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02-01-2006, 07:31 PM | #1 |
YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: West Virginia
Posts: 1,119
| "Dear God" a Dogs Prayer DEAR GOD, TO: GOD FROM: THE DOG Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story? Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"? Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog? Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand? Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please. Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize? Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog. 1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up. 2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. 3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty. 4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. 5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps. 6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. 8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration. 9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello". 11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table. 12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after. 13. I will not throw up in the car. 14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt. 15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company. 16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing. And, finally, My last question . Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?
__________________ LeeAnn Harley Remember.. Dog is God Spelled Backwards |
Welcome Guest! | |
02-01-2006, 07:36 PM | #2 |
Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: San Diego CA
Posts: 57
| That is too funny!!!
__________________ Crystal , Homer 1 yr & Kady 11 weeks |
02-01-2006, 07:59 PM | #3 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Texas
Posts: 231
| I love that! Had to copy it.
__________________ Stephanie & Gracie Gracie at Dogster: http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?j=t&i=243694 http://jewelryforfurbabies.bravehost.com/ |
02-01-2006, 08:41 PM | #4 |
YT Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Georgia
Posts: 335
| Thats so cute and funny |
02-01-2006, 09:15 PM | #5 |
Luv My Bug! Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: california
Posts: 1,573
| AWESOME1 |
02-01-2006, 09:20 PM | #6 |
My Heart, My Life, My Dogs Donating Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: El Paso,TX
Posts: 759
| That last part is truely amazing definatly have to make a copy
__________________ Jessi and my 4 's SugarBear's Taz Gizmo's Gidget |
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