aggresive yorkie

[jsbart]

I posted a few days ago about my yorkie who pouts and is aggressive to me when I leave him alone and return. I've been trying to put him in a submissive position but after a really rough session with him today, I've decided to give up and just let him alone during these times. He is not doing any better and I feel if I continue, he will be afraid of me which I so don't want to happen. I would love for him to be the sweet little boy that he was when I first got him, but if I can't have that without so much stress (to him and me) I'll just have to love him when he wants me to and leave him alone when he's being ornery. I guess this is a case of having to pick your battles

[Batgirl38]

Maybe it's time for obedience training for your little boy. How old is he.

[kjc]

Hi and Welcome to YT!

Originally Posted by jsbart

I posted a few days ago about my yorkie who pouts and is aggressive to me when I leave him alone and return. I've been trying to put him in a submissive position but after a really rough session with him today, I've decided to give up and just let him alone during these times. He is not doing any better and I feel if I continue, he will be afraid of me which I so don't want to happen. I would love for him to be the sweet little boy that he was when I first got him, but if I can't have that without so much stress (to him and me) I'll just have to love him when he wants me to and leave him alone when he's being ornery. I guess this is a case of having to pick your battles

Do you mean rolling him over on his back and holding him down to try to make him submit? You can't force submission, and doing this over and over will make him more aggressive. This may be why he's pouting.


Exactly what does he do when you return home? How old is he? How long have you had him? How long has he been doing this behavior you don't like?

[yorkietalkjilly]

This is what I would tell anyone in your situation who has a dog over 4 - 5 months of age behaving as yours is:

When your dogs crosses a line, you need to stand up, clap your hands, fix him with your eyes(all alphas use the stare to send strong message to their pack members), say "Enough" or "No" in a firm voice, walk into him until he moves, back him off and allow him to willingly learn to submit himself - not put him in any submissive position yourself. Only by learning you are the one in charge by actively controlling his actions by turning away, softening his eyes, lying down or leaving the area will he learn who his real leader is. Don't act scary or anything with him - just begin to teach him who is in control and react the same way when he crosses the line until he learns. Before long, he will learn not to do it again as he knows the discipline session is coming and start to control his impulse to re-offend. In time a simple look with a spoken "Enough", "uh oh" or "no" is all it will take to send the same message.

[gemy]

I read your other thread, and even if it only happens when you return home, you really do need to rule out medical issues of course(unless you have already).

I would probably do a few things, when I return home, I would wait to open the Bathroom door if that is where you enclose. Either way, I would ignore the dog until I have been home for awhile 10 20 or 30 minutes, and without any fuss I would open the door. And I would not right now, ever go to pick him up. Let him come to you.

He obviously has some baggage he has brought to your relationship. Now you have not mentioned how often you walk and or play with your dog. This is important on a whole host of fronts. Number 1 walking the dog on lead, does help to assert your dominance, as does hand feeding. number 2 - a tired dog is a good dog. Dogs do need stimulation of different places, sights and smells.

As Jilly said unwanted behaviour you can focus very deliberately on your dog, and walk forward slowly. Hopefully the dog will turn away, or lose focus. Soften their gaze, dip their head, turn away etc.

Also a well respected behaviour trainer might be indicated, and or medications to help ease this poor boy's re-activity.

[kjc]

Sorry, I just read your 1st thread... I need to think on this overnight but maybe accept him as he is and be his friend, stop the battle of wills... if what he's doing isn't harmful to you or himself, let it be for now. A vet check wouldn't hurt. (Anal gland check, will make dogs hide and act weird) Is there a need to pick him up? I would just call him to me if I was going to grab something from the kitchen or to sit and watch TV. If he comes fine, reward him, if he doesn't, no big deal. Try using the phrase 'What a Good Boy!' when he does good things.

[jsbart]

Thanks for all the replies. I think since my baby has been through 3 other owners that he is just a very anxious and scared boy. Today I have closed the bathroom so he can't isolate himself and has to interact more with me. I'm trying my best to let him come to me and not pick him up, but it's hard because I want to hold him. Once I pick him up he's fine with being held. The couple who last owned him were at work all day and also boarded him fairly often. I'm retired and home with him all the time. For the first few months he was so sweet and wanted to be with me all the time. It seems that once he felt at home is when he started hiding out in the bathroom and sometimes he stays there for hours. He will come to the door and look at me as if to remind me that he's still mad and if I say anything to him he runs back to his "cave". I've tried totally ignoring him and eventually he will come sit with me on the couch, but it may be 4 or 5 hours before this happens. I feel so mean when I try to assert myself over him and since it's not having a positive effect, I'll just have to give him a lot of love and hope he'll get better. He's not aggressive any time other than when I've left him and return although he won't come to me when I call him. If I have to pick him up to take him outside when I put him down he bolts and runs. Has done this since the first day I got him. Just a lot of anxiety and very unsure of everything. I imagine that's why I'm the 4th person to own him in 5 years.

[kjc]

My Peek A Boo had 4 homes before mine. Seems like after 4-5 months he was expecting something to happen and became a bit withdrawn. I let him have his space and concentrated on our own routines till whatever it was passed. He flipped out when I washed his little bed. Just was panicky and running through the house. It was sad to see him so distressed. Took me a bit to figure out why... then I got him a spare bed so he'd always have one on the floor. That solved the problem. One never knows what they've learned or picked up through the years and previous owners, just have to work through it or around it.

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by jsbart

Thanks for all the replies. I think since my baby has been through 3 other owners that he is just a very anxious and scared boy. Today I have closed the bathroom so he can't isolate himself and has to interact more with me. I'm trying my best to let him come to me and not pick him up, but it's hard because I want to hold him. Once I pick him up he's fine with being held. The couple who last owned him were at work all day and also boarded him fairly often. I'm retired and home with him all the time. For the first few months he was so sweet and wanted to be with me all the time. It seems that once he felt at home is when he started hiding out in the bathroom and sometimes he stays there for hours. He will come to the door and look at me as if to remind me that he's still mad and if I say anything to him he runs back to his "cave". I've tried totally ignoring him and eventually he will come sit with me on the couch, but it may be 4 or 5 hours before this happens. I feel so mean when I try to assert myself over him and since it's not having a positive effect, I'll just have to give him a lot of love and hope he'll get better. He's not aggressive any time other than when I've left him and return although he won't come to me when I call him. If I have to pick him up to take him outside when I put him down he bolts and runs. Has done this since the first day I got him. Just a lot of anxiety and very unsure of everything. I imagine that's why I'm the 4th person to own him in 5 years.

This sounds like a different dog than the one you described in the original post and tells a more complete story of your dog. He's stressed, anxious, distrusting of people and keeping on trying to control him is having the opposite effect of gaining control - it's scaring him and making him wary of you. You two need a reset - a time of allowing him to learn to slowly trust you. After that session you described of trying to keep putting him into a submissive position until you just gave up, this little guy realizes you are not right now a natural leader, senses your lack of how to interact with and help him in the state he's in after having been moved from home to home and learning that people are not be trusted and is likely expecting you are going to be trying to put him into a submissive position or other controlling things that make him anxious and unsure of you and wants to stay in a safe place away from you for the time being. That is why he loves the solace of the bathroom. He feels safer there.

Don't worry, you did what you thought was right but it was wrong for this dog at this time in his life, failed completely and scared him and he and you both know that method isn't working and he's just trying to stay away from someone who he doesn't think has any idea how to deal with him right now. Oh, how we've all been there! We've all messed up as dog owners but dogs are eternally forgiving, given half a chance. We often present those type pictures to our dogs when we are inexperienced with troubled, anxious, unsure dogs and many of us make some mistakes that even exacerbate the problem but in time, you two can work through it and form a lasting, trusting bond. All is not lost and you two can simply reset your relationship if you are patient and willing to give him the time to heal and gain trust in you. It should take about two months of ignoring him, for starters! Sounds odd? That's the best way to help him right now. Give him his space.

For the present, I'd just ignore him and give him time to get over the trying to control and subdue him which he undoubtedly doesn't like or appreciate(as he distrusts people as it is) and made him unsure of you as he didn't understand what you were trying to do or why. Just allow him to be - let him stay in his safe place and go about your day, even should he come into the room where you are, just briefly look his way, smile and go on with what you were doing. He will begin feeling safe again given enough time - sensing that you won't do odd or scary things or try to assert yourself over him any more and that you have changed your approach. He'll learn that you lead the fun, gentle, rewarding way and want to come along with you as his trust builds.

Just allow him this time to heal and settle down and absorb that things won't ever get drastic again and in time, he'll slowly begin to come around you or check on you and go away again. Your job is to just act aloof - like an alpha dog leader does with his pack. He stays above the fray and the underlings all come currying favor from him, licking his lips, fawning and approaching him with heads and tails down, showing him they are not a threat but he still stays aloof and shows them he's above them. Try to act like that - as hard as it is with a cute Yorkie near you. You want him to want to approach you and in time, he'll come to understand that all the moves are his to make. He'll begin to trust you not to make odd moves on him or scare him. Dogs who are not fearful crave companionship and actually prefer to be in the room with their companion, usually actually touching their companion during times of relaxation.

In time, when he's healed and more trusting of you because you've given him his space and time, he'll begin to approach you and seek out more of a relationship - real companionship. This is your time to not go crazy and give him a flurry of hugs and kisses - that could set him back and trigger old sensations of your trying to manually control him. Just reward his attentions with a smile, even a pat if he's put his head into your hand and then leave him alone and go back to acting aloof. Make him work at getting your attention and let him know that he's in control (for the time being) of who approaches whom and when. It will give him the sense of security and trust in you he needs if you will treat him like this - allowing him to do all the flirting and asking for attention. Don't worry - you won't be sending bad lessons to your dog he's in control in the home - quite the contrary - you'll be acting like an alpha leader and making your dog curry favor with you and seek you out - work to get your attention.

After a couple of months of this, if this were my dog, I'd then begin to reward his approaches with a treat and gentle praise. Now, he's going to love that - he'll begin to come in more frequently in order to get his treat and positive reinforcement as long as you keep it to simply the treat, a smile, pat and a gentle word and then get busy doing something else - always leaving him wanting more for the time being. Keep your interactions with him non-threatening and unexciting and low key for the next two months now that he's wanting your attentions but every time he comes near you and touches you, treat and praise him in your very low key manner. When he's begun coming around frequently and doesn't leave the room when you arise from your chair or make expensive gestures, you will know he's over the fear or distrust of you to a large extent but will still remember the bad times for the next year or so and any moves you make that begin to mimic controlling him may trigger him running off to the bathroom and staying.

That's all you need to do for the next two months - ignore him for two months or so and when he's healed and begins to seek your attentions out, begin to treat and reward him when he approaches but keep it low key and simple.

After two months of that type re-orientation training using the treats and praise of his coming around and wanting interaction, slowly building trust, you should have rehabbed his trust and belief in you to a point that you can then begin to work with him in a few simple obedience commands, teaching him things he needs to learn to be safe and showing him how fun it is to work together for something - a goal of working together to learn obedience for a treat and your praise and he'll begin to gain control of his impulses and love the instant gratification he gets from your treat and praise when he gets his command right. Keep your training to short 5 minute sessions, make it fun and keep it upbeat, using an upbeat tone of voice to speak the commands rather then issuing military-toned commands that sound threatening to many dogs as many trainers tend to do. Dogs love to work learning new things and in time, they actually learn to delay self-gratification and control themselves and do what you want in order to get a greater reward and your praise when he's done what you're teaching him. Over months, their brains become used to doing what we say and they become habituated to obeying us, sort of like Pavlov's dogs, they just obey almost by rote and always because the positive reinforcement in waiting for them - our smile, pride, the treat and happiness. They love all aspects of training when it's fun, loving, gentle and patient and brings them lots of gratification and rewards. You'll love it, too, and you'll love the dog you are reshaping and creating before your very eyes. Obedience training and setting boundaries can totally bring you a wonderful new pet in no time once he's been gently brought through the building his trust and self-confidence through the method I've described above.

After each training session, let him outside to run off his stress and have a good play session with him tossing a ball or squeaking all his toys and tossing them to him one at a time or however he enjoys playing. Then a gentle pat, a smile and give him a treat and say "That's all for today" and he'll likely want a nap now.

That's how I would approach this dog if he were in my home given the experiences you've related and see if this won't reset his opinion of you and your leadership skills and bring about a new, trusting relationship.

[jsbart]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

This sounds like a different dog than the one you described in the original post and tells a more complete story of your dog. He's stressed, anxious, distrusting of people and keeping on trying to control him is having the opposite effect of gaining control - it's scaring him and making him wary of you. You two need a reset - a time of allowing him to learn to slowly trust you. After that session you described of trying to keep putting him into a submissive position until you just gave up, this little guy realizes you are not right now a natural leader, senses your lack of how to interact with and help him in the state he's in after having been moved from home to home and learning that people are not be trusted and is likely expecting you are going to be trying to put him into a submissive position or other controlling things that make him anxious and unsure of you and wants to stay in a safe place away from you for the time being. That is why he loves the solace of the bathroom. He feels safer there.

Don't worry, you did what you thought was right but it was wrong for this dog at this time in his life, failed completely and scared him and he and you both know that method isn't working and he's just trying to stay away from someone who he doesn't think has any idea how to deal with him right now. Oh, how we've all been there! We've all messed up as dog owners but dogs are eternally forgiving, given half a chance. We often present those type pictures to our dogs when we are inexperienced with troubled, anxious, unsure dogs and many of us make some mistakes that even exacerbate the problem but in time, you two can work through it and form a lasting, trusting bond. All is not lost and you two can simply reset your relationship if you are patient and willing to give him the time to heal and gain trust in you. It should take about two months of ignoring him, for starters! Sounds odd? That's the best way to help him right now. Give him his space.

For the present, I'd just ignore him and give him time to get over the trying to control and subdue him which he undoubtedly doesn't like or appreciate(as he distrusts people as it is) and made him unsure of you as he didn't understand what you were trying to do or why. Just allow him to be - let him stay in his safe place and go about your day, even should he come into the room where you are, just briefly look his way, smile and go on with what you were doing. He will begin feeling safe again given enough time - sensing that you won't do odd or scary things or try to assert yourself over him any more and that you have changed your approach. He'll learn that you lead the fun, gentle, rewarding way and want to come along with you as his trust builds.

Just allow him this time to heal and settle down and absorb that things won't ever get drastic again and in time, he'll slowly begin to come around you or check on you and go away again. Your job is to just act aloof - like an alpha dog leader does with his pack. He stays above the fray and the underlings all come currying favor from him, licking his lips, fawning and approaching him with heads and tails down, showing him they are not a threat but he still stays aloof and shows them he's above them. Try to act like that - as hard as it is with a cute Yorkie near you. You want him to want to approach you and in time, he'll come to understand that all the moves are his to make. He'll begin to trust you not to make odd moves on him or scare him. Dogs who are not fearful crave companionship and actually prefer to be in the room with their companion, usually actually touching their companion during times of relaxation.

In time, when he's healed and more trusting of you because you've given him his space and time, he'll begin to approach you and seek out more of a relationship - real companionship. This is your time to not go crazy and give him a flurry of hugs and kisses - that could set him back and trigger old sensations of your trying to manually control him. Just reward his attentions with a smile, even a pat if he's put his head into your hand and then leave him alone and go back to acting aloof. Make him work at getting your attention and let him know that he's in control (for the time being) of who approaches whom and when. It will give him the sense of security and trust in you he needs if you will treat him like this - allowing him to do all the flirting and asking for attention. Don't worry - you won't be sending bad lessons to your dog he's in control in the home - quite the contrary - you'll be acting like an alpha leader and making your dog curry favor with you and seek you out - work to get your attention.

After a couple of months of this, if this were my dog, I'd then begin to reward his approaches with a treat and gentle praise. Now, he's going to love that - he'll begin to come in more frequently in order to get his treat and positive reinforcement as long as you keep it to simply the treat, a smile, pat and a gentle word and then get busy doing something else - always leaving him wanting more for the time being. Keep your interactions with him non-threatening and unexciting and low key for the next two months now that he's wanting your attentions but every time he comes near you and touches you, treat and praise him in your very low key manner. When he's begun coming around frequently and doesn't leave the room when you arise from your chair or make expensive gestures, you will know he's over the fear or distrust of you to a large extent but will still remember the bad times for the next year or so and any moves you make that begin to mimic controlling him may trigger him running off to the bathroom and staying.

That's all you need to do for the next two months - ignore him for two months or so and when he's healed and begins to seek your attentions out, begin to treat and reward him when he approaches but keep it low key and simple.

After two months of that type re-orientation training using the treats and praise of his coming around and wanting interaction, slowly building trust, you should have rehabbed his trust and belief in you to a point that you can then begin to work with him in a few simple obedience commands, teaching him things he needs to learn to be safe and showing him how fun it is to work together for something - a goal of working together to learn obedience for a treat and your praise and he'll begin to gain control of his impulses and love the instant gratification he gets from your treat and praise when he gets his command right. Keep your training to short 5 minute sessions, make it fun and keep it upbeat, using an upbeat tone of voice to speak the commands rather then issuing military-toned commands that sound threatening to many dogs as many trainers tend to do. Dogs love to work learning new things and in time, they actually learn to delay self-gratification and control themselves and do what you want in order to get a greater reward and your praise when he's done what you're teaching him. Over months, their brains become used to doing what we say and they become habituated to obeying us, sort of like Pavlov's dogs, they just obey almost by rote and always because the positive reinforcement in waiting for them - our smile, pride, the treat and happiness. They love all aspects of training when it's fun, loving, gentle and patient and brings them lots of gratification and rewards. You'll love it, too, and you'll love the dog you are reshaping and creating before your very eyes. Obedience training and setting boundaries can totally bring you a wonderful new pet in no time once he's been gently brought through the building his trust and self-confidence through the method I've described above.

After each training session, let him outside to run off his stress and have a good play session with him tossing a ball or squeaking all his toys and tossing them to him one at a time or however he enjoys playing. Then a gentle pat, a smile and give him a treat and say "That's all for today" and he'll likely want a nap now.

That's how I would approach this dog if he were in my home given the experiences you've related and see if this won't reset his opinion of you and your leadership skills and bring about a new, trusting relationship.

Thanks for your advice. I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. As I stated before, I've definitely come to the conclusion that what I was doing was wrong and have spent the last two days trying to make amends by showing probably too much attention. However, he has been so much better for the last two days, but I will try to tone it down and not pay him so much attention. I guess I was just trying to atone for my misguided behavior. You know, it's almost like he knows that I've come to an understanding that I was doing more harm than good.

I do want to say that he started behaving this way long before I tried to show him I was in charge. I felt like he became dominant maybe because I showed him more attention than he was used to. When it seemed to get worse, is when I tried to make him submissive which only made him fearful. I was pretty much at the end of ideas as to how to approach the problem. I think I may continue to keep him out of the bathroom. It hasn't seemed to make him feel threatened and in fact he has chosen to be with me more since he can't go to his "cave". I have two other dogs who stay in the house also and hope maybe since they are stable and calm some of their attitude will rub off on him. This may sound crazy but his facial expression has gone from looking mean to looking sweet again. Again, thanks for your thoughts and maybe soon he will be calmer and more relaxed. I think it's just in his nature to be anxious and I'm not expecting miracles--just want us both to be happy.

[Maximo]

Originally Posted by jsbart

Thanks for your advice. I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. As I stated before, I've definitely come to the conclusion that what I was doing was wrong and have spent the last two days trying to make amends by showing probably too much attention. However, he has been so much better for the last two days, but I will try to tone it down and not pay him so much attention. I guess I was just trying to atone for my misguided behavior. You know, it's almost like he knows that I've come to an understanding that I was doing more harm than good.

I do want to say that he started behaving this way long before I tried to show him I was in charge. I felt like he became dominant maybe because I showed him more attention than he was used to. When it seemed to get worse, is when I tried to make him submissive which only made him fearful. I was pretty much at the end of ideas as to how to approach the problem. I think I may continue to keep him out of the bathroom. It hasn't seemed to make him feel threatened and in fact he has chosen to be with me more since he can't go to his "cave". I have two other dogs who stay in the house also and hope maybe since they are stable and calm some of their attitude will rub off on him. This may sound crazy but his facial expression has gone from looking mean to looking sweet again. Again, thanks for your thoughts and maybe soon he will be calmer and more relaxed. I think it's just in his nature to be anxious and I'm not expecting miracles--just want us both to be happy.

Happy to hear his facial expression has changed. I agree with Jeanie's advice. Even Yorkies who come from ideal circumstances can resist being dominated or 'forced' into affection. The trick is to be in charge without being forceful, and to encourage the affection on their terms. Establishing trust first is vital, and a having a routine is very helpful in this department. Then build little rituals on top of that. My boys are 5 and almost 6 years old and they still come up with new little rituals of love.

Be predictable in your behavior, even-keeled. Make life fun.

I believe that my boys became affectionate because we encouraged it rather than forcing it on them. We withdraw attention when the dogs display negative behavior.

The dogs will sit on our laps, cuddle with us, give us kisses because they know we won't hold them prisoner. If they want to leave us to go bark at a squirrel on the deck, or get a toy, or go to their beds, they know they are free to leave.

They also have learned that good behavior and affection will bring rewards like a walk in the park or a meal. They know how to butter us up performing sits or kissing our legs.

Best wishes to you and your little guy.

[kjc]

Originally Posted by jsbart

Thanks for your advice. I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. As I stated before, I've definitely come to the conclusion that what I was doing was wrong and have spent the last two days trying to make amends by showing probably too much attention. However, he has been so much better for the last two days, but I will try to tone it down and not pay him so much attention. I guess I was just trying to atone for my misguided behavior. You know, it's almost like he knows that I've come to an understanding that I was doing more harm than good.

I do want to say that he started behaving this way long before I tried to show him I was in charge. I felt like he became dominant maybe because I showed him more attention than he was used to. When it seemed to get worse, is when I tried to make him submissive which only made him fearful. I was pretty much at the end of ideas as to how to approach the problem. I think I may continue to keep him out of the bathroom. It hasn't seemed to make him feel threatened and in fact he has chosen to be with me more since he can't go to his "cave". I have two other dogs who stay in the house also and hope maybe since they are stable and calm some of their attitude will rub off on him. This may sound crazy but his facial expression has gone from looking mean to looking sweet again. Again, thanks for your thoughts and maybe soon he will be calmer and more relaxed. I think it's just in his nature to be anxious and I'm not expecting miracles--just want us both to be happy.

Sounds like you're on the right track... great to see such a fast turnaround! Keep us posted...

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by jsbart

Thanks for your advice. I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. As I stated before, I've definitely come to the conclusion that what I was doing was wrong and have spent the last two days trying to make amends by showing probably too much attention. However, he has been so much better for the last two days, but I will try to tone it down and not pay him so much attention. I guess I was just trying to atone for my misguided behavior. You know, it's almost like he knows that I've come to an understanding that I was doing more harm than good.

I do want to say that he started behaving this way long before I tried to show him I was in charge. I felt like he became dominant maybe because I showed him more attention than he was used to. When it seemed to get worse, is when I tried to make him submissive which only made him fearful. I was pretty much at the end of ideas as to how to approach the problem. I think I may continue to keep him out of the bathroom. It hasn't seemed to make him feel threatened and in fact he has chosen to be with me more since he can't go to his "cave". I have two other dogs who stay in the house also and hope maybe since they are stable and calm some of their attitude will rub off on him. This may sound crazy but his facial expression has gone from looking mean to looking sweet again. Again, thanks for your thoughts and maybe soon he will be calmer and more relaxed. I think it's just in his nature to be anxious and I'm not expecting miracles--just want us both to be happy.

The best way to handle a dominant or aggressive dog is to show his your leadership and not your dominance. Just require him to do things before he gets anything he wants - the Nothing In Life Is Free Program and get them busy having to do what we say before they get to play with a toy, go for a walk, get a meal, get a cuddle or kiss or get to join us on the couch or bed.

Also, setting boundaries and should they cross them and continue biting on the furniture leg after you've said, "No" or "Leave it", get up, pin them with your eyes and walk into their space and force them to stand down, turn away or leave the area. If they jump up onto the couch or bed and begin to growl should anyone else want to join them, get up and without rancor or anger or dominance, matter-of-factly remove them and require them to "ask" to get up. Always remain in teaching mode and teachers usually don't dominate but lead us along willingly. The dog will learn that you call the shots and in time will begin to learn, if he's not in pain or ill, that complying with your requests is the only way to get him what he wants out of life and will work hard to do things your reasonable way.

Reward good behavior and stop poor behavior and show him the right way to do things, and he'll begin to change his ways.

I disagree with keeping the bathroom door shut, myself, as I'd want this dog to have his space for right now and spend time with me by his personal choice - not because I was manipulating his access. He's "choosing" you right now because his den of safety is shut off. Give him a real choice and see what he does for the time being. That's his sanctuary right now and I'd allow him some time there as he learns to trust you again. I'd want him to stay out and come around me because he chooses to stay out - has gained trust in me and began to accept me - not because he couldn't get to his area of quiet and safety. But that's just my approach to rehab - on the dog's terms usually. I just think in the long run a dog will advance further faster if given viable choices, isn't manipulated and works it out himself. Heck, if you have other dogs in the house, he's got to be fairly scared of you to want to stay in there so much you've had to shut the door and I'd want him to have that ability as long as he's retaining his present level of fear and insecurity. He's had a rocky life - has changed homes too much and has no real respect or trust in humans right now so I'd give him his space for now. If this dog were in my home, I would allow him to heal and gain trust over time and after a couple of months of this, I'd make him coming around me extremely attractive with a treat and smile and a little praise and then let him otherwise be as this troubled dogs begins to learn to trust again.

Given time and ignoring him for a while, remaining aloof and giving him his choices, he's going to ultimately choose you and your companionship without any type of manipulation requiring him to stay away from his area of safety. Ultimately, he's your dog and you must do as you see fit but I'd be leery of manipulating him into spending time with me after some of the sessions you've described with him that probably left him pretty shaken and insecure around you. But he'll get over that - he's a dog - he'll take his time, begin to loathe his isolation and see you've changed your ways and begin to seek you out and by the time you've had him a year more, he'll be your constant companion! Don't feel bad for the things you were trying - the forcing him into submission and so forth - you just didn't know. We've all watched Cesar Millan shows and read books that encourage that type of dominance/bullying but it doesn't work on really insecure, fearful dogs and will do more harm than good for a while. Don't beat yourself up - your dog won't. He'll move on once he sees you've changed and you two will form a good, tight bond of forever friends.

[jsbart]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

The best way to handle a dominant or aggressive dog is to show his your leadership and not your dominance. Just require him to do things before he gets anything he wants - the Nothing In Life Is Free Program and get them busy having to do what we say before they get to play with a toy, go for a walk, get a meal, get a cuddle or kiss or get to join us on the couch or bed.

Also, setting boundaries and should they cross them and continue biting on the furniture leg after you've said, "No" or "Leave it", get up, pin them with your eyes and walk into their space and force them to stand down, turn away or leave the area. If they jump up onto the couch or bed and begin to growl should anyone else want to join them, get up and without rancor or anger or dominance, matter-of-factly remove them and require them to "ask" to get up. Always remain in teaching mode and teachers usually don't dominate but lead us along willingly. The dog will learn that you call the shots and in time will begin to learn, if he's not in pain or ill, that complying with your requests is the only way to get him what he wants out of life and will work hard to do things your reasonable way.

Reward good behavior and stop poor behavior and show him the right way to do things, and he'll begin to change his ways.

I disagree with keeping the bathroom door shut, myself, as I'd want this dog to have his space for right now and spend time with me by his personal choice - not because I was manipulating his access. He's "choosing" you right now because his den of safety is shut off. Give him a real choice and see what he does for the time being. That's his sanctuary right now and I'd allow him some time there as he learns to trust you again. I'd want him to stay out and come around me because he chooses to stay out - has gained trust in me and began to accept me - not because he couldn't get to his area of quiet and safety. But that's just my approach to rehab - on the dog's terms usually. I just think in the long run a dog will advance further faster if given viable choices, isn't manipulated and works it out himself. Heck, if you have other dogs in the house, he's got to be fairly scared of you to want to stay in there so much you've had to shut the door and I'd want him to have that ability as long as he's retaining his present level of fear and insecurity. He's had a rocky life - has changed homes too much and has no real respect or trust in humans right now so I'd give him his space for now. If this dog were in my home, I would allow him to heal and gain trust over time and after a couple of months of this, I'd make him coming around me extremely attractive with a treat and smile and a little praise and then let him otherwise be as this troubled dogs begins to learn to trust again.

Given time and ignoring him for a while, remaining aloof and giving him his choices, he's going to ultimately choose you and your companionship without any type of manipulation requiring him to stay away from his area of safety. Ultimately, he's your dog and you must do as you see fit but I'd be leery of manipulating him into spending time with me after some of the sessions you've described with him that probably left him pretty shaken and insecure around you. But he'll get over that - he's a dog - he'll take his time, begin to loathe his isolation and see you've changed your ways and begin to seek you out and by the time you've had him a year more, he'll be your constant companion! Don't feel bad for the things you were trying - the forcing him into submission and so forth - you just didn't know. We've all watched Cesar Millan shows and read books that encourage that type of dominance/bullying but it doesn't work on really insecure, fearful dogs and will do more harm than good for a while. Don't beat yourself up - your dog won't. He'll move on once he sees you've changed and you two will form a good, tight bond of forever friends.

Well, today is the first time I've left home since Sun. when I had such a meltdown with Brodie. As usual, he was holed up in the bathroom when I came home but did come out a little sooner than usual. I'm ignoring him (hard to do) and he's coming in the room with me, but hasn't made any effort to jump up and sit with me. I know Yorkies are supposed to be playful and fun, but my little fellow has no interest in toys, doesn't notice squirrels, won't play with me or my other dogs (dachshunds) and therefore, has no outlet for any excess energy or anxiety. I'm don't know if he's been this way with everyone else but probably has. When I first got him he was constantly humping one of my dachshund to the point that I thought I may have to return him to the previous owner. My dachshund is so good natured that he just put up with it and finally after about a week he stopped. That's about the only interaction he's had with my other dogs which I think is a dominant trait. He wants to snip at my other dogs if they try to come up to sit with me when he's already there. They pretty much ignore him, but my youngest dachshund (I have one 13 and one 5) has gotten enough of it a time or two and jumped on him. It scared him badly but not enough that he didn't continue to do it. I just want him to feel relaxed, content and happy. Trying hard to make that happen.

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by jsbart

Well, today is the first time I've left home since Sun. when I had such a meltdown with Brodie. As usual, he was holed up in the bathroom when I came home but did come out a little sooner than usual. I'm ignoring him (hard to do) and he's coming in the room with me, but hasn't made any effort to jump up and sit with me. I know Yorkies are supposed to be playful and fun, but my little fellow has no interest in toys, doesn't notice squirrels, won't play with me or my other dogs (dachshunds) and therefore, has no outlet for any excess energy or anxiety. I'm don't know if he's been this way with everyone else but probably has. When I first got him he was constantly humping one of my dachshund to the point that I thought I may have to return him to the previous owner. My dachshund is so good natured that he just put up with it and finally after about a week he stopped. That's about the only interaction he's had with my other dogs which I think is a dominant trait. He wants to snip at my other dogs if they try to come up to sit with me when he's already there. They pretty much ignore him, but my youngest dachshund (I have one 13 and one 5) has gotten enough of it a time or two and jumped on him. It scared him badly but not enough that he didn't continue to do it. I just want him to feel relaxed, content and happy. Trying hard to make that happen.

He's just temporarily shutting down and needing his space for fear of being subjected to things he doesn't like or fears. If I were you and he were my dog, I'd just let him get over it all and learn how to trust again. He's a troubled dog that you knew about when you got him and whose been moved from home-to-home and no doubt is unsure about playing, chasing squirrels or anything as he's basically distrustful of what might come next in life. Some dogs just take the easy way out and want to isolate when they get too scared. Normally, we don't want that and encourage getting them involved in distracting activities but with this dog, in this particular instance after some of the things he's recently been through which no doubt traumatized him further, I'd give him his space and ignore him until he begins to see things have changed.

I'd just give him ample time and space, keep my interactions with him very limited and allow him to grow assured over time that nothing else drastic is going to happen. Live and let live. I guarantee you he will begin to seek you out on his own when he's healed enough psychologically. Those sessions of trying to put him into submission and assert yourself are likely still too fresh in his mind but he'll move on given time and begin to forget and live in the moment. He'll see you going about your business, non-threatening and not trying to assert yourself, he'll notice he's being ignored on a regular basis and begin to seek you out.

In time, you can reward that behavior and make him glad he did. Once he's rehabilitated over his trials and tribulations from his many changes of homes and owners and rebuilt his trust, you can teach him all about playing and one day, when he takes ownership of your home as his very own, he'll show a lot more interest in the peripheral things most dogs enjoy and run and play. But right now, he's just a traumatized dog who apparently didn't like things he was dealing with on a daily basis, maybe something you or the other dogs did and with his bad, troubled history and distrust of all things - maybe he was bullied or attacked by other dogs in his other home(s) or neighborhood - and he just found a safe place to stay and then got more traumatized by your trying to help him and do what you thought he needed at the time.

It's going to take time but with love, patience, reading all you can about positive reinforcement and how to interact with troubled dogs in books and online, you'll find ways to bring him out of himself once he regains trust in humans. He'll get there - just give him some space and time until he begins to ask for your attention and makes himself available to you willingly and eventually, once he's comfortable seeking you out and is jumping up to be near you, then you can close the bathroom door for a few hours a little at a time to gradually encourage his staying in the room with you, if you think that's best when the time comes. Give your other dogs lots of hugs and attention and play sessions and in time, it might start to make him want some of that sooner rather than later but until then, I wouldn't force him to make hard choices he's not yet ready to make.