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03-30-2015, 03:41 PM | #1 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: San Jose CA USA
Posts: 129
| It's been exactly 4 weeks since I lost my little girl. She died 28 days and 10 minutes ago in my arms after a five year battle with kidney failure. I knew it was getting close and took her to the vet the morning of the day she died. The vet said she wasn't in pain and still seemed to be responsive to me and she still wanted to be held. He advised she would probably just go to sleep and not wake up. And she did...5 hours later. I still cry everyday. It was awful to hold her and feel her body temperature going down and her heartrate slowing but I know that's what SHE wanted..to be held as long as possible....and to pass in her home where she was most comfortable. I am simply grateful I didn't have to make the decision to put her to sleep or not. I think I will always miss Chanel. Any suggestions on dealing with grief? I am planning on getting another one and am flying to get her next week. I sure hope that helps fill the void because right now there is a HUGE one in my life.
__________________ "Roxie" my adorable girl & WELCOME "Rascal" the Holy terrier RIP Chanel 4/2003-3/2015 Last edited by oneofakind864; 03-30-2015 at 03:43 PM. |
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03-30-2015, 03:52 PM | #2 |
♥ Love My Tibbe! ♥ Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: D/FW, Texas
Posts: 22,140
| I'm sorry for your terrible loss and like most of the others here, know exactly what you are going through and how you are hurting. The loss if almost unbearable right now. Indulge yourself by crying and grieving as long as you need, as once the shock wears off, sad reality really hits home. Talk about her life and death, exchange stories about things she did and get your painful feelings out. It really helps you face and deal with your loss. Eventually, your healing from grief begins and slowly, sweet, happy memories will gradually take over the bad ones. Having a little puppy in the house should help you keep your mind busy dealing with the practical and totally fun part of getting to know another dog who really needs you. Rest in peace, Chanel.
__________________ Jeanie and Tibbe One must do the best one can. You may get some marks for a very imperfect answer: you will certainly get none for leaving the question alone. C. S. Lewis |
03-30-2015, 04:06 PM | #3 |
Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: England
Posts: 46
| I'm sorry for the loss of your baby I know the same feeling, I sadly had to put Candi to sleep in 2013 she was 13 years old. It broke my heart and I still miss her lots now. The house was just too quiet so I decided to get another Yorkie a month after she died. That's when I got my gorgeous boy Rolo, he has helped me so much after Candi's death. In time the pain gets better and your new little girl will help ease the pain. |
03-30-2015, 04:35 PM | #4 |
YT Addict | I'm so sorry about your loss. I went through your photos of Chanel, what a beautiful little girl - it is SO obvious she was so loved. I suggest this book to everyone, it really helped me (mostly the author's personal story) when my Tinkebell was diagnosed with cancer in November: "Biblical Proof Animals Do Go To Heaven" by Steven H. Woodward Biblical Proof Animals Do Go To Heaven: Steven H.... I'm happy to hear you will be getting another little one, I'm sure they will fill your life with happiness very quickly. |
03-30-2015, 04:38 PM | #5 |
YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: NJ USA
Posts: 492
| I too am so sorry for your loss. Yes that grief is so painful and real..doesn't feel like it will ever stop. I had to put down my dear little George on Jan 3. I truly was inconsolable. Everything made me cry..seeing my other dog, his brother so sad tore my heart out. I still cry when I think of him..but, thats ok. I still cry for my husband and dad who both just died a few years ago. Love is love and when a loved one leaves us, we hurt. Loss is very hard. I was not planning on getting another dog right away. I felt like I would be cheating on George…but, life has its own timing..and Sunni, came out of nowhere to me. I wasn't looking for her, but my friend knew I was brokenhearted. I didn't want to go out and hardly did..but she called to tell me about a little baby Yorkie that was going to a shelter because the breeder…well, thats not even important. Lets just say she/he was a mercenary """" (word rhymes with pick) lol. I said..I'll take her!! 4 hours later she was in my arms And, I was immediately in love! She didn't replace George, but she's filling up the empty space with her own little brand of love. I say all the time, that I'm pretty sure it was George up on the Rainbow Bridge who set this up. He would have loved Sunni to bits. I'm sure your Chanel probably made some arrangements for you too.. Enjoy your beautiful new puppy. |
03-30-2015, 05:01 PM | #6 | |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: San Jose CA USA
Posts: 129
| Quote:
And to the poster with the book about heaven...am going to look for it now! I saw there are some chapters in Radny Elkhorns book " Heaven" that deal specifically with will out pets be in heaven and is the biblical proof. ( apparently there is!) And even MORE interesting, We might be able to communicate with them with something that approaches language. They used the example that " Eve spoke to the serpent and didn't show any surprise to find a snake speaking to her" So it lead one to believe in heaven animals and people can talk. Would that be wonderful?
__________________ "Roxie" my adorable girl & WELCOME "Rascal" the Holy terrier RIP Chanel 4/2003-3/2015 | |
03-30-2015, 05:47 PM | #7 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Maui, Hawaii
Posts: 7,740
| I am so sorry for your loss. It is one of the worst life experiences people have to endure. So many of us have gone through this, and my heart goes out to you. Time helps heal some, but you will probably still be having those days of crying many years from now. You might find some help in this thread: http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/mem...-pet-loss.html It may help to talk about Channel, and if you want to share about the joys of her life, photos, etc., this is a wonderful place to do it. We'd love to hear about your special girl. Also, some people write a "Thank You Letter" to their beloved pet, and list 10 things they were thankful for, and post in the Memorial-RIP section. My Meika girl died in my arms a year ago at the age of 5 (due to toad poisoning) and I still well up with tears just thinking about her. I have many good memories, and I have 3 other pups I adore, but that hole in my heart is still there.... missing her always.
__________________ SANDY, MOM TO TIKI , KAYLA , KARLEE , R.I.P. MEIKA |
03-30-2015, 07:41 PM | #8 | |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: San Jose CA USA
Posts: 129
| Quote:
Thank you so much for sharing
__________________ "Roxie" my adorable girl & WELCOME "Rascal" the Holy terrier RIP Chanel 4/2003-3/2015 | |
03-31-2015, 09:02 AM | #9 | |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Delaware
Posts: 2,663
| Quote:
After six months I adopted another yorkie and at first I thought it was too soon because I felt so guilty. Brandi was an alpha diva and did not like other dogs near me. But Duchess won my heart and I no longer feel guilty. I have enough love in my heart for the both of them. I still think about Brandi...in fact I think about her every day. There are still so many things that remind me of her. I am so thankful I have her ashes. I now realized having Duchess didn't diminish my love for Brandi. It's been almost two years and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about Brandi but so happy the Duchess is now a part of my life. | |
03-31-2015, 09:32 AM | #10 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: San Jose CA USA
Posts: 129
| Yavenay.. You nailed it. I am feeling guilty- even though Chanel was far from an alpha- she was a attention hog and got upset when she felt like another dog was getting attention from me or Michael. ESPECIALLY after she went blind. She was paranoid that she coudn't see when one of us patted another dog- so she got very whiny whenever one was around. ( She just knew she was missing out on some rubs! LOL) because of that I was feeling VERY guilty about getting a new one. But I know from past experience the longer I wait to get a new one- the more likely I am to start feeling like another dog could never measure up to Chanel. I waited 12 years between Katy ( the first dog I ever truly bonded with) and Chanel And I do think it was too long and I stressed about being able to love Chanel as much as I did Katy. Now that's what I am reminding myself of. I loved Katy...but I ADORED Chanel. And I can only hope I will love Risa even more. And I think that is what is causing my guilt-"The thought of loving another dog more than I did Chanel". As I get older I find I have more time to bond with my doggies as I become less "all about me" Like I think I was when I was younger. Katy was in my 20's, Chanel was late 30's and 40's. And Risa Will be late 40's hopefully into my 60's. I just hope Chanel will forgive me and when I get to heaven I will have a blanket of fur babies who all get along instead of wanting to be the one and only. I'm picking up Risa this Saturday and am really looking forward to meeting her. I hope the trauma of leaving her Mommy for someone new isn't so hard on her. And I hope that I can make her feel loved and comforted as soon as possible....But leaving Chanel's ashes and blanket at home to travel for the first time without her in 12 years is going to be HARD, And that empty carrier I'll be carrying on the way to Kansas is going to do a real number on me. It's very mixed emotions.
__________________ "Roxie" my adorable girl & WELCOME "Rascal" the Holy terrier RIP Chanel 4/2003-3/2015 |
03-31-2015, 12:17 PM | #11 |
YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: NJ USA
Posts: 492
| I know it starts to get expensive, but I had to buy all new things for the puppy. She is a girl and George was male, so it wasn't about clothes. But, I took up his favorite toys and his dish, his bed and carrier and boxed them up. I kept all of Harry's stuff of course, but I did buy all new things for Sunni. I think you will get what I mean when I say, I really didn't want to see anyone playing with Georges favorite bunny, or sleep in his little bed. It helps a lot to just have his stuff put away. I'm looking forward to hearing how it goes with your new baby |
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