSIDE period. No acceptions. I tried to visit my parents a couple of times with my 2 Yorkies.....then I gave up. I refused to abuse them by leaving them outside in the heat (summer) or cold (like Christmas). I didn't see my Dad for years....because he would not come to my home either....I mean gosh...DOGS lived here. We were at an impass I wouldn't leave my dogs...and Dad would not allow them to visit. Finally after about 3 or 4 years....he decided he had to accept my dogs or he was never going to see his daughter again. Then an amazing thing happened....he fell in love with the Yorkies. Once he gave himself a chance to get to know the Yorkies...he WANTED them to visit. Good luck!

[Zoiesmom11]

Yes, I had thought of that too!!! I've been bringing her in to nap in her crate during the day some. She's calmed down alot since we've been here and we're here for two more weeks. :-)
She's slept in her crate ALL night last night and even slept in and then went to pee outside this morning without any accidents. I'm so glad she's warming up to the place.
I can't spend alot of time with her outside because I'm visiting my sister and her new baby and we've had alot of company. Zoie isn't lonely at least. The kids play outside alot so she has company.

[SnowWa]

QUOTE: I'm visiting my parents and brought the puppy along, without asking my dad cause I knew he would not like it...."
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Looks like you encountered some of the problems that you might have expected. And - seems like you have had a very stressful visit to me - along with trying to get in a lot of dog training during your visit (instead of prior to your visit).

I, personally, wouldn't want to take a pup any place it's not welcome. Even if my dad didn't talk a lot -- I would have least got him on the phone and got his okay before I came visiting with my pup.

I have a girlfriend who has three daschunds (whom she says have ruined her carpets peeing). She called and wanted to visit me with her three dogs for a week, and I told her "No way!!!!" I already have two dogs that are far from perfectly house trained, and the last thing in the world I want in my house for a week is "three more." I just flat out told her that she can come as stay as long as she wants -- but not her three peeing dogs! I told her that I'm sure I'd love her dogs, but if I spend a week with them, it's going to be at her house, not mine. (And - I am a laid back person and certainly not the pickest housekeeper in the world either. I just think three more peeing dogs are a little more than most people can stand.) It did kind of surprise me that my friend would even want to take her "untrained dogs" to other people's houses. That's not a thoughtful thing to do - right?

If either of my parents didn't want my dogs at their house - I'd respect their wishes and not take them there. And -- my feelings wouldn't be hurt at all.

So --- I just think you set yourself up for trouble... by not respecting your father's wishes - in his own home. Sorry.....

Carol Jean

[Zoiesmom11]

WEll, while I didn't discuss it with my dad, my mom asked me what I'd be doing with Zoie and said I'd just have to bring her with me. Usually things go through my mom since dad doesn't ask questions. So, I assumed, like ALWAYs that DAd had been forewarned.
Zoie is only 5 months old so I did as much training as I could before I got her here. I was trying everything to get her potty trained (see potty training posts).
She hasn't had ONE accident while being here and played very well with newly acquainted family members today.
So, things are going much better and dad said he's not mad and we'll make it work!

[GeorgiesMomma]

I am very happy to hear that I have a Dad like that too. Stubborn set in his ways and doesn't do well with discussing things. Hope you enjoy the rest of your trip!

[Zoiesmom11]

Thanks so much. I need the support!!!

[RLC12345678]

Are you still leaving her outside? I hope she's not getting too hot. Maybe since the initial shock of bringing the doggie with you has passed, you could start bringing her inside more, maybe a little bit at a time. I like the idea of taking her on walks, then when she is tired out bring her inside to rest. I also like the idea of leaving your dad a little note. It could just be short and sweet like "Thanks for putting up with my doggie and me the past couple of days!" or something short and sweet like that. Please let us know how things go as the days pass! GOOD LUCK!!

[Bailey's Peeps]

Originally Posted by Zoiesmom11

I'm visiting my parents and brought the puppy along, without asking my dad cause I knew he would not like it...

My heart breaks for your Dad. Not because you didn't talk with him first, but because he's closed himself off from the joys that a pet (especially a Yorkie) can bring.

I'm an OLD guy (nearing retirement age, anyway), and my wife and I got our first Yorkie this month. Actually, Bailey was my wife's mother's day present. Until we picked her up, I just thought of her as Kathie's present. That attitude went out the window almost the minute we saw her. Now, my wife is quick to point out that I'm the one that goes nuts over this puppy and has a tendency to spoil her rotten.

I hope your Dad reaches a point where he loosens up with Zoie. If he ever does, the biggest danger is that he'll start wanting to go out and find a Yorkie for himself.

[dezertblu]

I know the situation is hard on both you and your baby, but maybe it will help if you try to see it this way, she is learning a new lesson in life as are you, she has to learn she can't always be with you and that sometimes she won't be in the most ideal of situations, going through this early in life will actually make it easier for her to adapt to changes that she may have to encounter in the future.I take Moe to his "grandparents" but they luckily are big time dog people. They have a dog that I know would kill Moe in seconds, so I have to keep Moe in a crate for allot of time, until thier dog wants out, then Moe gets his turn.He is learning it's not only him on the planet and that sometimes other things or beings have to come first..it's not a bad lesson to learn early in life.I sure hope things get better durring your visit.

[GeorgiesMomma]

Originally Posted by Bailey's Peeps

My heart breaks for your Dad. Not because you didn't talk with him first, but because he's closed himself off from the joys that a pet (especially a Yorkie) can bring.

I'm an OLD guy (nearing retirement age, anyway), and my wife and I got our first Yorkie this month. Actually, Bailey was my wife's mother's day present. Until we picked her up, I just thought of her as Kathie's present. That attitude went out the window almost the minute we saw her. Now, my wife is quick to point out that I'm the one that goes nuts over this puppy and has a tendency to spoil her rotten.

I hope your Dad reaches a point where he loosens up with Zoie. If he ever does, the biggest danger is that he'll start wanting to go out and find a Yorkie for himself.

That is a great post my fiance' talks baby talk to Georgie it's funny to see a grown man act like that with a 3 1/2lb dog! Welcome to YT