Let's talk about safe playmates, would love everyone's input

[Lilah Charm]

Hi guys! I would like to talk about safe playmates for a small breed dog like the Yorkshire terrier. I don't want to coddle my dog and make her afraid of big dogs but I also don't want to expose her to a dangerous situation (even a playful, friendly larger dog who say, likes to paw when he plays) have my dog get hurt and also be afraid of large dogs.

I would really like everyone's input and experiences. Firstly- what makes a good safe playmate? What rules out a safe playmate? How do you limit interaction of your dog is exposed to a playmate that you don't think is a good match for him/her (like at your aunts Fourth of July bbq) without showing your dog to be fearful? What about at a meet and greet- like just a sniff and sit while your owners talk, then continue walking? What about if a dog gets too close or excited in that sniff and greet and your dog snaps/snarls- what is a safe warning vs being aggressive?

What are your guys experiences with dog playmate pairing and interaction? Do you live with two littles or a yorkie and a mastiff? Does your yorkie hate the blue heeler next door but is best friends with the pitbull at the park? I would love to hear more about your dogs social/playmate experiences, what you think works and doesn't and how you support your dog/s in those different situations. Thanks guys!

[Bamboo15]

I have two yorkies. I would honestly only be comfortable letting mine play with other small dogs. Even if the larger dog is friendly I would worry about the Yorkie getting hurt if the play got too rough. The only later dog mine have been around is my aunt's 30 pound miniature labradoodle. I don't know that I would allow mine to actually play with any dog larger than that. My mom had a Yorkie when she was younger that died after playing with a larger dog. The dog shook the Yorkie and it actually died from the shaking.

[Maximo]

Knowing what is safe is what's not is such a tough call. I prefer to limit my boys' interactions to mostly dogs close to their size. One exception is our neighbor's Collie. He is the gentlest, relaxed dog, and I trust his human completely. She is an advanced dog trainer.

I have learned to be on guard even with smaller dogs. Puppies usually want to paw at my boys' faces. Not good with their sharp nails! We have some crazy mini Doxies nearby who acted like they wanted to latch onto my boys' faces, bite.

Max was friends with a Westie, but at some point they started challenging each other. Whenever you see the dogs go nose to nose, locking eyes, they are challenging one another. Tail wagging can be a battle flag too, not always a sign of happiness.

Ears down and back can be a sign of deference or fear.

I wouldn't be comfortable with my boys running free with big dogs. Too much risk for an unintended accident.

My boys always love other Yorkies.

[Jkpal]

Piper, too, likes other little dogs, but her sheer joy is running into another Yorkie (or Yorkie-type)! She's over-the-moon when seeing a Yorkie and the difference in her attitude is obvious and distinctive whenever it happens-- I swear it's like she's meeting up with a long-lost fellow kinsman or something! And yet, happy though she is to meet and greet another Yorkie, Piper is always the first one to continue moving on her way. After observing the antics of larger dogs, I simply would not allow Piper to 'play' with them; too many ways for her to get hurt. An accidental injury from a friendly dog would be as devastating as an intentional injury from an aggressive dog...What's that saying, "Let's even the playing field?" Yes, I would choose evenly matched for my girl. When it comes to Pipe (especially after the Akita grab), I'm not taking any chances.

[KairaPup]

I live with three dogs. A chihuahua, a chihuahua/yorkie mix, and a heeler mix. Respectively they weigh 5 lbs, 6 lbs, and 20 lbs.

The tinies can play with large dogs, but only approved ones. I won't let them play with just any random dog I see. My yorkie cross, Kaira, in particular. She's a service dog and she's very docile. Will not defend herself from other dogs even if they're aggressive or rude. My chihuahua will defend himself and will not hesitate to bite if he needs to, but she will just lay on her back or wait for me to help her.

So, I let them play with dogs I know well and trust. Kaira's best friend is a border collie who is my friend's service dog. She plays well with my mom's large mixed breed dog as well and my aunt's huge hound dog.

Even small dogs, if I don't trust them, I will remove Kaira. I take her to the park often and it's usually very safe. I work with dogs, so I can read their language, and I stay right with her while she plays. If a dog comes in that I don't like the looks of, I'll leave.

As far as what makes a safe playmate- does the dog have good motor skills? A 6 month old massive dog might be too wiggly to be safe. Does the dog listen? If it gets carried away can it be called off? How does it react to small running dogs? Does it understand not to bite too hard in play with a little dog? For other little dogs, how hard does it play? Does it read body language well? Is the other dog easily offended and could turn and snap for some made up reason? Kaira got bit at the park by a dog she was playing with who all of a sudden decided she was no longer interested, and it did draw blood. Does the dog hump excessively? Do they have well matched play styles, or is another dog a better choice? Are they taking turns? Healthy play usually will have them alternate who is on the ground during wrestling. If one dog is dominating the situation, pinning the other dog and they are not alternating, it's no longer good play and needs to have a human step in.

[Jkpal]

KairaPup -- Wow, thanks for excellent information on what to watch for when around other dogs. I found your post to be enlightening and know it will be very helpful overall.

[Lilah Charm]

I am enjoying the responses, thanks you guys. Kairapup, I really appreciate your pointed reasoning for how you make decisions about healthy safe playmates for your little ones. What are ways you guys- especially those who feel only smaller playmates suit- avoid close interaction with the big dogs whilst preventing creating a neurotic dog? Do you use a carrier or a stroller? Do you feel leashed sniffs and hellos are safe? Do you pick your dog up- if you do, do they perceive the other dog as a threat? Do they want to say hi or do they not mind being disallowed to say hello? Does his happen at a park? Do you walk away? What about if you are visiting a family members house who has a less than ideal companion? Really enjoying the responses, thanks again!

[Jkpal]

Piper has always been pretty confident around dogs--not pushy, but comfortable. However, after being grabbed (out of my arms) by an Akita and seeing first hand how unbelievably fast it happened, I no longer let any large dog close to Pipe, nor does she want them too near to her. I do not believe I'm making Piper neurotic; she doesn't act timid or fearful, just much more wary. As I said, seeing the speed in which a dog can grab, lunge, etc., has ensured we keep plenty of space between us and them. And yes, I now pick Piper up whenever a large dog pointedly approaches. It's a relatively new way of behavior for us, but the one that works best for us.

[KairaPup]

If I visit someone with a less than ideal dog, I will hold my girl on my lap or carry her as needed. Since I can't safely be separated from her, if it's really serious I may ask the other person to confine their dog instead for the duration of our visit. But, none of my friends or family have dogs that I am uncomfortable with, even though they are mostly very large, so it's not really a situation I deal with often.

[Lilah Charm]

Originally Posted by Jkpal

Piper has always been pretty confident around dogs--not pushy, but comfortable. However, after being grabbed (out of my arms) by an Akita and seeing first hand how unbelievably fast it happened, I no longer let any large dog close to Pipe, nor does she want them too near to her. I do not believe I'm making Piper neurotic; she doesn't act timid or fearful, just much more wary. As I said, seeing the speed in which a dog can grab, lunge, etc., has ensured we keep plenty of space between us and them. And yes, I now pick Piper up whenever a large dog pointedly approaches. It's a relatively new way of behavior for us, but the one that works best for us.

My sweet little Lilah Charm was actually attacked by a large dog (pure white,, maybe a husky, we were on leash just minding our own business walking by and he slipped his owners hand and went straight for my girl) when she was eighteen months old and has never been the same. That is part of why I query to my friends here at YT. Retrospectively, although she had excellent people socialization, kids, farmyard animals, cats, loud noises etc, I feel like I didn't provide her with a strong enough social base with other dogs and that if she had had a stronger base line she would have snapped back better. I thought we were good, we had met and spent time with dogs, even big dogs and I felt like we had met our mark but after Lilahs attack she has never been the same in the social dog relationship department. She has a couple of friends, but even those relationships have their areas of strain. And in my case, I do think I have contributed to her anxiety because we are very bonded and I have had a lot of stress about it. I want to protect her but I also want to support her social relationships and I feel like I need more conclusive decisions about safe social guidelines and I want input from a broad range of folks who have the same special kind of dog as I do to take into consideration with my own experiences and feelings on the matter. Thanks for all of your valuable input guys

[Jayspee]

I'm also concerned about bigger dogs and injury. About 10 weeks ago, my yorkie girl was bitten by another dog. They were both off the lead when they met, sniffed and then ignored each other whilst waiting for the humans to stop talking and get on with the walk.

Out of the blue after a few minutes I heard a yelp from my dog and she moved behind me, the other dog carried on lying by her ball. Thankfully the wound has healed, the fur is growing back and she seems every bit as confident and sociable as before.
My dog will let the other dog know if that's enough sniffing and she will move away first then if they persist she will snap. My worry is about playful puppies and bigger dogs who ignore a telling off and keep bothering her as I'd hate her to be aggressive towards them or to incite aggression from them. Any advice?

[gemy]

Originally Posted by Lilah Charm

My sweet little Lilah Charm was actually attacked by a large dog (pure white,, maybe a husky, we were on leash just minding our own business walking by and he slipped his owners hand and went straight for my girl) when she was eighteen months old and has never been the same. That is part of why I query to my friends here at YT. Retrospectively, although she had excellent people socialization, kids, farmyard animals, cats, loud noises etc, I feel like I didn't provide her with a strong enough social base with other dogs and that if she had had a stronger base line she would have snapped back better. I thought we were good, we had met and spent time with dogs, even big dogs and I felt like we had met our mark but after Lilahs attack she has never been the same in the social dog relationship department. She has a couple of friends, but even those relationships have their areas of strain. And in my case, I do think I have contributed to her anxiety because we are very bonded and I have had a lot of stress about it. I want to protect her but I also want to support her social relationships and I feel like I need more conclusive decisions about safe social guidelines and I want input from a broad range of folks who have the same special kind of dog as I do to take into consideration with my own experiences and feelings on the matter. Thanks for all of your valuable input guys

"Razzle has lived with two big dogs for almost eight years. I do not let them play together mostly! Sure they are in the house freely with each other. I never pick up my dog. Instead I intersperse my body if a larger dog at a leash free is being too rough. At home my large dogs are taught to obey commands.

Prey drive is important to assess. I have one large dog with a big prey drive and one not so much. She is never allow d off lead with raze.

The only activity they are allowed to do together is water retrieve.

Before we go into a leash free park I observe the dogs and owners. Then I decide to go in or not.

So I look at owner attentiveness to their dog. If owners are sitting on a bench texting and their dog is running around like a hellion , nope not today for us.

I also assess dogs obedience training. Sit. Come. Stay.

On walks when a big dog is approaching, I short leash in razzle to my side and try for as much space between the passing dogs.

I hope this helps

[Lilah Charm]

Originally Posted by gemy

"Razzle has lived with two big dogs for almost eight years. I do not let them play together mostly! Sure they are in the house freely with each other. I never pick up my dog. Instead I intersperse my body if a larger dog at a leash free is being too rough. At home my large dogs are taught to obey commands.

Prey drive is important to assess. I have one large dog with a big prey drive and one not so much. She is never allow d off lead with raze.

The only activity they are allowed to do together is water retrieve.

Before we go into a leash free park I observe the dogs and owners. Then I decide to go in or not.

So I look at owner attentiveness to their dog. If owners are sitting on a bench texting and their dog is running around like a hellion , nope not today for us.

I also assess dogs obedience training. Sit. Come. Stay.

On walks when a big dog is approaching, I short leash in razzle to my side and try for as much space between the passing dogs.

I hope this helps

Gail, I had hoped so much that you would share your input! Thank you I want to keep Lilah safe and support her social relationships without having expectations that are unrealistic or unsafe for her- ah the balance between over protective and appropriately protective. As you know, I one day aspire to have a show gal as well and (as I am sure everyone says) I want to do everything just right! Lol, boy grooming was a learning curve on a road I had to take before I could ever think of advancing in that arena! Lilah has been a sweetheart to help me learn all these things Your advice resonates with me, I have a lot of respect for your knowledge. Thank you!

[gemy]

Originally Posted by Lilah Charm

Gail, I had hoped so much that you would share your input! Thank you I want to keep Lilah safe and support her social relationships without having expectations that are unrealistic or unsafe for her- ah the balance between over protective and appropriately protective. As you know, I one day aspire to have a show gal as well and (as I am sure everyone says) I want to do everything just right! Lol, boy grooming was a learning curve on a road I had to take before I could ever think of advancing in that arena! Lilah has been a sweetheart to help me learn all these things Your advice resonates with me, I have a lot of respect for your knowledge. Thank you!

You are more than welcome. I am a much better teacher in person, than typing.

I like to be prepared, by forward planning different scenarios in my mind. What do I do when? With our Yorkies bc of their size and temperament many can be at risk. But on the other hand so are big ones. I think the key is to be calmly alert when out n about.

I was really angry, when razz an d I were pat training! I don't know what warned me, but we had just finished the cavaletti training, and I looked behind me and there was an out of control blackie in full prey mode! I pulled razz forward. Stepped behind him, but also saw two young men on the chase. This should not happen!!!! I knew what I would do, whatever side she went to I would spin and kick her in the face. Sounds harsh? Not to me. The men got control of her and then I went to her owner and gave her a piece of my mind! Training is supposed to be a safe place! I would lay my life down for my dogs and they for me.

Now having told you a scared story, this happens very rarely. I train my dogs from early
Puppyhood to obey and they earn the right to be free in our home, or anywhere else.

[Cats307]

Max just turned 8 weeks old. The first day he visited his cousin the Beagle (40 lbs) and their new kitten. Loved them both. The beagle was so careful and never really got close just ran around him. The next day was introduced to his grandmas 30 lb mixed breed and a Pomeranian. The Pom was the smallest dog and the one that just sat and watched him. Benji the mixed bread lived him and the played and played. Now is other cousins is a King Charles, a small dog no idea what he is and a Siberian husky. He won't be playing with the husky even though they said when they got a kitten Nikki was great. Just don't trust her. Forgot he met his other shiz tzu cousin that didn't think he was all that cute and just glared at him. So in his first week with us met no one he didn't wag his tail at... Some played and were gentle and some uninterested in this bundle of joy.
I figured he would clue me in if it was too rough and I would step in. But was really the other way around... He was kind of rough on all his playmates. Those little teeth hurt!